


Angel of Death

by Supernaturallycrazy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, Assassin Castiel, Bottom Dean, Fluff and Smut, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, Major Character Injury, Mechanic Dean, Oral Sex, Protective Dean Winchester, Top Castiel, angst (maybe)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-15
Updated: 2015-03-15
Packaged: 2018-03-17 23:22:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 53,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3547541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Supernaturallycrazy/pseuds/Supernaturallycrazy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Dean overhears Crowley hiring an assassin to take out Sam, Dean know that he will do anything in his power to save his little brother.</p><p>or </p><p>The one where Dean seduces an assassin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Mistake

**Author's Note:**

> So, my best friend had a dream where her roommate was going to be murdered to she seduced the killer to save her... and I wrote a fan fiction about it.

If you asked Sam and Dean Winchester about all the horrible things that happened in their life they would probably tell you that the cause of all these things was their father. Or Sam would tell you that. Dean would probably tell you it was bad luck but it his head he'd be thinking exactly the same thing as his brother.  
From the outside the two men seemed to have a pretty carefree life. They both had their own apartments that weren’t too far away from each other and consequently they spent more time together than most adults did with their families. But that was good. Anyone would tell you that they were best friends as well as brothers  
Dean worked at a mechanic in town. If you asked anyone, they would tell you Dean Winchester was the best. And if you walked past ‘Singer Auto’ you could hear his music playing, if you were lucky enough you'd even hear him singing along and you'd laugh at the way he was surprisingly good. You would see him standing there in his mechanics uniform, sometimes without a shirt on those hot days, he'd be covered in grease and you would know that the job was perfect for him. Anyone and everyone knew that there was no place he would rather be than under the hood of a beautiful car, except maybe under a beautiful girl... or guy.  
Sam worked two jobs. He tutored high school and college kids during the day and he worked as a bar tender at the local bar in town at night. The bar tending gig was really just to get a little extra cash but Sam had found he actually rather enjoyed it. It was fun and he got to work with his friend Jo. She was awesome and in a very short time, she had become like family to both the brothers. The thing Sam enjoyed most though was watching the people who came and went. Every night there were interesting people and Sam chatted to anyone he could at every chance he got.  
So these were the lives of Sam and Dean Winchester. Or at least that’s what it looked like. But that was so far from the truth. Their lives were chaos. Sure they did all of the things that made people look normal but they were anything but. They were owned. Their souls were owned by a barbaric man that went by the name of Crowley. And there wasn’t a thing they could do about it.  
And it was for that reason that Sam blamed their father for the awful things in their life. It was because of John Winchester that they had spent the last 7 years of their lives at the beck and call of a criminal.  
And they were all set to continue living like that for at least another three.

 

…

 

“GODDAMNIT SAM” Dean yelled as he slammed his apartment door behind him. “HOW COULD YOU HAVE FUCKED UP SO BADLY?! 7 YEARS AND NOT ONE FUCK UP AND NOW THIS?! CROWLEY IS GOING TO HAVE OUR ASSES SERVED TO HIM ON A FUCKING SILVER PLATTER!” Dean was hammering into Sam. The younger man didn’t think he’d ever seen his brother so angry. He didn’t argue back though. He knew he had fucked up and he knew Crowley was not going to be happy.  
“FUCKING HELL SAM. IT WAS JUST A DRUG RUN! HOW MANY OF THEM HAVE WE DONE BEFORE WITHOUT SCREWING UP EVERYTHING?!” Dean hadn’t stopped yelling. “THIS IS EVEN WORSE THAN YOUR FUCK UP WITH RUBY”  
Sam flinched. Dean always brought that up when he was angry. Again though, he supposed it was fair. Ruby was the daughter of the leader of ‘The Demons’ gang, and that guy was practically Crowley’s arch enemy. Sam’s little roll around in the hay with her had almost cost Sam and Dean their lives.  
Dean saw his little brothers reaction to his words and realised that he'd probably crossed the line. There was no reason to make Sam feel bad for something he had been forgiven for a long time ago. He sighed long and hard and finally stopped yelling. “Why do have to start fights like that Sammy?”  
If he was being perfectly honest, Dean knew that he started more fights than his brother. But he always made sure that the fights he started had no life threatening repercussions. All of his brawls where at bars with assholes that had nothing to do with Crowley’s business. He might be a little hot-headed but even he knew not to start a fight with one of Crowley’s best customers and then go and lose all of Crowley’s money.  
“I couldn't let him say those things.” Sam said quietly. Dean sighed. He also knew why Sam had done what he did, and Dean could say he blamed him, the asshole totally had it coming. Both the Winchester boys had had their share of creeps obsessing over them, for Dean it was Alistair and for Sam it was Azazel. That freaks obsession with Sam had become pretty common knowledge amongst the different gangs, along with how the fire he had started, intending to kill Sam, had actually killed his girlfriend Jess. Every now and then they came across some dickhead who thought he had the right to talk about it to Sam. Not just talk, but remind him that his girlfriend would still be alive it if weren’t for him.  
So if they hadn’t been in the middle of a drug run for their mobster boss, then Dean would have totally backed up his little brother.  
“I know Sam, I know.” He said, “But we lost Crowley his drugs, his money, and most likely his best customer. So I’d say we’re proper fucked when he realises.” Dean placed his hand on his brother’s shoulder reassuringly. “We might just have to extent our contract by a few years.” He said weakly.  
Neither of them wanted to do that, but they might have no other option. They stood there in silence for a few moments and then Dean suggested that Sam stay with him tonight, wanting to be able to keep an eye on his brother. He fetched them both a beer and Sam put on a movie. They sat down on the couch quietly and both pretended they were watching what was playing on the screen.  
They were thinking about their contract with Crowley. They had signed on for 10 years of service, which was how long it would take to pay back their fathers debt. They had been at it for 7 years already and now it might seem like they had longer than their initial 3 years left.  
It was all their dad’s fault. Dean hated thinking it but just because he didn’t like it, didn’t mean it wasn’t the truth. Their dad and his fucking drug problem. It wasn’t until John had died 7 years ago that the brothers realised how far gone on drugs their father actually was. They had both just thought he was an alcoholic, a few times Dean had suspected that there might have been something more but he had always dismissed those thoughts as ridiculous. But when John had died, Sam and Dean had been approached by a Mr. Fergus Crowley who informed them that they had now inherited their father’s long standing drug debt.  
Sam and Dean didn’t have the money to pay back the debt. In fact Dean doubted they ever would have been able to pay it back. This became apparent to Crowley as well, as soon as he had realised that the boys where both just as broke as their father.  
John had been a Marine before his wife had died. Dean remembered the police telling them that Mary had died in an electrical fire. John had never believed that though. He became convinced that she was murdered, he dragged the boys from place to place while he hunted down the supposed killer. Looking back on it now, Dean realised that it was probably the drugs making his dad believe those things. He had spent most of his childhood looking over his shoulder because his dad was a paranoid drug addict. John’s paranoia meant that he had trained both Sam and Dean, taught them practically everything that he had learnt in the Marines. Dean knew how to work a gun better than a pen when he was just 10 years old.  
When Crowley had discovered that the Winchesters were better equipped for combat then most of the men already in his service, he proposed a solution. They would work for him in order to pay off the debt. Their father had been a customer of Crowley’s for 10 years and so it was decided that their contract would also be that length of time. 10 years was a long time. And Dean had no wish to extend it.  
He sighed and began mentally preparing himself for having to go visit his boss the next day. 

 

…

 

Dean stepped into Crowley compound and suddenly realised that he probably should have called first. Crowley didn’t like surprises. But it was too late now so Dean just shrugged and kept walking. He started making his way to the main room of the house, where Crowley did most of his business. He stopped outside the door, hearing a lot of yelling. His curiosity got the better of him and he pressed his ear against the door.  
“I WANT SAM WINCHESTER DEAD.” screamed a very angry Crowley. Deans eyes widened and he adjusted his position so he could hear better.  
“THAT LITTLE PRICK HAS SREWED ME OVER ONE TOO MANY TIMES.” the screaming continued.  
“Sir, are you sure that’s a good idea?” asked another man, presumably one of Crowley’s messenger men.  
“Of course I’m sure, send Mr. Goode over to Sam’s apartment and tell him I expect the boy to be 6 feet under by tonight.” came Crowley’s reply.  
Mr. Goode… oh Dean knew him. He scoffed lightly, Dean could take on that guy easy. Hell, Sam could take that guy on. Crowley seemed to have forgotten how well trained him and his brother were.  
“Sir, I doubt that Mr. Goode has the… skills to take on a Winchester and win.” said the other voice. Dean couldn't help but smirk. He liked this dude, he clearly knew what he was talking about.  
“Okay then, if you're the expert, who would have the skill set?” Crowley asked sarcastically, clearly not happy about being defied.  
“Honestly sir, no one that we possess in our infantry. If we wanted to take out Sam, we would be going up against Dean as well… and we both know what he does to people who try and hurt his little brother.”  
Crowley was silent and Dean didn’t doubt that he has running through the long list of people that Dean had hurt in the name of protecting Sammy. The most obvious was Azazel. Sam and Dean had taken care of that one together. There was this other guy about two years ago, he pulled a gun on Sam and Dean didn’t think he'd woken up from that coma yet. In short, it was a well-known fact the Winchesters would die for each other. You didn’t want to hurt one of them because you'd spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder and waiting for the other to catch up with you.  
The unknown man continued speaking. “Truthfully sir, I think your best option would be to exterminate them both.”  
Well that escalated quickly, Dean thought.  
“No.” Crowley replied immediately. “I will not lose Dean Winchester, he’s the best we've got. He’s ruthless and he’s efficient. He does what needs to be done and he does it as soon as he’s asked to. But he’s brother is a liability and he needs to be disposed of immediately.”  
Dean was starting to get nervous now. Crowley seemed pretty hell bent on killing his brother, no matter how obvious is was that the odds were stacked against him.  
“sir, there is only one person I can think of with the efficiency and ability to kill one Winchester and get away without killing or being killed by the other…” Dean noted that the guy seemed to be very cautious about what he was saying.  
“And who would that be?” Crowley still clearly wasn’t ecstatic about having to change his plans.  
“…the angel, sir.”  
“The angel?” Crowley asked. “As in the assassin?”  
“Yes sir, he is renowned for his efficiency and his willingness to work for anyone for the right price.” Dean heard the other voice say. “And Sam Winchester isn’t exactly a high profile target so it shouldn't be too expensive.” the voice continued.  
“Hmmm…” Crowley pondered the option for a moment. “Do we have a way to initiating contact with this man?’  
“I believe his contact details were in the address book that we obtained from Zachariah after his demise…”  
There was shuffling heard though the door and Dean assumed that they were searching for the book. After a few moments of murmuring, Dean heard the unmistakable sound of a phones dial tone. Crowley must have put in on loudspeaker. Dean sat, unmoving, trying desperately to stay absolutely quiet as to hear the man on the phone.  
The phone was answered.  
“State your business.” Said a rough voice on the other end. Dean was shocked by the man’s apparent abruptness, and consequently so was Crowley as he fumbled with his words a little bit.  
“Oh… um… okay…” he stammered, before seemingly regaining control. “My name is Fergus Crowley, you may have heard of me…”  
“Can’t say I have.” interrupted the other man, seemingly bored with the introduction and Dean couldn’t help but smirk.  
“…regardless I have heard of you, and I wish to do business with you.” Crowley continued  
“I do not have time for idle chat Mr. Crowley. State your business and I shall decide if I am interested.”  
“Okay…” Crowley seemed a little taken aback. “There is an… employee of mine… that I need to get rid of, and I would like you to do it.”  
“And what makes you think that some thug from what I am assuming is a low-life gang, would require my skills to be eradicated?”  
Dean didn’t think he’d ever heard someone insult Crowley like that. It was rather brilliant, and if it had been under different circumstances, Dean thought he might have really liked this man.  
Crowley ignored the insult and replied with an irritated tone. “He is the most well-trained of my men, exceeded only by his brother.”  
“Ahh a family affair!” the man seemed decidedly more interested now. “Would I be required to dispose of the brother as well?” he asked.  
“No. Dean must not be harmed. However be wary, he does not take kindly to threats on his little brother.”  
“Hmm…” the assassin replied “In which city is this to be taken place?”  
“Lawrence, Kansas.” Crowley responded immediately.  
“I can be there tomorrow. I will need you to provide me with this man’s name as well as his place of business, when he’s not working for you of course.”  
“His name is Sam Winchester and he works as a bartender at a place called The Roadhouse.”  
“That is all I require. I shall arrive tomorrow and your request will be carried out shortly.” the stranger paused for a moment. “In the future I would ask you not to contact me on this number. If there is something to be said, I will contact you. Now, about my payment…”  
Dean pulled away from the door. He didn’t care about the guy’s payment, he’d already heard everything he needed to hear. A hit had just been ordered on his little brother.  
The Angel. Who was this guy? Dean had certainly never heard of his before, but it was clear he was a professional. And he was going to be here tomorrow. Dean didn’t have much time to figure out his plan of attack.  
He got in his car and drove out of the compound. Even the smell of leather in his baby, his most prized possession, couldn't help calm him down. His brother was going to be murdered. Dean knew he would do anything required to stop that from happening. His entire life had been about protecting Sammy, and this would be no different. He would do what he had to, just like he always did.  
This wasn’t the first time he had made that decision. He remembered when he was 12, coming on ago 20 years now, and Sam was hungry. He was so hungry. And it was obvious too, Dean had noticed the way his brothers ribs had been far too visible to be healthy. His own were too of course, but that didn’t matter. He remembered looking at his baby brother, how his facial features were far too worn for that of an eight year old. How his clothes were much too small and covered with holes, rips, and tears. Dean remembered making a promise to himself as he had carried his baby brother across the motel room and tucked his into their shared bed. He made a promise that nothing bad would happen to his brother while he was alive. And that night, while Sam slept, Dean had snuck out of the motel and had run to the gas station down the street to get food. The night that Dean had made this promise, was also the night that he committed his first crime. He stole.  
Dean sighed, wondering what the hell he was going to do. He decided that the first thing he should do was warn Sam, tell him what was happening and then maybe somehow convince him to hunker down in Bobby’s panic room.  
Dean pulled up outside Sam’s apartment complex and let himself in with the spare key he had. Sam was lounging on the couch, watching television, with a beer in his hand.  
“Haven’t you got anything better to do Sammy?” Dean said, teasingly. Sam jumped a little at his brother’s sudden appearance, but quickly relaxed and gestured for Dean to join him on the couch.  
“I’ve been thinking about what happened yesterday Dean…” Sam started to say and Dean eyed him curiously. Sam was clearly nervous about what he was about to say and therefore Dean knew that he wasn’t going to like it. “…Crowley is not happy, I can assume that much, and instead of letting him exact his rage on us… why not just go to the police?”  
“I’m sorry, what did you just say?” Dean asked his little brother. He couldn’t believe Sam actually thought that would be the best solution.  
“Think about it Dean” Sam argued “We could give them information on Crowley and they could keep us safe from him.”  
Dean scoffed “You’re forgetting that WE are criminals too! And the police aren’t just going to forget that.”  
Sam gave an exasperated sign at his older brother’s typical stubbornness. “They would probably reduce our sentence once we tell them everything, I mean it wasn’t like we had a choice.” He tried to reason.  
“Sam, the police aren’t going to suddenly forgive the crimes I’ve committed over the last 20 ye-” Dean stopped himself halfway through his sentence. In his frustration he had forgotten that he’d never told Sam about where all their food had come from growing up.  
Sam gave him an incredulous look. “What do you mean 20 years Dean?” he asked. Dean suddenly found the floor rather interesting. “We’ve only been on Crowley’s contract for 7…” he said.  
“It’s nothing Sammy, don’t worry.” Dean stood up from the couch. “I should head home.” he stated, more to himself than to his brother.  
“Dean, you just implied that you've been committing crimes since you were 12 years old. You can’t possibly expect me to just leave it?” Sam had this look of utter determination in his eyes and Dean knew he wasn’t leaving this house without telling Sam the truth. He hadn’t wanted to tell his little brother about all the things he had done to help them survive because he knew that Sam would only feel guilty, and Dean didn’t want him feeling guilty about something that happened 20 years ago, that he could have done nothing about.  
He sighed and met his brother’s eyes. “How else was I supposed to keep you fed Sammy?” he said quietly. He was done fighting with his brother. They had fought twice in two days and that was a new record for them. Sam stood there, unmoving. Clearly in shock. Whatever he had been expecting, it wasn’t the answer he got. “Sam, we’re not going to the cops okay? So you can forget about it.” And with that Dean left. He knew that Sam would probably want to talk about his big revelation but he could deal with that later.  
Dean was still running through their argument in his head when he pulled in the driveway at his own apartment building. He sat in the impala for a few moments going through all the stress the day had brought to him. And then he realised.  
“FUCK” he shouted and slammed his fists down on the steering wheel of his baby. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” he chanted over and over. He had been so caught up in his fight with Sam he had completely forgotten about the assassin. He hadn’t even told Sam yet. In fact, the more he thought about, the more Dean realised that telling Sam might be an awful idea anyway. If Sam found out that he was about to be the next target of an assassin then he would definitely go to the police. And then they'd both be fucked.  
Dean grudgingly got out of his car and as he opened the door to his apartment, he went through all the things he knew about this “Angel” assassin. Which turned out to be literally nothing. But the guy knew about him. He had asked for Sam’s workplace, and had told Crowley that he would arrive tomorrow so it was logical to assume that he would be going to visit Sam at The Roadhouse tomorrow night.  
And that was when Dean decided that perhaps he should visit his brother tomorrow night as well. If he could figure out who the assassin was, then he could kill him before he got to Sam.


	2. The Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean find out all he can about the assassin thats after his brother.

Having made his mind up, Dean hurried to get his phone out and call his best friend Charlie. She was a fucking amazing hacker and he needed to know more about this guy. Having nothing but “The Angel” to go on certainly wasn’t going to be enough.  
She picked up after the second ring. “Dean-o” She said “how are you, kid? I missed my hand-maiden the other day you know!”  
Dean chuckled. He’d had to miss out on his Live Action Role Playing with her because of the preparation for the drug run they had just done. You know, the one that fucked everything up. But Charlie was one of the only people who knew about the Winchester’s contract with Crowley, so she knew it couldn’t have been helped and she was by no means bitter.  
“And I missed my queen.” He said regally.  
“Damn right you did, bitch.” she replied. Dean smiled, this was one of the reasons he loved Charlie so much, she was just so easy to talk to. Completely platonic love, she wasn’t interested in him, or anyone with a penis for that matter.  
“Char, I need to ask you for a favour.” he said, remembering why he had called in the first place.  
He immediately had her full attention. Dean didn’t like asking for help and she knew that if he was, then it was for something really serious.  
“No worries Dean, What can I do?”  
“I need you to do some research on someone for me.”  
“Got a name.” she asked.  
“He’s an assassin that goes by the name The Angel. That’s all I know and I really, really need to know more.” Dean knew that Charlie wouldn’t ask questions, she trusted Dean’s capability.  
“It’ll be tough, but I am the queen, so not impossible.”  
He laughed at her attempt to lighten up the situation. “Thanks Char, just call me back when you've got something.”  
“Sure thing Dean-o, talk soon.” and as he hung up Dean thought he could already hear her fingers on the keyboard.  
Dean walked back to the impala to grab his duffle bag from the fake bottom in the boot. John had gotten it installed to hide all his weapons for hunting his wife’s “killer”. Dean hadn’t cleaned it out, thinking that it might have come in handy for the work Crowley had them doing. So now, he carried the equivalent of a small arsenal in the back of his car. But tonight he only wanted one thing. His gun, The Colt. It had been his father’s gun and Dean had gotten it seven years ago when he had died. It was a little bit old fashioned, it had a long thin barrel and Latin carvings on the handle. Dean figured he could give it a nice clean as it might actually be getting some use soon.  
So Dean took his time taking the gun apart, cleaning it, and then putting it back together again. And by the time the he was absolutely satisfied with it, it had taken him about 2 hours, so he knew that it wouldn’t be long before Charlie called back. He went into the kitchen to fetch himself a beer and then decided he would need something a little stronger. The day had been way too fucking stressful for anything less than whiskey.  
By the time he’d had finished his first glass, his phone was ringing.  
“What have you got Charlie?” he asked straight away.  
“Dean…” oh fuck she sounds worried, He thought. “Fuck man, I’ve got practically nothing. This guy is a ghost.”  
Dean groaned, that was just what he needed, to go into this without any background knowledge. “Just tell me what you do have.”  
“Okay…Well, like you already know, he goes by the title “The Angel” and it’s likely that he got this name because, he’s thought to be the last surviving member of a cult known as The Angels.”  
“What do you know about this cult?” he asked her.  
“Not a whole lot, just that they were all originally from Russia, everyone there was fluent in both English and Russian, and they were known for being really religious, really strict, and really, really violent. It went belly up about 10 years ago, after one of the leaders went nuts and killed practically everyone.”  
“Wow… that’s intense.” Dean was a little taken aback. That was some fucked up shit.  
“Yeah, I know. And it was only about a month after that massacre that your guy popped up. It looks like he’s had a few high profile targets, he’s on the FBI’s most wanted but they’ll never get him, they don’t know his real name, or even what he looks like.”  
“Fuck” Dean pored himself another whisky. “So there would be no real way to identify him?”  
“Dean, everything I can tell you about him comes from what I found out about this cult, and it’s not even confirmed that he was from there so…”  
“I get that Charlie, but there has to be some way of confirming it’s him.”  
She sighed. “There is one thing… The cult members were ranked within the group, similar to the way real angels are, judging from the fact that your guy ended up being an assassin, I’m going to wager that he was one of the soldiers, a seraph maybe.”  
“How will that help me recognise him?” He asked, that was all he really needed, he wouldn’t want to accidentally kill the wrong person.  
“High ranking members of the group has a pair of wings tattooed on their backs, which also indicated which position they held. It was an honour to be given your wings, but based on his skill, I’d say, one that was bestowed on your guy.”  
“So angel wings tattooed on his back?” Dean asked. “That’s my best bet?”  
“Yeah it is…” she hesitated for a minute. “…Dean, this guy is really, really dangerous. I mean, no one’s ever even seen him. Whatever you're going to do, please for the love of god, be careful.”  
“I get that Char, I will.”  
“Promise? I still need my hand-maiden.”  
Dean huffed a laugh. “Yeah I promise. I’ve gotta go Charlie, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”  
“Okay, bye Dean”  
After they hung up, Dean threw back another whiskey and ran his hands though his hair.  
What the fuck had be gotten himself into?

 

…

 

Dean woke up in a shitty mood. It was Monday, so he had work and then along with that he was also planning a murder tonight. So he thought his foul mood was justified. He fixed himself a coffee, black of course and then headed to the garage.  
Unfortunately his crappy mood didn’t wear off at all throughout the day, and it seemed to be pissing Bobby off as much as it was him. Dean was dropping tools, he was screwing up orders, he was zoning out and losing focus, and he was also snapping at practically everyone who spoke to him. At lunchtime, during his break Bobby came and sat down with him. Bobby might have been Dean’s boss, but he was also family, to be perfectly honest, both Sam and Dean considered him more of a father than John. So when Bobby sat down with him, Dean knew it was because he was worried about his awful behaviour.  
“Son, what the hell’s the matter with you today?” Dean couldn’t help but chuckle at Bobby expressing his concern the on way an old coot like him could. “Don’t laugh at me boy, I know something’s up.”  
Dean signed, he knew Bobby wasn’t going to give up without making sure Dean was okay, and Dean obviously couldn’t tell him that he was going to be committing a murder in just a matter of hours, so he opted for a safer and confirmable story. “Sam and I had a fight last night.” Bobby’s eyes softened immediately, he knew Dean couldn’t stand fighting with his brother, they didn’t do it often though so that was good.  
“What about?” and of course that vague answer wasn’t enough for Bobby. Dean hesitated, unsure of what to say. When they had started their contract with Crowley, both Sam and Dean had agreed not to tell Bobby. Dean always felt bad for lying, but Bobby already hated John for being neglectful towards the boys —who he considers to be his own sons— and informing him of a drug debt wouldn’t have done anything but cause unwanted tension. So telling Bobby the real reason for the fight was not an option.  
“He found out that I used to steal our food when we were kids.” Dean didn’t have to worry about talking to Bobby about this. He knew. It was the reason that he hated John so much. Bobby had tried to gain custody over Sam and Dean a few times when they were kids, thinking John to be neglectful and abusive. He had been of course, but Bobby could never get the case to stick, so he had just had to sit back and watch and John Winchester ruined his sons.  
“Oh…” Bobby understood that Dean was never going to apologise for the things he had done for Sam so there wasn’t much he could say. “Did he find out about what happened with Michael…?”  
Dean’s head shot up and he met Bobby’s eyes in a panic. “No. And he never will, right Bobby?” Dean looked at his surrogate father with conviction.  
Bobby, who was one of the most stubborn people Dean had ever met, backed down immediately at the look that Dean gave him. “Right” was all the old man could muster as a reply. Dean signed and pushed his lunch away from him and across the table, he had suddenly lost his appetite. Bobby knew about that whole situation only because he had been the one who found Dean lying, bruised and in a pile of his own blood and vomit, after his father had caught him in bed with another guy. Sam didn’t know about it and if Dean had any say, he never would.  
“Don’t worry about it Bobby, I think I’ll go talk things out with Sam tonight. Now my lunch break is technically over so I’m gonna get back to work.”  
Bobby knew he had said all he could without pushing Dean too far, so he backed off and for the rest of the day Dean worked uninterrupted and in absolute silence. Except for when he could he heard softly humming Metallica. 

 

…

 

Dean got home from work at about 6 o’clock that night. Sam’s shift goes from 5 until 12 so he had plenty of time. He thought he would try to get to the Roadhouse at about 9, it wasn’t too early but it also wasn’t too late so it gave him time to find this guy and figure out a plan of attack before it was too late.  
Dean had a shower in a desperate attempt to get all the grease from the shop off his skin and then he headed into his bedroom closet willing himself to be able to find the perfect outfit. He needed to make a good impression on this guy so he wasn’t allowed to look like a total bum.  
He decided on his tightest pair of black jeans that he knew made his ass look amazing, and the dark red shirt that everyone always said brought out the green in his eyes. He went into the bathroom, he brushed his teeth and he spiked up his hair just ever so slightly. He didn’t usually put in this much effort when he went down to The Roadhouse but he was more nervous than he would like to admit. Not just because he was about to meet a very deadly assassin, but also because this would be the first time he had spoken with Sam since they'd had their fight, and a large part of his thought Sam might not want to talk to him and ask him to leave before he’d identified the guy.  
His nerves meant it took him much longer than usual to get ready and buy the time he was done, it was already 8:30. So he shrugged on his jacket and headed off to the bar.  
When he arrived it was a lot busier than it should have been for a Monday night, although Dean had had one of the worst days he could ever remember having do he kind of understood the appeal. When he walked inside he looked around, he could see his friend Benny flirting with Jo over on one side of the room. Benny’s think southern accent could be heard filling the room, he had always been a loud drunk. Dean couldn’t help but laugh at the fact that after all this time, he still thought he might have a chance with Jo. Deciding he didn’t need to see anymore of his friend making a fool of himself, Dean turned his attention back to his search for Sam and the Angel assassin.  
He spotted Sam behind the bar on the other side of the place from Benny and Jo. He was absorbed in mixing the drinks, he’d gotten quite good at it and if Dean was being honest he really liked watching him do it. Dean started to walk towards his brother when he realised that Sam was talking to someone, Dean couldn’t see the man’s face but he was definitely the only guy in the whole place that was alone and paying any sort of attention to the bartender. Luckily enough the only free seats at the bar also happened to be next to this guy so Dean strutted up to the bar and sat down next to the stranger.  
“Heya Sammy.” he called out. “How’s my little brother?” he asked with a smirk playing on his features. The guy turned a little, obviously paying attention to Dean but trying not to look like he was.  
Sam rolled his eyes. “It’s Sam.” he said “and I’m not exactly little Dean.”  
Dean huffed a laugh. “Yeah whatever you say Sammy. I’ll have whatever whiskey you've got, on the rocks.”  
“I know what you’ll have Dean.” his brother replied with another roll of his eyes.  
Dean wasn’t too sure how to include the dark haired man next to him into the conversation, but he knew that he had to. “How’s your shift been so far Sammy?”  
Sam handed Dean his drink as he replied “Pretty good, I was just talking to Castiel here before you arrived.” Sam gestured to the man nest to Dean. Oh thank god, Sam did it for me, Dean though.  
“Castiel huh?” he turned to the man in the trench coat beside him. “Hope the Sasquatch here has been treating you well.”  
The man furrowed his brow and tilted his head in confusion, which Dean did not find cute in any way, shape, or form. “I don’t understand.” he stated simply.  
“Sasquatch… you know because…of his size…” Dean gestured to his brother but the guy didn’t seem to get it, “…never mind” He stuck out his hand. “I’m Dean” he said.  
“My name is Castiel” he said as he shook Dean’s hand.  
Dean quirked a smile, “I know, Sam said.” Dean laughed at the way the stranger blushed. “What kind of a name is Castiel anyway?” he asked.  
“Dean!” Sam exclaimed. “Don’t be rude.”  
Before Dean could reply, Castiel interrupted. “It’s fine Sam, really.” he turned his attention back to Dean, “It is the name of an angel from the Christian faith.” He stated, very matter-of-factly. Literally named after an angel, Dean thought. It had to be this guy.  
Dean was silent for a moment before something clicked in his memory. “Oh hey, Castiel as in the Angel of Thursday?” he asked. The angel gave Dean a disbelieving look, as did his brother. Dean gave a sheepish smile, “mum used to like angels…” he said quietly.  
Sam raised his eyebrows, “She did? I didn’t know that.” Yeah, well there’s a lot you don’t know about mum Sammy He thought. But he didn’t say it, it wasn’t Sam fault that she’d died when he was just a baby.  
Dean attempted to change the topic back to the other man. “So Cas, what brings you to little ol’ Lawrence?” he asked. Cas? Where had that come from? Oh well, Cas didn’t seem to mind. When Castiel went to answer he looked up and their eyes met for the first time. Dean was stunned at the clear, bright clue that stared back at him. The guy had the most beautiful blue eyes. Dean studied his face, he took in the man’s angular jaw line that was covered in a small about of dark stubble, and his messy hair which was very dark in contrast to the colour of his eyes. He was really, really good looking, Dean decided.  
“I was just passing though and I thought stop for a drink. Maybe stay a few days.”  
And with that the three men began talking about anything and everything. Sam asked about Dean’s day at the garage and Dean asked Sam about the kids he’d been tutoring, and all the while Cas asked them questions about their lives and contributed when he could. Dean tried to be wary though, deliberately not dropping anything really important about their lives, just in case Cas actually was the assassin, he still had to find a way to check for the tattoos and he had no idea how to do that. Before any of them realised, it was 11:30 and the bar was doing it’s last call. Dean didn’t want to go home yet, he wanted to spend more time with Castiel, god help him he was actually enjoying himself. God the man was gorgeous, Dean couldn’t stop thinking about what it would be like to run his hands over… no Dean scolded himself for the inappropriate thought. He looked over at Cas, and he couldn’t stop his eyes from darting down to the smaller mans lips, god what he would give to know what they would feel like on his own. oh fuck it Dean thought, he had to get this guy alone and shirtless to look for the tattoo anyway, so he figured he might as well have a little fun with it.  
“So Cas, do you have anywhere to stay tonight?” he asked, with a sly smile.  
“I was just going to check into the motel in town.” he replied.  
At this point Sam joined in. “ooh motel beds are awful, Dean and I would know we practically grew up in them, good luck with that.”  
Cas did that confused head tilting thing again and Dean still absolutely did not find it adorable. He seemed genuinely surprised at this news, as if he’d never actually slept in a motel room before. Dean smirked, he could totally use that to his advantage.  
“Sam’s right.” he said, pulling Castiel’s attention over to him, “Man, I think the fold out couch at my apartment would be more comfortable.”  
Sam instantly realised what Dean was doing and gave him what Dean liked to call Bitchface #27.  
“In fact, why don't you just stay with me while you're in town? I’ve got room.” Sam sighed and shook his head at his brother’s inability to keep it in his pants. If only he knew Dean thought satirically.  
“That’s very kind of you Dean, but I don’t wish to impose…” he began to refuse the offer.  
“Its fine Cas, it’s not like you're going to kill me or anything.” He said with a smile.


	3. The Job

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Cas meets Dean and then goes home with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's play a game called 'Can you spot the Sherlock Reference?' (there will be more)
> 
> Also a little Aerosmith there for my friend when she reads it ;)

Castiel stood outside The Roadhouse. This was the bar he had been directed to. Sam Winchester was the name of his target. Castiel had decided about 5 minutes after arriving in this small town that he didn’t wish to stay any longer than necessary. If all went well, Sam Winchester would be dead by the end of the night.  
Castiel knew that he probably shouldn’t have taken the case, but the idea of the two brothers had intrigued him. Crowley had made then out to seem very dangerous and had warned him to be extremely wary of the older one, Dean his name was. Castiel wondered where they had obtained such a high level of skill, especially if they had only been working fro Crowley for 7 years. He wasn’t too worried though, he was yet to meet someone who could match his level of skill. That’s what he got from being trained as a solider from the minute he was born. Growing up, he had always know he would be a killer, it was what the superiors at The Angel’s had decreed. However when the cult that he had once called home had crumbled, Castiel was left with abilities that were unhelpful in practically every way. He lacked to social skills to make friends, or even hold down a job, and therefore he decided his best option was to become an assassin, where he could utilise the skills he had been given. Because if you're good at something you should never do it for free.  
Castiel walked inside the establishment, he immediately noticed the two bar tenders. One was a petite blonde women, so he logically assumed that she was not Sam Winchester. The other was an extremely, almost intimidatingly so, tall man. He was very well built and Castiel did not find it difficult to picture him as a highly trained criminal.  
Having decided that this man was almost certainly his target, the assassin approached the bar. He sat down in front of the man.  
“Hey man, what can I get you?” the bartender asked with a wide smile. Castiel noticed that he was quite attractive. Not really the smaller mans type, but he still appreciated a handsome face.  
“Vodka.” he said. “Lots of it.” Castiel liked to drink, but he didn’t do it very often. Not because he was a lightweight, in fact completely the opposite, he had a higher tolerance for alcohol than anyone he had ever met. He knew that alcohol helped him loosen up a little bit, and he knew that he was going to be required to speak to his target for a large portion of the night so he figured why not. Plus it was bar so it was customary to actually order a drink.  
The man he assumed was Sam chuckled and poured him three shots of straight vodka. “Will that do?” he asked.  
“For now.” Was the dark haired man’s reply as he threw back each of the shots in quick succession, with very little effort.  
Sam mouth was agape in awe “That was… I have never seen anyone do that before.”  
Castiel shrugged. “My family was from Russia.” he said. “I believe it is in my blood.”  
The taller man laughed. “I’m Sam, by the way.” he said, introducing himself with a smile. Ahh good, I was correct in my assumption Castiel praised himself before extending his hand to shake the other mans and to induce himself as well.  
“I am Castiel.” Sam seemed to pause and think for a moment, Castiel assumed it was because of the bizarre nature of his name. He got that reaction from most people. And with that, the assassin asked his target to pour them both a drink.  
“So I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before, are you just passing through?” Sam asked politely.  
“Yes, It seems like a lovely town, how long have you lived here?” he was subtly tried to get information about the lives of both of the brothers to make his job much easier.  
“I was born here.” Replied Sam.  
Castiel’s eyebrows shot up. Did people really never leave one place in their lives? He himself disliked staying in one place for very long at all. “So you’ve lived here your whole life?”  
“Nah, my dad moved as around a lot growing up, but my brother always wanted to come back here so as soon as we were old enough, we did.” Good, he brought up his brother Castiel was pleased he now had an opportunity to ask about the older Winchester.  
“You have a brother?” he asked.  
“Yeah. Older. His names Dean.” the bartender paused for a moment. “Speak of the devil, I think thats him coming this way now.” And with that another man sat himself down on the bar stool next to Castiel.  
“Heya Sammy.” the man said “How’s my little brother?”  
Castiel watched as Sam rolled his eyes. “It’s Sam.” he said “and I’m not exactly little Dean.”  
Dean huffed a laugh. “Yeah whatever you say Sammy. I’ll have whatever whiskey you've got, on the rocks.”  
“I know what you’ll have Dean.” his brother replied with another roll of his eyes.  
They had a familiarity that Castiel could sense immediately. It was evident that the brother were very close, perhaps that was why Crowley believed that Dean posed any significant threat.  
Castiel was trying to find a polite way to include himself in the conversation when Dean began to speak once again. “How’s your shift been so far Sammy?”  
Sam handed Dean his drink as he replied “Pretty good, I was just talking to Castiel here before you arrived.” Sam gestured to him and Castiel was grateful that he didn’t have to make himself seem rude by interrupting.  
“Castiel huh?” the taller man turned to face him and his eyes raked over Castiel’s trench coat.. “Hope the Sasquatch here has been treating you well.”  
Castiel knew that he had squinted and tilted his head in confusion, what business did a Sasquatch have in a Bar? “I don’t understand.” he stated simply.  
“Sasquatch… you know because…of his size…” Dean gestured to his brother but Castiel still didn’t see the significance in the reference to big foot, “…never mind” Dean stuck out his hand. “I’m Dean” he said.  
“My name is Castiel” he said as he shook Dean’s hand.  
Dean quirked a smile, “I know, Sam said.” Castiel felt himself blush and Dean laughed. Castiel would totally deny noticing that he had a very beautiful laugh. “What kind of a name is Castiel anyway?” he asked.  
“Dean!” Sam interrupted him reply. “Don’t be rude.”  
Before Dean could reply, Castiel responded to the original question. “It’s fine Sam, really.” he turned his attention back to Dean, “It is the name of an angel from the Christian faith.” He stated, very matter-of-factly.  
Dean was silent for a moment, similar to how his brother had been when he discovered the shorter mans name. Then he responded as though something had suddenly clicked in his memory. “oh hey, Castiel as in the Angel of Thursday?” he asked. He knew that he must have been giving Dean the same disbelieving look that his brother was, when Dean gave a sheepish smile, “mum used to like angels…” he said quietly.  
Sam raised his eyebrows, “She did? I didn’t know that.” Castiel wondered why Dean seemed to remember more of their mother than Sam did, remembering the way Sam had only mentioned his brother and father when he spoke of his childhood Castiel realised that their mother must have died a long time ago.  
Dean’s attempt to change the topic was rather obvious as he retuned his attention to Castiel. “So Cas, what brings you to little ol’ Lawrence?” he asked. Cas? The only nickname Castiel had ever been called was Cassie, by his brother Gabriel. Cas jolted himself away from that thought, it was not something he liked to think about. He decided he rather liked the name Cas though. When Castiel went to answer he looked up and his eyes met Dean's for the first time.  
The man had stunning green eyes. Quite different from his brothers darker ones. But breathtaking, and only enhanced by the dark red shirt he was wearing. Castiel found himself wondering if that was just a coincidence or something the taller man had planned. Dean was just as built as his brother but Castiel found his much more attractive. His features were masculine, yet strangely delicate and Castiel found dimly absolutely fascinated by him.  
So the men spent the following hours discussing nothing of great importance. Although Castiel did find out more about both Winchester boys. He discovered that Dean was a mechanic, and somehow he felt as though the job suited Dean perfectly. Over the course of the night he found himself inquiring about Dean more than Sam, who was actually his target. But he couldn’t seem to help himself. The more he found out about Dean, the more he wanted to know. He could already feel this becoming about more than the job. It was concerning and Castiel knew he had to snap out of that fatal mentality. So naturally, when Dean offered for Castiel to stay at his apartment, Castiel told himself that it was in order to get closer to Sam, although he really knew that wasn’t quite true.

 

“We should get going then.” Dean said. “Gotta set up the pull out for you Cas.” Castiel found the nickname growing on him more and more very time Dean spoke it.  
“Are you alright to drive?” Sam asked his brother. The obvious concern in the younger Winchester’s voice was heartwarming to Castiel.  
Dean scoffed, “Do you really think I would go anywhere near Baby if I wasn’t?”  
Sam rolled his eyes, and when he caught Castiel’s confused look, he graciously explained. “Baby is Dean’s car, of which he has an unhealthy attachment to.” he said with obvious teasing.  
Dean placed his hand on Cas’ shoulder and he found himself strangely happy for it. “You understand when you see it Cas.” He said, sending a glare in his brothers direction. “Let’s go.” He said as he started to get up form the bar.  
As they walked out, he heard Sam call out to them one last time. “Make sure you come back and see me again before you leave Cas.”  
Reminded of the reason he was here in the first place. “Of course I will Sam.” he called out over his shoulder.  
As Cas and Dean walked to Dean’s car, they walked much closer than Castiel expected them to. With their arms brushing up against each other, Cas felt his heart beat speed up as he realised how much he enjoyed such a small touch from the gorgeous man beside him.  
“So here she is.” Dean exclaimed. Castiel didn’t understand.  
“There is no one here Dean.” he stated simply.  
Dean gave him a disbelieving look and an exasperated sigh, “Baby, Cas. This is Baby.” Dean motioned with his hands towards the well kept black vehicle next to him. Cas didn’t know much about Cars but he did know a beautiful car when he saw it. And somehow, looking at it, Cas decided that the car was perfect for Dean. Having seen it, Cas couldn’t picture Dean having any other car.  
“She is very beautiful dean.” He said, running his hand along the roof. Dean positively beamed as Cas’ reaction and chivalrously opened the passenger door and gestured for Cas to get in.  
Cas shivered as he felt Dean brush up against him as he got into the car.  
The car ride was relatively silent. But it was a comfortable silence. And soon Dean felt comfortable enough to start humming the tune that was playing on the radio. It was a rock song, with a pretty great guitar instrumental. Castiel didn’t really know much about music, he just hadn’t been exposed to it when he was growing up.  
“What is this music?” He asked Dean.  
Dean just gave him a look. “This is Aerosmith.” he said. Cas didn’t respond. Dean looked at him wide eyed. “come on , you've gotta know Aerosmith…” Cas just stared at him blankly. “Oh wow man. Okay we’re gonna crank it up and you've gotta like it.”  
Cas just nodded his assent as Dean turned up the volume dial on the speaker. The sound of a man voice rang out though the car. “Steven Tyler.” Dean told him, and he assumed Dean was referring to the man singing. “His daughter plays Arwen in Lord of The Rings.” Dean continued. Again, Cas just stared blankly. “Come on dude, you haven't seen Lord of The Rings?”  
Cas bowed his head “No I haven’t. Are they movies?”  
Dean snorted. “well we are definitely watching those before you leave.” Cas couldn’t help the feeling in his stomach at the thought that Dean actually wanted to spend time with him.  
Apparently the chorus was too good to talk through, because Dean suddenly turned the volume up once again, and this time he began singing along and almost head banging to the tune to the music.  
“Freak out! I’m alone now! I feel just like I’m loosing my mind!”  
Cas laughed and looked up at Dean. Dean smiled widely and met Cas’s eyes. He kept singing.  
“Because love is like the right dress, on the wrong girl. You never know what you're going to find.”  
Cas felt an unfamiliar pull in his chest. He identified it as sentiment. He’d always thought sentiment was a chemical defect found on the loosing side, and yet here he was, letting the brother of his target right though his defences.  
“You think you're high and fine as wine, then you wind up like a dog in a ditch. Because love is like a wrong turn on a cold night. Ain’t that a bitch!”  
Cas couldn’t help but grin even wider as Dean scrunched up his face to sing the more intense notes. he listened to the duration of the song and by the time the chorus had played a second time, Cas had learnt the words. Dean kept singing.  
“Then you feel so out of place, Licking up the arsenic from the same old lace. You know the stuff is poison but you've got to have a taste!”  
And then the chorus played for a third time and Dean let out a surprised laugh at the fact that Cas started singing along with him. Castiel felt at ease. Much more so than he could remember being in a very long time.  
By the end of the song both Dean and Cas were laughing and grinning at each other with a twinkle in both their eyes. “I’m going to take it you liked that one Cas?” Dean asked.  
Cas rolled his eyes at the obvious question. “Yes Dean I did, You’ll have to show me more.” he suggested.  
Dean practically lit up at the suggestion. “We’ll have to save that for later.” He said as he pulled the Impala into the driveway of what Castiel assumed was his apartment.  
“Home sweet home.” Dean said with a wink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lets be honest, it wasn't that hard to find. 
> 
> Also sorry if the whole Aerosmith thing annoyed you, it was kinda a subtle gift to my friend. 
> 
> Also there was a batman reference there too, because we all know how much Dean loves batman.


	4. The Best night of Dean Winchester's life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay smut!!

Dean stepped out of his black beauty, and walked up to his front door with Cas following in hot pursuit. He had been a little worried that he’d embarrassed himself in that car ride, but luckily Cas had seemed to enjoy himself. Dean wasn’t sure where all that had come from. He didn’t sing in front of people if he could help it, but he had just gotten so caught up with the way Cas had been smiling at him that he’d decided to put on a little show. Also, it was probably partly to do with the alcohol he'd had before.   
The guy was fucking gorgeous. Every time Dean looked at him all Dean wanted to do was strip him of his fucking trench coat and suit, maybe leave the tie on, and just take him right then and there. Apart from being mind numbingly sexy, he was also undeniably adorable. Dean couldn’t get over the way he did that cute little head tilt when he didn’t understand a reference. The way he squinted his eyes when Dean made a pop culture reference that he didn’t understand, which was a lot. Like seriously, the guy hadn’t even seen Lord of The Rings. Dean was going to have fun showing him that one, and he was going to show him. Dean was always looking for an excuse to geek out with anyone.  
He opened his front door and led Cas into the house. “so this is it.” He said as he flicked the lights on. “It’s not much, but it does the job.”  
Cas huffed a laugh, “Thank you for allowing me to stay with you Dean, I hope I shall not be much of an inconvenience.”  
Dean waved off his comment. “It’s nothing man. Hey, do you want a drink? A beer maybe?”  
Castiel nodded. “If you're going to have one then yes.”  
Dean told Cas to put his bag in the living room and then make himself comfortable on the couch. While he was in the kitchen pulling their beers out from the fridge, Dean reminded himself of just who he was dealing with. There was a potential trained killer sitting in his home. And he really needed to confirm that. As soon as he possibly could. And so he told himself that he reason he was about to tear that beautiful man’s clothes was to see if he possessed an angelic tattoo of sorts. Whether or not that was actually the truth, is a completely different story.  
He walked back into the lounge room and took in the sight of Castiel on his couch. He smiled at the ease he felt at the image of domesticity. Cas noticed his presence and gave him a shy smile as he walked around the couch. “Cas, theres actually something I want to do before I give you think drink.” He said as he placed the two beers down on the table. Cas did the head tilting thing again and Dean’s stomach flipped. “I’ve been thinking about it for a while now.” He said as he took a step closer to the shorter man. They were only inches apart now and Cas’ gaze darted down to Deans lips. Using that as initiative, Dean reached down and pulled Cas into a soft and gentle kiss. He waited a little bit before deepening it, almost as if giving Castiel a chance to pouch away. When no such indication arose Dean started kissing the blue eyed man with much more intensity. His tongue traced over Cas’ bottom lip and Castiel opened his mouth to let Dean in with an eagerness that would have made Dean chuckle if he had not been currently occupied. This time it was Cas who furthered the kiss and while their tongues explored each others mouths, Cas started roaming his hands up Deans body. With one hand behind Dean’s neck giving support to their kiss, Cas began to trail his fingers underneath Dean’s shirt. Suddenly they were wear far to many clothes for Dean’s liking.  
He pulled back from the kiss, he took in Castiel disheveled appearance and was slightly proud of himself for being the reason behind that look. If Cas looked like that, he could only image what he looked like, so he got straight to the point before Cas could protest his draw back. “bedroom now.”  
Cas seemed totally on board with this idea as he let Dean lead him to the master bedroom, not even attempting to hide his blatant staring at Dean’s ass. As soon as the door to the bed room had closed, Cas practically slammed Dean up against it, once again exploring his mouth with a renewed desire. The intensity had Dean moaning into the smaller mans mouth as Cas worked off his shirt.  
They slowly and yet passionately made their way to the bed, pulling each others clothes off along the way. By some sort of unspoken agreement, Cas was the one in change here. It wasn’t the way Dean was used to doing things but he certainly wasn’t going to object to it. Cas was above Dean, they were both wearing only their underwear now and Cas was mouthing Dean’s erection through his boxers. The friction was only light but it had a stain of pre come appearing through the thin fabric.  
“Cas… I need more…” Dean gasped as he slowly rocked his hips up towards Cas’ mouth in a desperate attempt for more.  
Cas slowly worked his boxers off until he was lying completely naked beneath him. Dean could feel Cas’ hot breath ghosting over his erection and he shuddered with anticipation. And he absolutely did not whine when Cas started sucking a bruise on the inside of his thigh rather than filling his mouth with Dean’s cock. Dean was about to protest when Cas spoke.  
“Do you think you deserve it Dean?” he murmured and Dean shivered at his low, gravelly voice. “I think you're going to have to prove how much you want me Dean.”  
Dean couldn’t help but moan at the implications behind Cas’ words. “Anything Cas… I’ll do anything… just… fuck please Cas.” Dean knew he was already gone and they had barely started.  
“Turn over. Get on your hands and knees.” he commanded. And Dean, who was usually adverse to taking orders, shivered at the tone of his lovers voice and saw absolutely no reason to argue.  
Cas growled at the sight of Dean on his hands and knees before him. He reached out and grabbed Deans ass as he whispered in Deans ear, “You look so good like this Dean. has anyone ever told you how good you look splayed out like this? Your ass ready for the taking.” Dean whimpered. No, no one had ever told him that, quite possibly because he hadn’t bottomed in a very long time, not since Michael in fact, but with Cas, it somehow felt right.  
“Lube’s in the top draw.” Dean said with a breathless whisper, hopping that Cas would take the hint and get this show on the road.  
He chucked. “So eager Dean.” He murmured as he rummaged thought the draw looking of it. Dean heard the bottle cap click open. A few seconds later, he felt Cas’ slick fingers teasing at him rim. He gasped and pushed back ever so slightly, needing to feel more. Ever so slowly, Cas teased one finger inside of him. It felt a little strange, but not unpleasant and Dean tried to stay relaxed as Cas working in his second finger. It started to feel better now and by the time Cas added a third finger Dean was panted loudly, suddenly Cas crooked his fingers and Dean moaned as the sudden pressure on his prostate, caused an immense pleasure to ripple through my body.  
“oh my god Cas! Please… I’m ready.” He needed Cas inside him, like yesterday.  
“Dean, do you have a condom?” Cas asked. fuck he didn’t.  
“I’m clean Cas.”  
“As am I.”  
Dean cantered his hips a little bit as to grab Castiel’s attention. “Then lets get on with it.” He declared. Cas chuckled and went to position himself behind Dean, when suddenly Dean had a thought. “Wait a second Cas.” Castiel stilled immediately, but Dean spoke again before he could fully move away. Looking over his shoulder, he looked at Cas with pleading eyes. “I wanna see you when we do this.” he said.  
Cas smiled softly and positioned Dean so that he was lying on his back underneath him, caressing Dean with his hands any mouth as line lined his cock up with Dean stretched hole. Cas attached his mouth to Dean’s neck and Dean’s hands intwined with his hair as Cas lathered himself up with lube and slowly pushed in. Dean felt the stretch and burn, not a painful burn though, a good burn. And when Cas finally bottomed out, he felt more full than he ever had in his life. He had never felt so connected to a single person before. Castiel’s body was pressed so close to his, every inch of them was touching, it was more intimate than Dean had ever been before and he loved it.  
“Cas… You can move… I’m good.” he breathed out.  
Cas kissed him but still didn’t move.  
“Seriously Cas. Move!” He exclaimed and Cas finally did. Dean sucked in a breath as Cas pulled almost all the way out and then he let is back out again as a moan when Cas thrust all the way back in. And from there they set up a rhythm. It was a slow rhythm and it felt amazing, but soon Dean found he needed more.  
“Cas… harder…please” Dean’s hands had travelled around Cas’ back and he knew he was leaving scratches down Castiel’s toned, muscular back.  
Cas seemed determined to set the pace though, so while he did speed up, it wasn’t nearly enough and pretty soon Dean was reduced to a writhing, sobbing, begging mess.  
“fuck Cas… Please I need it.” Cas practically growled at Dean’s shameless begging. “I need more Cas… fuck me please” Cas pulled out almost all the way before repositioning Dean ever so slightly and then thrusting back in. Much harder than before. Dean moaned at the new angle as it had Castiel’s cock nailing his prostate with each hard thrust. Dean found himself thrusting his hips up ever so slightly, matching Castiel’s quick pace.  
Words were not needed. The only sounds in the room were of panting and moaning from both of the men, as well as the unmistakable sound of skin slapping against skin. Dean knew his fingernails were digging into Cas’ skin but he didn’t care, and Cas showed no signs of caring either so he didn’t stop. Cas was kissing him, his tongue moving in Deans mouth to the same rhythm as his thrusts and Dean couldn’t help but be awed at the intense synchronisation. It felt like they had been doing his for years, that they were perfectly in tuned with each others desires.  
Cas’ body was pressed against his and the slight friction of Dean’s untouched cock rubbing against Castiel’s stomach had him grinding upwards slight, desperately seeking more. As if understanding his movements perfectly, Cas reached down and wrapped his hand around Dean hard length. Dean moaned and arched his back at the touch. Cas used the pre come dripping from Deans cock as lube as he gently sped up his movement until they were also in time with his thrusts.  
It was much too intense for Dean, who could feel his eyes beginning to water, but fuck if he didn’t love it. It was honestly the greatest sex he had ever had, and he hadn’t even come yet.  
“Cas…fuck Cas… I need to come…please.” He begged. He could feel the pressure building up within him and need to come soon was overpowering.  
Cas seemed to understand this and sped up ever further, pounding into Dean with absolutely no inhibitions and Dean came. It was blinding. His vision blurred for a moment and he knew that as the muscles in his body seized with pleasure, he had wrapped his arms around Cas and pulled him even closer.  
Cas kept thrusting into Dean as he rode out his orgasm, but pretty soon the pressure of Dean clenching around him had his thrusts jolted and he came inside Dean with a cry.  
“Fuck Dean!!” The intensity of his of orgasm caused him to collapse on top of Dean, panting manically.  
They stayed like that for a few moment, both of the men coming down from their ridiculous high, until Dean spoke again. “Cas… you're pretty heavy you know…” he said with a laugh.  
Cas chuckled and moved slightly, so he was still lying on top of him but his weight was no longer being fully supported by Dean chest.  
Dean wrapped him arm around Cas’ waist and pulled him closer. Cas smiled and they lay there like that for a moment until Cas announced that he was going to go to the bathroom and fetch a washcloth to clean up the come from Deans stomach and chest. Dean was grateful because he honestly didn’t think he could get up just yet.  
He was unashamed as he stared at Castiel’s ass as he walked into the other room. But then something caught him eye. A tattoo. A massively beautiful tattoo of angel wing that swept across the entirety of Cas’ back and suddenly Dean was reminded of the reason Cas was here.  
The tattoo was confirmation and Dean needed to kill him.  
All while the gears were turning in Deans head, Cas had gotten the cloth and returned. He tentatively cleaned up Dean with a shy smile and Dean felt his heart sink just a little bit. He really liked Cas. And they had great sex which was a bonus. Suddenly he was feeling a little bit more conflicted about killing the dark haired man.  
While Cas cleaned him up, Dean noticed another tattoo. This one was situated just above Castiel’s prominent hip bones. Which, by the way, were really fucking sexy. It was writing but it wasn’t in English. As Cas key down next to him, Dean traced him fingers over the dark images.  
“What do they mean?” he asked.  
Cas looked down at the tattoos Dean was gesturing to. He didn't respond for a moment and Dean was about to tell him not to worry about it, when he finally replied.  
“It is Enochian.” He said.  
“What? The language?” Dean asked, he’d never heard of it before.  
“Yes, it is the language of the angels.” Dean huffed a laugh. Very fitting, he thought.  
“To go with the wings on your back?” he asked, feigning ignorance.  
Cas smiled sadly as he replied, “You could say that.” but Dean could see from the way he had seemingly zoned out a little bit, that there was more to the story than that. He was curious.  
“I like them.” He complemented. “What do they say?”  
Cas smiled in response and yet wouldn’t answer, instead saying, “I like your tattoo as well. An anti-possession symbol right?” When Dean grunted his affirmation, he asked “What made you get that?” It was a pretty personal story so Dean usually just told people that he thought it looked cool, but for some reason he found himself telling Cas the real story before he could stop himself.  
“Well, Sam and I spent a month living with our uncle Bobby, well he's not really our uncle but he might as well be, anyway, Bobby’s really into mythology and all that, and Sam went through and read all of Bobby’s old folklore books about demons and stuff. So then when we hit the road again with dad, Sammy couldn’t sleep. He was only about 8 at the time and the stuff he'd read scared the crap out of him. So I went online and I found this symbol for protection and every night I would stick it up on the door of the motel, and that was the only way that Sam would go to sleep for almost a year.”  
Cas looked at him with a kind of awe. “Thats…very sweet of you Dean. You love your brother very much, don’t you?”  
“Yeah” said Dean. “More than anything. He is honestly the smartest person I’ve ever met. Did you know he got a full ride to Stanford? He didn’t end up going unfortunately, kid could've done great things.”  
“Why didn’t he go?” Cas asked curiously.  
And again, Dean answered with something that he normally wouldn’t tell a soul. “Dad didn’t let him. I never forgave dad for that.”  
Cas didn’t reply for a while. And then he asked about the tattoo again. “See, you just told me the story behind it but I highly doubt that you got it when Sam was 8 years old, so when?” He ran his fingers over the tattoo while asking.  
Dean was a little surprised that Cas had picked up on that, but he answered the question anyway. “About 7 years ago. Sam and I got matching ones. Dad had just died and we got them to remind ourselves that no one can ever own us.” They’d gotten it done just after they'd signed their contract with Crowley. It had been the brothers silent ‘fuck you’ to the crime syndicate. Not that it had really done much.  
Cas seemed satisfied with that answer though, and they didn’t speak anymore. They didn’t need to really. Lying together the way they were, Dean found all their gentle touches where oddly comforting and once again he was faced with a distinct feeling of familiarity, as if this wasn’t the first time they had done this. It really didn’t feel like he had only met Cas a number of hours ago. The fact that he already felt so close to the smaller man made him a little uncomfortable. He was way out of his depth here. And not just because Castiel was an assassin, but because it looked like Dean might not get out of this with his heart still in tact.  
Cas was lying on his stomach again and Dean traced the patterns in the wings on his lovers back. He suddenly realised that he'd just told a hit man quite a lot of personal information. Going back over it there wasn’t really much that Cas could use to pull off a hit. Still though, it probably should have bothered him more than it did.  
If Dean was being perfectly honest, he didn’t really see Cas as a threat to his brother, at least not yet. And so Dean found there to be no reason to kill him just yet, he was just going to enjoy this moment and worry about the whole assassin thing later.  
Little did Dean know that lying next to him, Castiel was thinking exactly the same thing.


	5. Getting more attached than you probably should

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after.

Castiel woke up before Dean. It was a habit he’d gotten into when he was younger, having to get up early for his training everyday. As a child he would be forced to get up every day, at about 6:00 and then go for a 5km run. He would then be at the training facility that the establishment had. here he had been trained in almost every form of combat. Castiel was an excellent marksmen, he was astounding at hand to hand combat. But what he was best at was knife fighting. His blade was his most precious weapon. It was also his favourite. Both to use and just to have with him. It was currently sitting in a secret compartment at the bottom of his bag, which he believed was still sitting in Dean’s living room.  
Looking back at Dean, he realised that they had both moved during the night and yet they were still lying with their limbs entangled. Dean was lying on his stomach, facing Cas. Cas couldn’t help but laugh at the way the blonde man’s cheek was squished against the pillow. He looked at ease in his sleep, peaceful, and yet vulnerable, almost childlike. Castiel let his gaze drift over Dean exposed, muscular back. He frowned when he noticed pale marks that here easily recognised as scars. Cas had noticed a few last night, but in the morning light and being no longer occupied, Castiel noticed that there were more than he first thought. The thin scars were undeniably knife marks. It made Castiel angry that someone would harm Dean in such a way. He knew that it would be somehow involved with the Winchester’s work with Crowley and it made Castiel hate the rude British man even more.  
Cas let his mind travel back to the things he and Dean spoke of last night. He was under the impression that Dean shared more with him than he would most people. Cas couldn’t help but wonder why. Maybe Dean felt the same pull that Cas did. Cas felt his hand travel down to the tattoos above his hip bone. When Dean had asked him about them, he had bee so tempted to tell him the truth. He had never told anyone what the words that were inked into his skin meant. But in that moment with Dean, Castiel had wanted to tell him that they were the names of his dead siblings. He didn’t like talking about it. In fact, he never had. Castiel had never told a single soul the truth about what had happened to his family, but last night he had been tempted to spill everything to Dean.  
Cas knew that he should have utilised that opportunity to ask questions about Sam, but for some reason the only thing he had wanted to ask about was Dean’s tattoo. Dean’s story made him smile. It was clear that Sam was more than a little brother to Dean and it was even more obvious that Dean was more than simply an older brother to Sam. It almost seemed as though Dean was a caring mother, a providing father, and a protective older brother all rolled in one and it warmed Castiel’s heart to see the affection in Dean’s voice when he spoke of his brother. But it also made his heart ache for his lost siblings.  
Cas knew it was highly unprofessional, but it was the way Dean had so affectionately spoken of the younger Winchester that caused Cas to decide to stay the night, rather than sneak out and complete the task that he had originally come to the town to complete. Instead he had decided that he could risk one night with Dean. However, add Dean shifted slightly, slowly waking up, he thought he could risk a morning as well.  
Dean’s arms wrapped around Castiel’s waist and he chucked. “Good morning Dean.”  
“mmm yeah it really is.” Dean murmured as he slowly opened his eyes. Cas smiled at this dopey, morning version of Dean. He liked it a lot. Cas thought Dean’s green eyes were even more splendid with the light of the morning seeping in though the curtains.  
“What time is it?” Dean asked.  
“Just before 7” Cas replied, selfishly hopping that Dean didn’t have to be anywhere for a while.  
“I have work at 8:30…” came a grumbled reply.  
“You don’t sound too happy about that.” Cas observed.  
Dean snorted and pushed his head further into the pillow. “Yeah well, I’m sorry if I don’t really wanna get out of bed when there’s a hot as fuck guy in there with me.”  
Cas grinned at the reply. “I know the feeling.”  
Dean huffed a laugh. “Flattery will get you everywhere, Cas”  
Cas ran his hands down Dean’s back and smiled at the shiver he got as a reaction. He leaned in closer the Dean and whispered in his ear. “That’s what I was hoping.”  
Dean groaned and pulled Cas in for a fierce kiss. They moved without breaking their kiss so that, once again, Dean was positioned below Castiel. Cas moved slowly down Dean’s body, kissing and sucking marks where ever he could. He wondered if Dean noticed the way he gave a gentle caress to each one of the scars he came across. Seeing them still hurt him, and they weren’t even on his body. Dean deserved to be cherished and Cas wanted to kill the monster that had done this to Dean.  
Stowing that thought away for later Cas continued his teasing ministrations by attaching his lips around one of Dean nipples. If he had his way he would have spent the entire day doing this to Dean just to hear the way he panted and feel the way he writhed underneath him. But unfortunately they didn’t have all the time in the world so Cas worked his way down further.  
When he reached Dean’s throbbing erection he let his breath ghost the tip and looked up, pleased when he heard Dean whimper. His blue eyes met Dean’s lust-filled green ones and without breaking eye contact he licked up Dean’s entire length until he reached the head. He let his spit gather a little bit before twirling his tongue around the head. Dean groaned but didn't break his line of sight. He looked as Cas like he was looking at the greatest view in the whole world. His look gave Cas a little more confidence, so he took Dean into his mouth.  
Cas knew he was good at giving head. He traveled around a lot so he had a lot of practice with various men from whichever town he was in. But those men meant nothing, especially not now. Now there was only Dean. And Cas wanted to make his really fucking good for him. He worked Dean’s cock into his mouth until he felt his nose touch skin, signally that he had successfully taking in Dean’s entire length.  
“oh fuck Cas… you are so good as that.”  
Cas hummed in agreement, eliciting another moan from Dean. Still having Dean fully sheathed in his mouth, Cas set to work. He hollowed out his cheeks and Dean keened. He started bobbing his head ever so slightly as Dean began thrusting up just a little bit. Cas was still very much in control, and he let Dean know it by restricting his hips so he couldn’t thrust up all the way. His tongue moved against the base of Deans cock and Dean’s hands reached down into Castiel’s dark hair. Dean’s grip in his hair was bordering on painful as Cas took Dean all the way once again. This time, he let Dean’s cock hit the back of his throat and he swallowed, causing his throat to constrict around Dean.  
“Fuck Cas…gonna come…fuck” Dean was panting heavily now and moaning at more regular intervals. He was sweating and his muscle were seizing and Cas knew it wasn’t long before he would be coming down the smaller mans throat. And that was exactly Castiel’s aim. He pulled back so he wouldn’t choke when Dean came, and the tip of is tongue running over Dean’s slit meant that Cas got exactly what he wanted.  
Dean’s come filled Castiel’s mouth and he swallowed without a second thought.  
‘oh god…holy fuck Cas…” he panted out. He grabbed Cas and pulled him up into a rough kiss, their tongues moving in and out of each others mouths with no real rhythm and yet what they lacked in finesse, they made up for with passion and enthusiasm. Dean kissed along his jaw and down his neck. He began to suck a bruise there as he dropped his had lower and gripped Cas’ length in his hand.  
Cas moaned. His hands were behind Dean’s neck, holding him in place as he trust gently up into Dean’s fist. Cas was a little embarrassed at how quickly the pressure was building up inside him. He was already on edge just from giving Dean head and in record time, he was spilling his come over Dean’s hand and moaning his name.  
Their panting and the smell of sweat filled the room and Dean spoke after a few moments. “I have to go have a shower and get ready for work.” and Cas absolutely did not pout at these words.  
Dean laughed at the other man’s reaction and gave him a small kiss. “You can stay here. Go back to sleep in you want.” he offered before walking off to the bathroom.  
Cas lay there for a moment but then got bored. He got out of bed and not wanting to out his own clothes back on, he grabbed Dean’s boxers from last night as well as an black ACDC t’shirt and they them on.  
Cas was not well versed on what to do after morning sex as it was not something he did very often. It was about quarter to 8 and Cas figured that Dean would want breakfast before work, so he made his way into the kitchen to see if perhaps he could be useful and make them something to eat.  
He checked what was in the fridge and decided to make an omelette. It wasn’t much, but he was pretty confident it would be good. His older sister Anna had taught him to cook. He had been a solider just like his older brothers and so everyone had always said that he would never need to know how to cook. Anna had taught him anyway. It became their special thing to do together. His parents always complained that Castiel could have been training for something important but neither of them had ever listened to their parents.  
He missed his sister every day, and it was times like this that he was so very glad that Anna had never let their parents bully her into giving up on the things they both loved. 

 

…

 

When Dean walked into the kitchen he saw Castiel serving breakfast for the both of them. He was wearing Dean’s favourite T-shirt and a pair of his boxers. He had never seen anyone look as good in his clothes. In fact, he thought there was a strong possibility that Cas looked better in his clothes than he did.  
Cas hadn’t seemed to notice his presence just yet and Dean smiled when he realised that Cas was humming the Aerosmith song from the night before. Cas didn’t even seem aware he was doing it but it was one of the cutest things Dean had ever witnessed.  
After a few more moments Cas finally noticed him. “I made breakfast…” He said with a shy smile. Dean found it hard to believe that firstly, this guy was an assassin, and secondly, he'd had Dean begging underneath him twice in less than 12 hours.  
Dean grinned as he sat down at the kitchen table. “I see that.” He said and Cas blushed. And Dean would never admit to how completely adorable he found that. he decided to stop being an ass. “It smells amazing Cas.” he complimented.  
Dean took a bite of the food and moaned. Realising how loud it was, he felt himself blush slightly. “Fuck man, thats amazing.”  
Castiel smiled at the compliment and Dean felt just a little bit proud that he was the reason for that smile. “Thank you Dean.”  
“No seriously Cas, it’s amazing. Where did you learn to cook like this?” he asked.  
Cas immediately broke their eye contact and his smile faltered. Dean was about to apologise when Cas whispered his answer. “My older sister taught me.”  
Sister. Sister. Why did Cas look so sad about that? And then Dean remembered what Charlie had said about the angel being the only surviving member of that cult. His sister must be dead. Dean felt bad for bringing up obviously painful memories.  
“What happened to her?” he asked softly. He would totally understand if Cas didn’t want to tell him about it, but he wasn’t going to pretend he wasn’t curious.  
“She died.” he paused, but he looked like he might say something else so Dean didn’t respond just yet. “She was murdered.” he added softly.  
Dean knew he had made an audible intake of breath. Murdered. Fuck that would be awful. “Fuck, Cas I am so sorry.” he said, “I don’t know what I would do if something like that happened to Sammy.” The minute the words came out of his mouth he remembered who he was talking to. The man who had been hired to do exactly that. Murder Sammy.  
Neither of them said anything about that comment, but they were both thinking the same thing as they returned to eating their breakfast.  
When they finished, Dean picked up both their plates and pressed a small, chaste kiss to Castiel’s temple. He could visibly see that Cas was a little shaken from bringing up his sister and Dean offered a tiny form of comfort in that gesture of affection.  
After putting away their dishes, Dean pulled Cas up from his chair and wrapped his arms around him. “I have to go to work now.” Dean felt his chest seize up a little bit at the way Cas pulled him even tighter at those words. Dean kissed him softly in response. “Will you be here when I get home at 5?”  
Cas looked thoughtful for a moment and Dean was worried he was about to say no. “Do you want me to be here…?” he asked nervously.  
Was that seriously what he was worried about? If what he was feeling was anything similar to what Dean was feeling then that shouldn’t even be a question. “Of course I do Cas.” he said. “That is why I asked.” he added with a laugh.  
Cas smiled in response and gave Dean another quick kiss before pushing him out the door with a promise to be there when he got back. Dean walked to work that day with a skip in his step. He was in a fucking fantastic mood and it was so noticeable that even Bobby noticed it about 10 minutes into the work day.  
“I’ll take it you made up with Sam then?” he asked.  
“Sure did Bobby.” came Dean’s cheerful reply.  
“It wasn’t that big of a fight boy, what're you so damn happy about?”  
One of Dean’s co-workers, Ash, decided that now would be the perfect time to start teasing him. “I bet he met a fucking gorgeous lady who rocked his world, right Dean-o?” he said with one of the biggest shit-eating grins Dean had ever seen.  
Dean smirked but didn’t reply. Ash didn’t know that he was into guys too. In fact, Bobby and Sam were the only two people who did. He didn’t keep it a secret because he was ashamed, more so just out of habit. As a teenager, he'd kept it all pretty hush hush from his Dad for fear of getting his ass kicked. Ironically, thats exactly what happened when he’d been caught with Michael.  
But John was dead. And now, with Cas in his life, Dean had no reason to hide who he was, so he turned to his co-worker, and with the biggest smirk he had ever mustered, he replied, “Actually Ash, I met a fucking gorgeous man who rocked my world.” Dean almost laughed at the way Ash’s jaw dropped.  
Even Bobby huffed a laugh before walking away. “Idgit” he muttered under his breath all while an affectionate smile was plastered onto his face.  
Dean got back to work with a smile. And throughput the day he thought of all they ways his life had changed in such a short number of days. The most drastic change being Cas. It had been one day, and Dean already wanted a thousand more. He kept telling himself that he was totally prepared for the possibility of having to kill Cas, and he would do it if it meant saving Sammy. But he thought it might kill him too.  
Holding that thought for a second Dean suddenly realised what he had just done with Ash. He had just come out. That in itself wouldn’t exactly be a big deal, except for the fact that he kinda came out for Cas. He had literally just came out to his friend so that he could be with Cas. As in, he wanted to be with Cas in a way that would include introducing him to friends and family. Well fuck Dean thought, I actually want to date Cas. And even the thought of Cas killing his little brother didn’t change the fact that Dean was excited to go home to Castiel waiting for him tonight.  
This whole thing was so fucked. He wanted to date the man who was planning the murder of his brother. He had this connection with the assassin that he couldn't ever recall having with anyone else. 

He was so fucked.


	6. Research

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas stays at Dean's apartment.
> 
> Also shower sex.
> 
> and no one likes Crowley

Castiel wandered around Dean Winchester apartment. He had to find a way to actually keep himself entertained for the whole day. He decided it would be the perfect opportunity to snoop around a little bit. It wasn’t Sam’s house, but from what everyone said it was the next best thing, so Castiel decided to have a little look around.  
There weren’t a lot of personal items on display in Dean’s house. He had a few photos here and there. One thing that Castiel did notice though was that there were no photos of John anywhere to be found. The only photo in which John was present was a family photo, the only family photo. Castiel had already assumed that Dean’s mother was no longer alive, and based on the fact that there were no photos of her after Dean was about 4 years old seemed to be confirmation of that. He couldn’t help but wonder what had happened to her. Dean’s mother had been a very beautiful woman, and he could very clearly see the family resemblance to the oldest Winchester boy.  
Castiel saw the clear distinction between Dean’s lover for his mother and he contempt for his father. He wondered why. Dean had only spent 4 years of his life with his mother, and he’d spent more than 20 with his father. What could his father have done to create that disdain that was so obvious?  
The most recent photo was of Dean and his brother. They were sitting on the bonnet of Deans car, sharing a beer. Whoever had taken the photo had taken it when neither of them were expecting and they were both laughing together and the moment seemed perfect. Castiel felt a pang of guilt when he thought of Dean losing his brother. He remembered what Dean had said earlier about how awful it would be to loose a sibling, and having lost all of his he knew that to be very true.  
The guilt of potentially being the reason Dean lost his little brother was beginning to eat away at him. Castiel didn’t understand. He’d being doing this job a long time and he knew how to emotionally detach himself. He always spoke to his targets, and more often then not their families as well. No one had ever gotten him to feel remorse like Dean had. It was confusing him quite a lot.  
Castiel decided to call Crowely and see if the unpleasant British man could answer any of his questions.  
Crowley answered on the third ring. “Crowley speaking.” was his simple greeting.  
“Mr. Crowley, I have some follow up questions about the Winchester brother now that I have met them.”  
“ahh angel…” Castiel could hear the smile in the other mans voice and desperately wanted to wipe it right off his smug face. “I will answer what I can.” he agreed.  
“What can you tell me about their father?” he asked first.  
“John? Well John is the reason for their contract.” said Crowley. “He owned me a lot of money when he died. His sons are paying it back with their… service.”  
“What did he owe you money for?” Castiel was starting to see why Dean would harbour even small amounts of hatred towards this man.  
“Drugs mostly. He was pretty reliant upon them. Sam and Dean apparently didn’t know. Their dad must have had them brainwashed nice and good.”  
Castiel almost wished they were talking in person so he could punch the bastard. “What about their mother?”  
“Her name was Mary. I only know what John told me, she died in a fire when the boys were kids. I think she was the reason he got into the drugs. Couldn’t handle her death.”  
And now Castiel fully understood Dean’s adornment for his mother. “What about the scars Dean has? Who did that?”  
Crowley was silent for a moment, clearly not expecting that question. “Alistair. His name was Alistair. He used to work for me. Guy was a sadistic bastard but he was good at his job. One day he had to help the Winchesters out with a job and he formed sort of an… attachment to Dean.” Crowley was clearly reactant to say anymore, but Cas was not satisfied with the answer he was given.  
“What do you mean attachment?” he pushed.  
Crowley signed. “More of an obsession really… He became convinced Dean would be the perfect student… An heir to his legacy in a way.”  
“And what legacy would that be?” he prompted further.  
“Torture.” Crowley said. “Alistair used to torture people for information and he had wanted to teach Dean to do the same. Dean refused and Alistair got angry. And after that, all I know is that Alistair wound up dead and Dean had those scars. I never asked for more details than that.”  
Castiel felt sick. How could anyone think that Dean was monster enough to torture people? He was extremely happy to find out that the guy was dead though. Castiel just had one more question. “Why do you need Sam to be exterminated and not Dean? It seems to me that they do everything together?”  
“Dean is hard working and loyal. He doesn’t like me but he always does what I tell him to. Sam doesn’t. Sam has cost me more than he is worth and hiring you was the best way to handle it.”  
“You told me before that Dean is protective of his brother. What were you planning on telling him once his brother is dead? Obviously not that it was you who ordered the hit.”  
“No, I’ll probably just tell him it was someone from The Demons gang. Sam has a history with them and they can’t stand me or either of the Winchesters. So it wouldn’t be too far fetched. And then Dean will spend the remainder of his life desperately trying to dismantling and destroying them, which is great for business so it’s a win win situation for me.”  
Not for Dean though, he thought. “That is all the questions I have for now. I shall contact you again if necessary.” And with that Castiel hung up. He was mad. Dean was getting played. Sam might be the one who would actually die but this would ruin Deans life too. He would loose the only person he cared about and then he would be tricked into spending the rest of his life doing Crowley’s bidding.  
And so Castiel made a decision. He was going to try and find a way around this. He was going to instead fake Sam’s murder. He would have to bide his time while he got some people he knew to create another identity for the younger Winchester. He would tell Dean the truth and then, maybe a few years later so Crowley didn’t get suspicious, Dean could join his brother. Castiel liked this plan. He knew that Dean would be upset when he found out who Cas really was, but the blue eyed man decided not to worry about this just yet. He would at least have a few more days until he had to tell Dean the truth. So he would enjoy his time with the oldest Winchester while he still could. And so Cas spent the rest of the day calling in favours from people all over the world, creating knew identities and searching for a place for Sam, and eventually Dean to live.  
Castiel ran his operations with complete and utter secrecy. There were a very limited number of people in the world who knew Castiel as more than simply “The Angel”. He was aware that this past was more commonly know, so much so that the first thing people asked when they found out who he is and where we came from is what happened to make him the only living member of his cult. He never told them though. Anyway, the secrecy made it a little bit harder to get the things he need for the brothers, he ended up having to promise two different people that he would do a job for them without pay, and knowing those two people they would certainly not be easy jobs. If Cas hadn’t already made the arrangements he would be questioning whether it was really worth all that trouble.  
His planning took all day. When he looked at the clock he realised it was 4:30. Dean would be home in half an hour and he was currently sitting at the dining table and sprawled out all around him were the photo’s of both Sam and Dean that he would be using for their fake identities. He had documents to his offshore bank accounts and printed out documents with all the possible safe houses for the Winchesters after he got them out of the country. It would all look very suspicious if Dean was to see it. Even the fact that he had been going though the older Winchesters photos would be suspicious, so Castiel had to put back everything the way he found it.  
He very carefully put things back the way they were, trying to take into account any breaks in the dust line. You can put anything except dust back the way it was. He deliberately didn’t look through anything that looked like it hadn't been touched in a long time so that Dean wouldn’t realise he had been snooping.  
Now he just needed to find something to do, so it looked like he had kept himself entertained with something that was actually legal. He had about 10 minutes before Dean was supposed to return. He looked through Dean’s movie shelf for something he could quickly put on. All of the movies were foreign to him, he did recognise the Lord of The Rings movies that Dean had mentioned before and made a mental note to asked Dean to watch them together before he moved towards Deans book shelf. He skimmed through the titles that the shelf contained before he finally recognised a tittle and smiled when he realised what it was; a tattered, well worn copy of Vurt Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse 5 was sitting there, Cas huffed a laugh when he saw that the classic novel was perched next to a copy of Busty Asian Beauties. Somehow he thought that represented Dean quite well.  
He had read the novel before, on course he had. And whats more, he had loved it. He pulled the book out and sat down with it on the couch. He had less than 5 minutes. He decided to skip to the second last chapter so he could then claim that he had been reading most of the day. He knew the book quite well so he found it easy to just read on from whatever page and by the time Dean opened his front door, Cas was already absorbed in the novel.  
Dean walked into the living room and smiled when he saw Cas. He placed one hand on the smaller mans shoulder, simply alerting him of his presence. Cas jumped a little before looking up and smiling at Dean.  
“Hello, Dean.” he said simply  
“Hey Cas.” Dean replied, pulling Cas in for a quick kiss. It wasn't a fiery kiss, but it wasn’t exactly chaste either. And suddenly, any doubt in Castiel’s mind that he wasn’t doing the right thing was gone. It was worth all the trouble to keep Dean safe.  
Dean looked down and saw the novel Cas was holding. “Good book.” he said.  
“Yes, it is.” Castiel agreed, “I’ve read it a few times actually.” Technically not a lie he thought to himself.  
Dean hummed in acknowledgment, although he clearly wasn’t paying much attention as he pulled Cas closer to him and started pressing small kisses on his shoulder. He kissed a trail right to the crook of Castiel’s neck and buried his face there for a moment. “Missed you Cas.”  
Castiel felt his heart melt a little bit, he got the impression that wasn’t something that Dean said often and he felt honoured to have received just a praise. “I missed you too Dean.” He was a little bit surprised at how much he actually meant it.  
Dean pulled away from their embrace with a shy smile. “Really?” he asked, as if he was genuinely curious.  
Castiel kissed his as a response. It was more than there previous kiss, just enough to get his point across without screaming take me to the bedroom, although he wouldn’t have minded that either. When he pulled away he realised that Dean had a large amount of grease and motor oil on him.  
It seemed as though Dean had this realisation at the same time he did. “Aw fuck. Man I am so sorry, I think I just got grease all over you.”  
Castiel looked down and sure enough, exactly were Deans face had been pressed moments ago, was a grease patch that perfectly mirrored the one on Dean’s face.  
“fuck I wish the guys would tell me it there before I leave.” Dean appeared to be getting rather agitated and Cas felt the need to reassure his that it wasn’t a big deal.  
“It’s perfectly alright Dean. In fact, now that we are both covered in this mess, it would only be logical to shower.” He said with a smirk.  
Dean looked momentarily confused, “like…together?” he asked uncertainly.  
Cas huffed a laugh. “That is what I was picturing Dean.”  
“well…” Dean looked positively giddy at the prospect. “I can totally get behind that idea.” and with that he pulled Cas up from the couch and practically dragged him into the bathroom.  
Cas quickly got undressed while Dean turned on the shower. While the taller man fiddled with the temperature of the water Cas began to remove Dean’s clothes as well. He took off Dean’s shirt and flung it to the other side of the room. He pulled Dean’s still clothes ass closer to him. His hands explored Dean’s chest for a moment before he delved lower and his had began to caress Dean dick, half hard and still in his Jeans.  
“Fuck.” Dean cursed and Castiel chuckled. “We need to get in there now.” Dean demanded and he quickly pulled off the rest of his clothes as Cas stepped underneath the spray of the warm water. The minute Dean joined him, Cas pushed him up against the wall and attacked his mouth. Dean decided he loved Cas’ tongue. The guy really knew how to use it.  
Dean thought back to the stellar blow job he had received that morning and similarly, how he had yet to return the favour. With a wicked grin he took a step back and dropped to his knees. Dean wasn’t as skilled at this as he was other aspects of sex. For most of his life he had hidden he fact that he liked guys and so to avoid being caught by his father most of his hook ups with men had been in the bathroom stalls of wherever they had met, occasionally he had gone back to the guys place if he’d had the time. It wasn’t classy at all and he hated that he'd had to do it that way, but at the time there isn’t much option. Anyway, since most of his experiences with guy were relatively quick, he has simply never had the time to perfect his blow job skills. But he would try his damn best for Cas.  
Cas looked down on his with hunger in his eyes and that spurred Deans confidence enough for him to lick a stripe from the base of Castiel cock right to the head where he licked at the pre come that was already forming there. Dean thought that if there was one feature that Dean liked more than Cas’ tongue it was his cock. Dean was suddenly strangely desperate to have it in his mouth. He took in as much of Cas as he could, he knew he wouldn’t be able to deep throat the way Cas had that morning, so he brought one of his hands up form Cas’ thigh and gripped the base of his cock. Dean started bobbing his head as he felt Castiel’s hands come down and entwine with his shirt blonde hair.  
“Dean… fuck…” Cas gasped out. Dean moaned around Castiel length. The guy didn’t swear much and to be perfectly honest, Dean was a little conceded about how much of a turn on his cursing was.  
Dean’s moan caused Cas to moan as well and as though taken by the primal urge to thrust, Cas began rocking slowly into Dean’s mouth. “Do you like sucking me off Dean?”  
Cas’ words had him moaning again. Dirty talk sounded fucking amazing in Castiel’s amazingly deep voice.  
Cas chuckled at Dean’s response. “I bet you like it so much that you could come without me even touching you, just from having my dick down your throat. What do you think Dean?”  
Dean knew his eyes widened at that, somewhat from alarm as well as arousal. As much as the idea was really fucking hot, Dean wasn’t sure he could do it. And honestly, he just really wanted Cas to touch him.  
Cas’ breathing was quickening and pretty soon he was panting above Dean. Dean could feel his jaw beginning to ache but he ignored it. The sounds Cas was making were totally worth it.  
What Cas said next could have made Dean come on the spot. “Dean… I want you to touch yourself. I want you to come just from getting me off.” It wasn’t a question, or a request. It was a command. And Dean’s only thought was fuck yes! Again, Dean was a little surprised at how much that turned him on, but he was revelling in exploring his newfound submissive nature.  
He reached down and wrapped the hand that wasn’t on Castiel’s cock around his own. He moaned, cherishing the relief he was feeling at finally being touched. It was a little harder to balance like this, he had to back his hand of Cas’ cock and place it on the blue eyed man’s thigh to steady himself. Cas didn’t seem to mind though, if anything he was gratefully as it allowed his to fuck into Dean’s mouth with a little more force.  
Dean hollowed out his cheeks and both men moaned at their mutual pleasure. Dean sped up the moment of his own fist around his cock as Cas’ movements began to falter. His pants were loud and his heavenly gasps of Dean’s name were getting more frequent and Dean knew he wasn’t far off coming.  
It was only a few more thrusts into Dean’s mouth and then Cas was coming, and just as Dean felt it he pulled back. He looked up at Cas and as the first drop of Castiel come it his face he came too. He shook and moaned as he spurted out on the floor of the shower and Cas groaned even louder at the sight of Dean on his knees with Cas’ come coating his face. He tried desperately to commit it to memory as it was only of the most perfect sights he had ever come across.  
Cas pulled Dean up from his knees and kissed him long and hard, groaning at the slight taste of himself on Dean’s tongue. Then he pulled away and decided the least he could do after that gorgeous display, was clean Dean up.  
Before he had met Cas, Dean had been pretty certain about what he liked and disliked, escpically when it came to sex. Cas had changed all that, he was causing Dean to question everything he knew about himself. Dean closed his eyes as he felt Cas cleaning up both the come and remaining grease from his body. He sighed and leaned into the touch. He was pretty exhausted now, but he wanted to stay awake with Cas.  
“Don’t fall asleep on me Dean.” Cas murmured.  
“M’not” came Dean’s slurred reply. Cas laughed and slowly helped Dean out of the shower. He led Dean into his room and picked out a pair of boxers and a shirt for the both of them. Dean was getting dressed when Cas spoke again.  
“Dean, while you were at work I was looking at your movie cabinet and I saw the films that you mentioned before… Do you think we could watch them tonight?”  
It took Dean a moment to remember the movies Cas was talking about, “Oh, you mean Lord of the Rings?” when Cas nodded his confirmation Dean sent his an affectionate smile. “Yeah I’d like that.”  
They walked to the lounge room and as Dean got The Fellowship of The Ring out of its case he heard his stomach rumble. “Hey Cas, Wanna order Chinese?“  
When Cas agreed, Dean called up his favourite Chinese place while Cas settled in, ready for the movie.  
The guy was so gentle, so calm. Dean still had a hard time believing that he was capable of killing someone. Both morally and skills wise. Thinking about it more closely, Dean really needed a way to assess Castiel’s still level and identify the level of threat he really posed. Then Dean had an idea.  
“Hey Cas, have you ever shot a gun?”  
Cas blinked in surprise as Dean’s question but he answered it anyway. “Yes I am quite skilled in firearms Dean… why do you ask?”  
Dean sat himself on the couch and pulled Cas into his arms. “Well, tomorrow is Wednesday, and on Wednesday’s I finish early at the garage and Sam doesn’t start at The Roadhouse until late so we usually go to the shooting range in the afternoon. I was wondering if you wanted to come with us?” It wasn’t a lie, working for Crowley meant that both Sam and Dean had to keep up their combat skills. Dean was pretty proud of this plan though. Not only would it allow for Dean to learn how ‘skilled in firearms’ Cas really was. And even better than that, it would mean that Cas would get to see the skill level of both Sam and Dean. Hopefully it would convince him that perhaps this job was’t going to be as easy as he once thought.  
Cas seemed to consider it for a moment. “I wouldn’t be interrupting anything?” he asked. Dean didn’t think he really cared, he was probably just asking out of politeness.  
“Of course not man, I bet Sam would love to see you again.” That probably wasn’t a lie either.  
“Then yes, that would be enjoyable.”  
Dean smiled. “Awesome. Now lets watch the movie.” he said pressing a kiss to Castiel’s forehead.  
All in all, Dean found the night really enjoyable. Their food came, that was awesome. He was watching one of his favourite movie, and that was awesome too. But by far the best thing about it was the way be got to spend it all with Cas in his arms. He found it slightly odd how Cas was very clearly the dominant one when it came to sex, but with everything else it was Dean who was the dominant personality. Dean was just more outgoing than his lover. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. The thing is though, Cas wasn’t quiet in a shy way. No, it was more in a secretive way. As if he thought he would be giving away too much by saying one word at all. In fact, if Dean was going by what Charlie had found out then that was probably exactly that. This guy has probably seen some of the most awful things. His childhood would have been at least as bad as Deans. But Dean’s shitty childhood wasn’t that bizarre. He had a dead mother and an absent, addict father, they had lived on the road and in motels, and Dean had to steal for them to eat. He was sure that there were a lot of kids all over the world who could relate to that. But not many people could say they grew up in a violent, religious cult, of which all the members expect themselves were slaughtered. And based on everything that had happened between them, Castiel was gay, or at the very least bisexual. That could never have gone down well in a place like that. That’s if Cas had told them. Hell, Dean wouldn’t have. But still it would have been hard. Dean remembered what it was like discovering he was also interested in guys. It had been hard because of his asshole, homophobic father. He remembered feeling like there was something wrong with him. Dean couldn’t imagine what it would have been like going through all of that in a highly religious commune that was almost certainly homophobic as well.  
So Dean figured maybe Cas’ quietness was justified, he was probably worried that if he said anything at all he'd end up telling someone about something highly illegal, be that something he himself had done, or something he had witnessed at that cult. Dean realised with a heavy heart that there were true horror’s in Castiel’s past, horrors most people could scarcely imagine.  
But what confused Dean more than anything he had just deduced, was that he wanted to know it all. The green eyed man looked down at the person sitting in his arms and Dean just wanted to give the guy everything he had never had. He found himself hoping that maybe Cas will get a little intimidated by the skill Sam and Dean possess when he comes shooting with them tomorrow, and maybe, just maybe, Dean was hoping that would make Cas call off the hit and stay with him. It was a slightly ridiculous hope. But he was hoping it all the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 10 points to Gryffindor if you got the Harry Potter reference!!!


	7. How good is your aim?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Dean takes Cas to a gun range to assess his skills.

Both the men groaned at the sound of Dean’s alarm.  
“Dean, it’s only 8 o’clock. Turn that damn thing off!” Castiel’s words were muffled by his pillow.  
Dean chuckled as he turned off the obnoxious sound.  
“Sorry Cas, gotta get to work earlier so I can leave earlier too.”  
Cas just groaned again. And Dean just laughed again. “You can go back to sleep Cas.” Dean loved early morning Cas. He thought it was adorable. Although he could totally understand why Cas was tired. They had stayed up until the early hours of the morning watch the entire Lord of The Rings trilogy. Dean had told Cas that they shouldn’t watch them all in one go, that it would end up taking them like 9 hours. But when the first one had ended Cas just really wanted to know what happened next.  
“But are Sam and Frodo going to be okay on their own Dean?” he had asked, along with a hundred other questions. Dean had just decided to put the next one on because he was too lazy to answer them all.  
When the second one ended Cas desperately wanted to watch the next one as well. At that point it was already the middle of the night, but when Dean suggested they go to bed instead Cas had pouted. He had actually fucking pouted. And as if that wasn’t the fucking cutest thing Dean had ever seen. So he put the next one on. Apparently he can’t deny Cas anything.  
But it was like 3 in the morning when they finally went to bed. So Cas had every right to be fucking tired.  
After Dean got dressed, he made himself a coffee and then set the machine up so Cas could make himself one when he eventually got up. “Hey baby, I’ll pick you up at about 4 o’clock alright?” Baby? What? Dean’s car was the only thing he had ever called that. Cas grunted in affirmation. “You can borrow some of my clothes if you don't wanna get yours dirty. And also the coffee machines ready for you when you want it.”  
Cas perked up at that. He actually pulled his face out of the pillow and gave Dean a kiss. “You are a saint.”  
Dean laughed at that. “Not after the thing we’ve done the last two days.” he said with a smirk. He knew it was a cheesy as fuck line, but it was totally worth it to hear Castiel’s responding chuckle and see him roll his eyes affectionately.  
Dean left the apparent after stealing another kiss from his sleepy lover. As he walked out he called over his shoulder reminding him to be ready by 4 and that there was left over Chinese in the fridge if he was hungry.  
When Dean got in the impala and started making his way to work, he was hit by how awfully domestic their morning had been. Seriously, at least the morning before there had been a little morning sex action there. But there had been nothing like that today, and yet Dean loved it just as much.  
Getting to see Cas grumble about being woken up and then praising Dean for simply getting his coffee readymade the older Winchester very happy. In fact, the more Dean thought about it the more he realised that just Cas in general made him very happy. It was more than a little bit concerning given the situation of their meeting.  
Nonetheless, Dean was looking forward to spending the afternoon with Sam and Cas. He knew it probably wasn’t a good idea to let Cas anywhere need his brother, but the highly trained assassin was certainly not stupid enough to do anything in a public place, where there were lots of witnesses and cameras. So Dean wasn’t too worried. He was actually really looking forward to it. In fact, he thought he might take Cas out for dinner somewhere afterward, just the two of them. Sammy had to work anyway.  
That reminded him. Dean hadn't actually told Sam that he’s invited Cas along, so he figured he should probably give his brother a call.  
When Sam picked up he still sounded sleepy. Dean felt a little guilty when he realised he'd probably just woken his brother up.  
“What’s up Dean?”  
“Hey there Sammy. Just wanted to let you know that I invited Cas to the range with us today.”  
“Cas…?” it took Sam a moment to realise who Dean was talking about. “Oh! Cas from the bar the other night? He's still with you?” Sam asked in a disbelieving tone. Dean rolled his eyes. He could understand his brother’s skepticism towards that. It was pretty widely known that Dean didn’t usually dance in the dark with the same person twice. And when he did, it was usually just because he ran into them again at a bar. It was certainly very rare for the same person to stay at his house for two whole nights. It fact, it was very rare that Dean bring anyone back to his house at all, almost always opting to go back to their house. So yeah, Dean understood Sam’s disbelief. He didn’t like it, but he understood.  
“Yes, Cas from the bar. Is it okay if he comes? Not that it really matters because he’s coming anyway.”  
And now it was Sam’s turn to roll his eyes. “Yeah of course it’s fine. Why do you want him to come anyway?”  
Because he’s an assassin who is going to kill you and I need to assess his skill set. “Well, I figured there was no point him staying home alone if he could be with you and me.” Dean thought that was as good a reason as any.  
“Huh, fair enough.” Sam still sounded a little shocked that Dean was still spending time with a person from 2 nights ago. If Dean didn’t totally get why, he might have been a little offended. He just hoped that Sam didn’t say anything to the other man when they saw each other later. The last thing he needed was for the assassin to know that Dean had developed a slight emotional attachment to him. Lord knows what he might do with that information.  
“Yeah, anyway, gotta go Sammy. Cas and I will see you later.” Dean said as he pulled up at the garage.  
“Alright, see you later Dean.”  
So for the rest of the day Dean was positively buzzing. Everyone at the garage knew that today was the day he finished early, and it was common knowledge that he was always happy on the days he was seeing Sam. But apparently word had spread pretty quickly about Dean’s new mystery man, and since Dean was even happier than normal people assumed his new man was still in the picture. Their reactions were quite similar to Sam’s. But again, it was only Ash who was brave enough to comment on it. Ash was lucky he was practically family, or Dean probably would have gotten really pissed off really quickly. But Dean knew Ash didn’t care if he was with a man, so he didn’t bother with it.  
“Dean-o, looks like that guys still, what did you say it was? Rocking your world?” he asked with a sly grin.  
Dean laughed from where he was under the car. “Hell yeah, he is Ash! Guy’s awesome.”  
Ash snorted. “Man do I know him?”  
“Nah.” Thank god. “He’s not a local.”  
“When are you gonna bring him round to meet us all?”  
“Uhhh… I’m not…?” Did Ash really expect him to? He’d known the guy for two days? Sure it felt longer, and those two days had been some of the best ever, but he wasn’t going to introduce Cas to his extended family. Maybe he would consider it if Cas wasn’t a fucking assassin, but evidently that was not the case.  
“Aw c’mon dude! I wanna meet the guy that has Dean fucking Winchester wrapped around his little finger. And I’m sure Bobby does too. Hell, I’m sure Ellen, Jo and Charlie would love to give him the third degree.”  
“Not gonna happen man.” He said with determination, praying to god Ash would take a fucking hint. There was no way they were all meeting Cas. Especially not Charlie. That girl was smart and it wouldn’t take her very long to figure out that Cas was The Angel that he had asked for information on. Literally everything about the guy screamed angel. And that was excluding his physical appearance. If you added that in the mix there was no way Charlie wouldn’t figure it out.  
Dean was lucky enough that Bobby interrupted them before Ash had a chance to reply.  
“Ash get back to work. And leave Dean alone ya idgit.” he said.  
“Whatever old man.” Ash said in a friendly jest as he walked back to his work station.  
Dean was grateful, and he expressed as much. “Thanks for that Bobby.”  
His surrogate father patted him on the back. “Don’t mention it son.” he paused for a moment. “He’s right though. I would like to meet this boy of yours.”  
Dean rolled his eyes and could hold back a laugh. He loved that his family cared so much, but it didn’t change the fact that there was no way they were meeting him. No matter how much he liked the guy.  
Dean was lucky enough to get off without anyone else harassing him to meet Cas. He was supposed to be meeting his brother at the range in about half an hour, it only look 15 minutes to get there but he still had to pick up Cas, so the timeline fit well.  
He opened the door to his apartment. “Honey I’m home.” he called out, hoping to god that Cas realised it was a joke. Dean knew the guy sometimes didn’t get pop culture references.  
But he relaxed a little bit when he heard Cas laugh and call out his reply. “I’m in your room Dean, I’m just grabbing one of your shirts.”  
Huh, well that means Cas is shirtless and in my room. Dean thought to himself. He smirked and made his way to the main bedroom. And just as predicted, there was Cas. Wearing his own black slacks and boots, but rummaging through Dean’s draw for a shirt, having obviously decided that his own dress shirt, suit and trench coat were not appropriate for a gun range. Dean pressed himself had against Cas’ back and drew him arms around the smaller man’s waist.  
“Hello Dean.” He said with a smile lighting up his face.  
That smile warmed Dean’s heart more then he liked to admit. “Hey Cas. You ready?”  
“I’m not sure which shirt would be appropriate.” he said, his bore furrowed a little him. “I’ve never been to a gun range before.” he said.  
Dean started searching through the draw too, he knew he'd have something Cas could wear. “I thought you said you were good with firearms?” Dean asked. There was no way an assassin had never been to a gun range.  
“Oh I am, I just didn’t learn at a range.”  
“Who taught you then?” Dean asked curiously.  
“My older brother did.” Cas said after a moment.  
“You have an older brother?”  
“I had two.” came the other man’s reply.  
Oh right. Dean didn’t know why he kept forgetting that Cas had no family. In fact, he kept forgetting who Cas was entirely. Which was not a good thing.  
“Aw I’m sorry man…” Dean began.  
Cas interrupted him immediately. ‘It’s fine Dean.”  
Understanding that Cas did not want to talk about it he went back to searching for a shirt. A moment later he pulled out one of his old black T-shirts. It would be comfortable and he really didn’t care if Cas ruined it. He handed it to the dark haired man with a smile. As Cas pulled the shirt on over his head, Dean let his eyes rake over the man’s body. He eyes caught on the tattoo above his hip. He still didn't know what it meant.  
“Hey Cas, You never told me what that tattoo means?” he said, slightly phrasing it as a question and hoping Cas picked up on his subtle curiosity.  
“I know.” was all he got in reply. Dean was going to press further but the look on Cas’ face told him it was something pretty personal and there was a reason Cas didn’t tell him the first time. It only made him more curious.  
“Right, well Sam’s expecting us soon so we better get going.” he decided to change the subject instead. Cas seemed grateful.  
20 minutes later they pulled up at the gun range. As they walked through the door Dean made a split decision to link his fingers with Castiel’s. He knew they would get a few looks for that. He also knew that one of the guys that worked there was a blatant homophobe. But Dean also knew that guy wasn’t going to say anything. After all, he had seen both Sam and Dean work a gun. So he walked into the place with his head held high, a smile on his face, and his hand entwined with his lover’s. He felt pretty great. And when he saw his little brother standing at their usual target preparing his favourite gun, Dean felt even better.  
“Hey Sammy.” he called and pulled is brother into a tight hug, not too tight though, because he would have to let go of Castiel’s hand to do that.  
“Hey Dean.” he said returning the hug, before turning his attention to Castiel. “Good to see you again Cas.”  
Cas stretched out his hand and shook the younger Winchester’s hand. “You too, Sam.”  
If Sam saw them holding hands, he didn’t comment on it.  
“So guess what I brought today Sammy.”  
“If you actually make me guess I’m going to hit you.” came his brother’s reply.  
Cas had a bit of a chuckle at that. Dean rolled his eye and reached into the bag he was carrying. He pulled out the colt.  
“I thought you could have a go with it?” Dean suggested nervously.  
Sam’s eyes widened. “Are you serious?”  
“As the plague.” Dean said.  
“Fuck yes!” Sam practically snatched the gun out of Dean’s hands. He was grinning wider than Dean had seen in a long time and Dean laughed affectionately at his brother’s reaction.  
Once Sam was out of earshot, Cas finally spoke up. “Is there a specific reason your brother got so excited by a gun?”  
Dean was still holding Castiel’s hand, he moved it so his arm was wrapped around the smaller man’s waist, as close as they possibly could be in a public place. Still looking in his brothers direction he answered, “It was our dads. He taught both Sam and I to shoot with that gun. I kept it after dad died. I don’t bring it to the range, like ever. And I normally don’t let him use it.”  
“Why don’t you let him use it?” Cas asked, sounding more curious than accusing.  
“I don’t let anyone use it. Just like I don’t let anyone drive baby.” He realised that sounded a little stupid but they were the only things he had that were actually linked to good memories of his father. He liked to make sure they were safe.  
“Plus she’s a hell of a nice gun. You should try her out.” Dean continued.  
“I would like that Dean. Perhaps when Sam has finished. In the meantime, we should find another gun for the two of us.” Dean was onboard with that. He was also extremely glad that Cas seemed to understand what a big deal it was for Dean to offer him the colt.  
As they organised their guns, Dean couldn’t stop staring at how ridiculously hot Cas looked in his shirt. Or how fucking fantastic is ass looked in those pants. Dean was beginning to understand why he preferred to stay at the apartment with Cas.  
They ended up grabbing just average handguns for the two of them and setting up their targets side by side. Dean wanted to see Cas’ best, and he got the impression that the assassin wasn’t stud enough to show his most likely perfect aim straight away, Cas didn’t seem one to show off. He had to get Cas to step up.  
“Alright so, I have an idea.”  
“I’m listening.” Cas said curiously.  
“When we go out for dinner after this…” Cas raised an eyebrow, “… because that’s what we’re doing…” Dean informed his lover, “…whoever gets the better shots doesn’t have to pay.” Dean was already planning on paying. It was a date after all. So it wouldn’t be all that bad when he lost.  
Cas’ grin was totally evil. “I don’t think you realise what you just proposed Dean.”  
Checkmate. Dean knew he had just convinced Cas to do the best he could. The knowledge only made Dean return his lovers evil smile. “I guess you’ll just have to prove it.”  
They agreed on shooting a total of 10 rounds and then getting Sam to judge who had the better aim of the two. They put on their earmuffs, Sam was watching from behind them finding the whole thing evidently very amusing. Sam was going to be the mediator, he counted to three with his fingers and when his third finger came into view they both turned their attention to their targets and fired.  
Dean tried to forget about Cas and about their little competition. He knew he couldn't beat a goddamn assassin. He was just shooting like he always did. He let himself relax, he always felt calm when he was shooting his gun. He wasn’t sure whether or not he should be concerned about that. But he shook that thought away. Shooting calmed him down because he’d been doing for so long. And it was one of the only good experience he had with both Sam and his father. It reminded him of a time where he didn't have to deal with unpaid debts, drug lords, and fucking assassins.  
He aimed the best he could and shot. And before he knew, their 10 shots were over. Dean’s were pretty good. He was happy with them. All 10 would have fatally wounded had it been a person. They weren’t perfect though, only about 4 would have been an instantaneous death.  
He looked over at Cas’ target. The guy had made him look like a fucking beginner.  
“wow…” both Sam and Dean were shocked. Every single one of Castiel’s shots had been kill shots. There were 5 to the heart and 5 to the head. If Dean was being perfectly honest, it was kind of really hot.  
The brothers were speechless and for the first time ever, Dean was one hundred percent convinced of this guys efficiency as an assassin.  
“How…” Sam stuttered, still wide eyed with shock, “how the fuck did you do that!?” he exclaimed.  
Cas shrugged. “My older brother taught me.”  
Sam looked over at Dean. “Why couldn’t you have taught me like that Dean.”  
Sam’s comment woke Dean out of his reverie and he laughed. “Sam literally no one can shoot like that.”  
Cas interjected. “Evidently I can. You owe me dinner now Dean Winchester.”  
Dean patted Cas on the shoulder. “After that display… you fucking deserve it.” he said as he pressed a small kiss to Cas’ smiling lips.  
Sam raised is eyebrow a little bit at the public display of affection, knowing that wasn’t really something that Dean really ever did. Dean ignored him and he hoped Cas didn’t see his brothers reaction.  
“Oh Dean, I forgot to tell you. I have to go into work earlier than usual tonight. Jo’s going out tonight and Ellen needs help.”  
“When do you have to head off?” Dean asked, a little upset that their evening would we cut short.  
Sam replied hesitantly. “Now actually…”  
Dean didn’t reply for a moment. There was a bit of an awkward silence as Cas and Sam thought Dean was getting really upset.  
“Well you know what? Cas and I can meet you at the roadhouse, we’ll grab a booth and you can cook us up a burger.”  
Cas looked excited at this prospect, but it was Sam who spoke first, clearly relieved that Dean wasn’t upset with him. “Really?”  
“Hell yeah!” Dean exclaimed. “I owe Cas a dinner anyway, and I should probably say hello to Ellen before she accuses me of not coming to see her enough.”  
And so with that, they left the range. Dean left feeling rather happy because he had an actual real life date with Castiel and that made his stomach flip. But it was also quite somber, the condition Cas left his target in had been a real reality check for Dean. Cas was good at what he did. There was a reason he was so well known when so little was actually known about him. It scared him shitless. If this man wanted Sam dead, hell, if this man wanted Dean dead, he could do it with no hardships whatsoever.  
Dealing with this assassin was becoming more of problem then he could have ever foreseen.  
And yet, as he walked out the door of the gun range, once again holding Castiel’s hand in his own, he had the distinct feeling that everything was happening the way it should.


	8. A realisation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas and Dean run into one of Dean's old conquests while on a date. 
> 
> Also sex in the impala, which is always great.

It was about 5:30 in the evening when Dean and Cas found themselves driving from the gun range to The Roadhouse. They had managed to kill about an hour and a half at the range, with Cas showing off his perfect aim, and Sam’s overall excitement at being allowed to use the colt.  
Dean was driving, as usual. He reached over a grabbed Cas’ hand, linking their fingers together. Cas smiled. “Thank you for inviting me today Dean. I enjoyed it very much.”  
Dean absentmindedly stroked his thumb in circles where it was sitting on Cas’ hand. “No worries Cas. I’m glad you came.” Cas looked rather pleased at that, “And now I have an excuse to take you on a proper date.” he continued.  
“You could have just asked Dean. I would have said yes.” Cas said pointedly.  
“Yeah but where’s the fun in that?” Dean asked rhetorically, sending a checking grin in the smaller man’s direction. “Besides, you looked pretty hot working a gun like that. I was trying my best not to jump you in public.”  
Cas raised his eyebrow. “I wouldn’t have minded.” he said casually.  
Dean choked out a shocked sound and looked up at Cas. Cas was looking at him with a distinct hunger in his eyes. Dean knew what that meant.  
“Dean…” Cas started “…I did win our bet today. I think I deserve a reward.”  
Dean definitely didn’t gasp at Castiel’s words. “Your reward is dinner. I think that’s enough.”  
Cas untangled their fingers and started moving his hand slowly up Dean’s thigh.  
“Hmm I’m not sure I agree.”  
Dean could already feel himself getting hard. “Cas! I’m driving. If you make me crash Baby, I swear I’ll kill you.  
“You’ll just have to be extra careful then.” Cas said as he undid the button of Dean’s jeans and pulled down the zipper.  
Cas reached into Dean’s pants and pressed him palm against Dean’s half hard cock though his boxers. He was moving slowly but it didn’t take very long for Dean’s cock to start throbbing with need. Then, and only then, did Cas move his hand inside Dean’s boxers.  
“Fuck Cas!” Dean gasped as he swerved the car. He was lucky there was no one else on the road.  
“Eyes on the road Dean.” Cas said casually, as if he didn’t have his hand on Dean’s cock, totally driving him insane.  
Dean tried to concentrate, but Castiel’s slow pace was driving him fucking crazy. He needed Cas. Like, yesterday.  
“Son of a bitch! Fuck!” Dean muttered a string of curses as pulled the car over onto the side of the road. He got out of the car and moved as quickly as he possibly could around to the passenger side, where Cas was sitting with a smug look on his face.  
“What’s wrong Dean?” Cas asked innocently. Dean had no fucking clue how he could be so calm when Dean himself had never been more flustered and needy in all his life.  
“Backseat. Now!” Dean growled and the minute Cas got out of the passenger seat, Dean practically attacked him. Their lips mashed together. It was the kind of kiss where teeth collide, and it was fucking perfect. Dean inched them closer to the backdoor of the car, he heard one of the cars going past honking at them, but he really didn’t care. He needed Cas.  
As soon as he got the door open, he pushed Cas down onto the seat. Cas looked up at him, blue eyes blown with pure lust and Dean’s saliva glistening on his pink lips. Dean surged forward, barely remembering to close the door behind him. Moments later he was straddling his lover’s thighs and exploring his mouth with his tongue. Dean would never get over how good Cas tasted. He started grinding down on Cas’ lap and the friction caused both men to moan lightly. Suddenly just kissing and grinding with their clothes still on wasn’t enough. He broke their kiss and pulled Cas’ shirt off over his head, Cas was on board with the idea and quickly returned the favour.  
Dean struggled for a moment, attempting to get his jeans off with some sort of finesse. Based on Castiel’s huffed laugh he failed miserably. But he really didn’t care about embarrassing himself right now.  
Dean suddenly remembered that they would need lube, and that they were going out for dinner after this. He pulled back from Cas and leaned over to grab stuff from the glove box. His ass was on perfect view for his lover as he completed this movement. Cas assumed himself by grabbing a handful of Dean’s ass and kneading in gently. “Have I ever told you that you have the most amazing ass?” Cas said.  
Dean blushed at the compliment. He turned back around and handed Cas a small bottle of lube and a condom.  
Cas raised his eyebrow at the condom. Dean thought that was fair enough, it was a little bit strange to ask your lover to wear a condom the second time you have sex rather than the first.  
“We’re going out for dinner. I don’t exactly want your come dripping out of me while I’m trying to eat a burger.” Dean said bluntly.  
Cas laughed at Dean’s vulgarity, placed the condom beside him and opened the bottle of lube. Dean felt Cas pull him even closer, until their chests were touching. Cas sucked at Dean’s neck and Dean felt himself going crazy with pure want.  
He once again fondled Dean’s ass as he slicked up one finger with the lube and pressed it inside Dean, beginning to open him up.  
Dean groaned slightly and positioned himself to make his hole more assessable to the other man, and almost as a reward for his compliance, Cas added another finger.  
Cas added a third finger soon after and pretty quickly found Dean’s prostate which caused him to moan louder than he had previously. Cas kept thrusting his fingers in, and soon Dean was moaning and panting above him. It wasn’t enough, he needed Cas inside him. He got the distinct feeling that Cas knew that too, he was just reminding Dean who was really in control. Dean might have been on top, but Cas was still the one with the power. And Dean was totally fine with that.  
“Cas please…” Dean would never stop being awed as Castiel’s ability to make him beg.  
Cas bit down lightly and the junction of Dean’s neck and that was it. Dean was gone. He would literally do anything to get Cas inside him that very second.  
“Fuck! God, Cas just fuck me already.” he panted. “Jesus fuck, Cas please.”  
Castiel pulled his fingers out and Dean whined at the emptiness, cantering his hips forward desperately. Cas reached down and pulled out his cock, his pants and the boxers he was wearing were hardly pushed down below his ass. His cock was throbbing just as much as Dean’s and Dean knew Cas wasn’t going to last much longer than him. He were both done.  
Cas pulled on the condom as quickly as he could and then slicked himself up with lube. He gave himself a few strokes before lining up. Dean was digging with nails into Castiel’s shoulders with utter desperation.  
“Please, Cas. Want you. I want you so much.” Cas was being much too slow for his liking.  
Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean’s waist, his chest was shaking as he pouched against the tight ring of muscle, slowly at first. And then, with a quick jerk of his hips, he buried himself deep inside the other man.  
Dean cried out and pressed his face against Cas’ skin, tasting the sweat that covered him.  
It burned a little bit, it always burn slightly at first. But it was the best kind of pain there was. Dean took it, he made himself feel it all. Wanting it more than anything.  
Dean was on top but he was held firmly in place by Castiel’s arms around him. He could just move enough to push his hips down ever so slightly was Cas thrust up into him.  
Cas’ pace was unrelenting and Dean loved it. His knew his fingernails were scratching their way down Castiel’s back, and he was panting and moaning into the crook of the other man’s neck. They moved in perfectly in time. In fact, Dean found it kind of surreal how well they fit together.  
Sex with Cas was undoubtably the best sex of his life and soon, he felt the pressure and the urge to come building faster than it ever had before. Cas seemed to agree because his breaths were quickening and grip around Dean’s waist had tightened ever so slightly.  
Cas was pounding into him hard and fast, nailing his prostate with every thrust. It felt fucking amazing and Dean could feel himself rushing towards his orgasm. If Cas didn’t slow up, he thought he might come without anyone actually touching his cock.  
Apparently Cas seemed to like that idea, because he definitely did not slow up at all. And not a minute later Dean felt his tight channel clenching around Castiel’s cock. He practically screamed out Cas’ name as white ropes of come coated both their stomachs. Cas continued to thrust him though his orgasm and Dean felt his eyes water just slightly at the intensity of it all.  
Cas was in quick pursuit of Dean’s orgasm and came into the condom, chanting Dean’s name like a fucking prayer.  
They both came down from their mind-blowing high pressed up against each other. Cas was leaning back on the door of the impala with his arms still wrapped around Dean, resizing to let go. Their breathing evened out, but they didn’t move for a few moments, deciding to instead stay tangled up in each other, pressing small kisses to whichever pact of skin they could find.  
The car was hot and humid, and the windows had fogged up, they were coated in each other’s sweat which under any other circumstances would have been disgusting but they found that neither of them really minded.  
Slowly they moved off each other. Neither said a word, they didn’t have to. They just dressed themselves in quietly and Dean walked back to the driver’s seat.  
“Aw fuck!” he yelped as he sat down.  
Cas immediately looked up, concerned. “What wrong Dean?”  
Dean scowled as he handed Cas the keys to the car and walked around to the passenger seat. “You’re gonna have to drive us to The Roadhouse.” he muttered.  
Castiel was confused. Dean had said earlier that he didn’t let people drive his car. “Why? Dean what’s going on?” he asked.  
“Can’t drive yet, ass hurts too much.” he mumbled.  
Cas looked even more concerned. “I didn’t hurt you did I?”  
“No no…” Dean reassured him “…I’m a little sore now it’s over.” he said, not meeting Cas’ eyes. God, he was pretty embarrassed. Not being about the drive Cas to their date because he’d been pounded so hard he couldn’t sit properly.  
Cas seemed to find it all very amusing, and Dean scowled as he noticed Cas trying his very best not to laugh.  
“Just don’t crash my baby.” Dean snapped as Cas turned on the engine. Dean wasn’t, perhaps slightly irritated but not mad.  
They made their way to The Roadhouse in a comfortable silence. When they reached their destination, they were greeted by a familiar face at the door. Well, familiar to Dean.  
“Dean! It’s about time you showed your face around here boy.” Ellen pulled him into a tight hug. “Is it really that damn hard to pick up a phone? You better put me on speed dial kid.” she said, giving him a small smack on the side of his head.  
“Yes Ma’am” Dean replied with a smile.  
Ellen nodded in acknowledgment and then turned her attention to Castiel, who was still standing beside him. “You must be the boy Sam and Ash told me about.” she said.  
Dean groaned. Of course she would have talked to Ash.  
Cas looked a little confused. Which was fair enough, he didn’t even know who Ash was.  
“Ellen, this is Cas.” he said, “And before you say anything, please keep in mind that Ash doesn’t know shit.” Both Cas and Ellen raised an eyebrow at him. “Now Cas and I would like a table for two and a couple of burgers, please.” he continued.  
Ellen rolled her eyes and led them to a booth near the back, knowing that they would probably prefer some privacy. Dean pulled his phone and wallet out of his pocket as hit went to sit down, he internally panicked when he realised he didn’t have the keys to his baby. And then he remembered.  
“Hey Cas, do you still have the car keys?” he asked.  
Cas reached into his pocket, “Oh yes, here.” he said as he pulled them out and threw them across the table for Dean to catch.  
Ellen was standing there, absolutely dumbfounded. “He let you drive the impala?” she asked Cas.  
“Yes…” Cas said slowly.  
Her eyes darted between the two lovers for a moment, but before Dean could respond she was walking off muttering something along the lines of “Ash doesn’t know shit, my ass Dean Winchester.”  
Dean could feel himself blushing, but before he could apologise profusely to Castiel, he was being asked a question. “Who was that Dean?”  
“That was Ellen. She owns The Roadhouse.” He explained. “I guess, Sam and I kind of see her as our mother, that’s why she was so pissed off about me not visiting.”  
Cas looked thoughtful for a moment. “She seems a little bit scary.”  
Dean laughed and all the tension he had felt washed away. “She would be very happy to hear you say that.” he said with a chuckle.  
And for the next hour or so, the night went smoothly. They both ordered a burger. Dean had a beer and Cas had vodka. Dean was still surprised at how much Cas could drink without really being affected. They talked about some more mediocre things, but that was alright. Cas made him laugh and he was enjoying himself more than he had in a very long time.  
Suddenly he heard someone calling out his name.  
He looked over a saw someone he never thought he would see again. “Victor…?”  
Victor was just a guy that he had seen a few times. And by seen he meant slept with. They had a quick roll around in the hay and when Victor expressed that perhaps he wanted them to be more than just sex, Dean had packed up and left.  
It had been years ago. Before they settled into this town. He’d met Victor in Chicago, never even told him that he lived in Kansas. So the last place he ever expected to see Victor was The fucking Roadhouse.  
“Dean!” Victor was grinning widely. “How are you man?”  
Dean was still is shock. “I’m pretty good, what about you?” he managed to stammer out, just to be polite.  
“I’m awesome! Man it’s good to see you.” Victor finally seemed to notice Cas, who was sitting opposite Dean, downing another shot of vodka.  
“Oh are you guys on a date?” Victor asked.  
Dean ran his fingers through his hair, he felt to goddamn awkward. “Yeah… we are.” he said.  
Victor gave Cas a once over before smirking. “Lucky you.” he said to Cas, “I could do with a good pounding myself.” and with that, he winked at them and walked off.  
Fuck. Dean had never felt more awkward in his life. Cas looked at him with a questioning gaze. “Dean…” Cas begun, “I’m assuming you have previously slept with that man…” Dean nodded is affirmation, secretly pleased that Cas didn’t seem to be the jealous type. “…but is there a reason for his sexual innuendo about your preferred position during intercourse?”  
Oh god. He had picked up on that. “Well…uhh… It’s just…” Dean signed, “I usually top.”  
Cas seemed surprised at that. And with fair reason, their current dynamic of Cas topping had just seemed right from the very beginning.  
“In fact, I’d only ever bottom once before I met you.”  
Cas’ eyes widened, but he didn’t respond. Dean was getting increasingly worried that Cas was upset with him, because the dark haired man simply wasn’t replying to him.  
“Cas? Cas, you're scaring me.” Dean said. Cas didn’t respond.  
It was like he was frozen in shock. Dean didn’t really think it was that big of a deal, and he no idea how to snap Cas out of it.  
So he paid their bill and they left. He figured getting Cas home was probably the best option. By the time they pulled up at Dean’s apartment Cas still hadn’t said a word. Dean was freaking out by now. He had no idea what was going on in Cas head.  
He closed the apartment door behind them and they stood in awkward silence for a moment until Cas finally spoke.  
“Dean…” he said slowly, “Please tell me I didn’t force you to doing anything you weren’t comfortable with while we were being intimate.”  
Dean was a little taken aback why the question. “What? Cas, of course not.” he exclaimed.  
“Dean, you just told me that you don't bottom, and I’ve been assuming you do. You should have said that you weren’t into that.”  
Did Cas really think Dean hadn’t consented to having sex with him? “Cas, just because I don’t usually bottom, doesn’t mean I’m not into it.”  
Cas was silent for a moment and Dean could pacifically see the gears grinding in his head.  
“You said you’d only ever bottomed once before me…”  
“Yeah… why is that important?”  
“Well the fact that you never did it again means it wasn’t good. Dean, you should have told me you had bad experiences bottoming and I would have at least been more careful.”  
Dean signed. “Cas, it’s fine. It was all fine. I liked everything we did, you didn’t rape…” Cas flinched at the word. “…me.” Dean finished.  
“Dean, I was treating you like you always bottomed. I could have seriously hurt you!”  
Dean could see Cas was absolutely freaking out. And he knew the only way to rely calm him down was to tell him the truth. “My other experience of bottoming was bad.” he said. Cas looked him in the eye at that, still internally panicking. “But not because I was bottoming, it would have still been awful if I had topped.”  
Cas looked even more confused. “Why? What happened?”  
Dean signed, He had never wanted to tell anyone about what happened with Michael. But it seemed like the only way to get Cas to calm down about this. Then he had an idea, if he had to bare his soul in front of this man then the best he could do was get something in return.  
“Tell you what, I’ll tell you this story if you tell me what your tattoos mean.” he proposed.  
Cas looked hesitant. “Dean, the story of these tattoos is extremely personal…” he began.  
Dean cut him off. “And so is this Cas. You wanna know, you've gotta give me soothing in return.  
Cas must have seen in Dean’s eyes how much it meant that Dean was even considering telling him this.  
They were sitting together on the couch when Dean began his story. “I was 16 when it happened.” He began. “Dad and I were out on a hunting trip. Sam was sick, just with the flu, so he was staying with Bobby for a few weeks until he got better. Anyway, we were in this town out in the middle of nowhere and Dad dropped me off at a motel and then left for a month to go do god knows what.” He didn’t look Cas in the eyes as he said that, knowing that there would be a distinct look of pity showing.  
“So I had to look after myself for that month. I started working at this diner in town. Just so I could get some money to stay in the motel until dad came back. There was one other guy my age working there, his name was Michael. We ended up spending a lot of time together, and well, looking back on it now I would say he was probably my first love.”  
Cas stiffened a little bit, obviously not expecting that revelation.  
“So one day I finally got the courage to ask him on a date, after the date we went back to the motel I was staying in and we had sex. It was nice. Not particularly mind-blowing but still pretty good for two 16 year olds. Anyway so, we were lying in the motel bed, completely naked making out, when my dad got back.”  
Dean paused. He really hated reliving this memory. Cas seemed to sense that and he started tracing circles gently on Dean’s thigh in an attempt to calm him down. It worked.  
“Whatever he'd been doing had obviously been a total failure because he came in reeking of whiskey, I’ll never forget that smell. He saw me in bed grinding down on another guy and he flipped his shit. I made sure Michael got out okay, wasn’t too hard because dad went straight for me. I remember him kicking me until I threw up, and hitting me and telling me that he was ruining my pretty face for any other boy.”  
Dean swallowed. Willing himself not to cry.  
“And then he knocked me out. 2 days later Bobby found me. He had figured something was wrong when I hadn’t called in to check on Sam. He found me unconscious and naked, lying in a pile of my own vomit and blood. He took me to the hospital, and then back to his house. That was the first time Bobby tried to get custody of me and Sam. But he couldn't because I wouldn't testify against dad. I know I should have but at the time I just couldn’t.  
They were silent. Dean had more to say but was just waiting for the courage to come to him. Cas seemed to understand this.  
“I bottomed with Michael because I was in love with him. And it wasn’t until I met you that I found another person I was that comfortable with.”  
It wasn't a lie. Dean was far more comfortable around Cas then he had been around anyone in a very long time.  
“I swear Cas, you didn't make me do anything I didn't want to.” Dean said with absolute determination.  
Cas nodded and kissed him. “I believe you Dean.”  
And they sat like that for a moment, Cas was simply letting Dean revel in the comfort he provided. He understood that what he had just heard was something Dean didn't talk about very often and he would need significant time before he could stop reliving the traumatic memory. Cas felt touched that he was the one Dean had chosen to share that part of himself with. It was a higher honour than he himself could ever give to Dean. Dean yawned, so Cas helped him up and half carry him to the bedroom, they stripped down to their boxers and lay in bed together quietly. Then Dean remembered.  
“Now you have to tell me your story Cas.” he informed the dark haired man.  
Cas took in a shaky breath and pulled Dean a little closer, he assumed it fro for comfort.  
“You are about to become one of two people in the world that knows this story, Dean.”  
And suddenly Dean knew why Cas didn’t tell him the first two times he asked. This was the story of how the cult Cas was in fell. It was the story of how Cas came to be the sole survivor.  
“First you must understand that I grew up in a religious commune, more of a cult really. It was very strict. So strict that they wouldn't even teach us to speak English until we were already fluent in Russian, despite the fact that we were in America.”  
Dean couldn’t help but find it just a little but attractive that Cas could speak Russian.  
“Each member of our commune had a specific role to play. Mine was the soldier. As was the role of my two brothers, Gabriel and Balthazar. They were the ones who taught me how to shoot like you saw today. Every day they trained me to skilled in some form of combat.”  
Dean felt a shiver run down his spine. It made a lot of sense that Cas would choose to become an assassin after all this.  
“When I was about 22 years old the leader of our group became more violent, more like a typical cult leader would be I guess. He began disposing of those who couldn’t for fill their duties. That’s what he called it. Disposal, but it was murder. Anna was the first person to stand up to Lucifer…”  
Dean interrupted at that point, he couldn’t help himself. “The leader of your commune was called Lucifer?” he asked. “How could you ever think it was a good idea to follow the command of a guy named Lucifer?”  
Cas scowled a little bit. “Everyone there was named after angels Dean. It is not hard to believe that there would be someone called Lucifer there.”  
“But Anna isn’t an angels name is it?’  
“Her real name was Anael. But she always preferred Anna.”  
Dean apologised for his interruption and allowed Castiel to continue.  
“Anna was the first person to confront Lucifer about what he was doing. He killed her.” Dean flinched. He knew it was coming but it still hadn’t prepared his for the final reveal. He grasped Cas’ hand in an attempt to comfort him.  
“My brothers and I planned a sort of rebellion after that. Lucifer killed Anna and we weren’t going to get him get away with it. Anna was the most pure soul I have ever met. She did not deserve to die that way. Unfortunately, it didn’t go well. There was something similar to a war ranging in the commune and many died. Gabriel and I got all the children out, but every adult was involved somehow and they all died. Every one of them.  
“Lucifer killed Gabriel too. I had to watch that happen. And after that neither Balthazar nor I were ever the same. Somehow Lucifer got to Balthazar’s head. He convinced my brother that I was at fault for Gabriel’s death. Balthazar betrayed me and I was forced to kill him along with Lucifer.”  
Dean was speechless. Cas had been forced to kill his own brother. He thought that perhaps that should make him dislike Cas but it really didn’t. It made him think he was strong. He went through all of that as to protect the innocent people that were in danger.  
“The tattoos are the names of my siblings written in the language of the angels.” Cas absentmindedly placed him hand over the tattoos on his hip bone. “It was the only way I could think to honour them.”  
Dean took a moment to respond. “Wow… Cas, that was… wow.”  
He looked over at his lover. He looked lost. As if he was still trying to decide whether a simple tattoo was enough to pay his respects to the family he had lost.  
“I think your family would appreciate that you did that for them.” Cas smiled at that. Dean pretended he didn’t see the tears that rolled down Cas’ face. They were silent tears, and Dean knew well enough from his own experiences that people only cried silent tears like that when they didn’t want anyone else to see. So he didn’t comment on them. He knew the time for talking was over. So he pulled the smaller man as close as he possibly could and ran his fingers through his hair until Cas fell asleep on his chest.  
Cas was stronger than Dean could ever hope to be. Dean thought he would have died living under the pressure that Cas had. The man may have been an assassin, but after that story Dean knew he killed only because he was good at it, not because he enjoyed it.  
Dean felt closer to Cas then he ever had to anyone else in his entire life. Rationally he knew it was not smart to feel that way about an assassin who was going to take out his brother, but everything about Castiel marveled him.  
And it was then that he realised, with a heavy heart, that even when push came to shove, he would never be able to kill Castiel.  
He was in love with him.


	9. The call that changed it all

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas gets a call from Crowley telling him to speed things up.
> 
> Also the title of this chapter rhymes, go me!

Castiel was still wrapped up in Dean when he woke. His head pressed to Dean’s chest and Dean’s fingers were still entwined with his hair. At some point in the night Cas’ legs and become all tangled up in Dean’s and he knew that there probably wasn’t a way to get up without waking up his lover. But Castiel was content to just lie there more the moment. He thought back to the previous night. He had told Dean the truth. He had never told anyone the truth. And yet he had barely hesitated when Dean had asked him too. And what was even better, is that Dean hadn't run away. Castiel had told him that he had brutally murdered his own brother and Dean had stayed with him. He had comforted him. Castiel didn’t think there were many people in the world who would have done that. He was lucky to have found Dean. And what more, Dean had told him about his father. He had been curious about that for sometime. Dean’s truth made a large amount of things understandable, and yet Cas couldn’t say he was happy with the story. That incident with his father had clearly impacted Dean over the course of his whole life, and Castiel found himself wishing that John Winchester was alive, just so he could kill him.  
He looked over at his green eyed lover and started trying to count the freckles that peppered the skin on his face and abdomen. He’d attempted this feat before, but Dean never stayed still for long enough. Cas found himself getting quite hot, he could feel the slight, damp layer of sweat between him and the oldest Winchester, but he was comfortable so he just kept counting.  
He was so absorbed in his counting that he didn’t notice Dean wake up.  
“Cas?” Dean mumbled sleepily, “What are you doing there?”  
Cas didn't take his eyes off Dean’s chest. “Counting your freckles.” He replied simply.  
Dean chuckled, “And how many are their Angel?” Angel. Cas liked it when Dean called him that. A warm feeling spread though Cas’ body as he thought how much better that name sounded coming from Dean than all the other men who used it when they hired him for a job. Cas thought there was probably some sort of underlying message hidden in why he liked his lover calling him by his official assassins title, but he didn’t have time to think about the reason before replying.  
“You made me loose count.” Cas grumbled. Dean hadn't really done anything. Cas had just gotten distracted by the muscles of Dean’s abdomen and forgotten why he was actually looking there.  
Dean threw his head back and laughed. Cas felt a slight swell of proud that he had been the one to elicit that beautiful sound from the taller man. Dean was still smiling when he pulled Cas into a kiss. A smile that Cas returned as he also returned the kiss.  
It was a soft kiss. Deep and tender, and yet still passionate without the obvious battle for dominance. They stayed like that for a few moments, just lying in each others arms and kissing. It was strange act for both of them. It was a loving gesture with no ulterior motives. They weren’t trying to seduce each other, they were just comfortable in each others presence. It was something that neither of them had ever experienced before. Sex had always been just sex for the both of them. For Cas because he never stayed in one place long enough to get attached, and for Dean because he alway ran away before things got too serious. But the pure affection of the moment had them both questioning why they’d ever thought they'd be better off alone.  
“Cas, I’ve gotta get ready for work.” Dean said quietly when he pulled away.  
Cas groaned and tightened his grip on Dean. “Can’t you just quit and stay with me all the time?” Cas said, only really half joking.  
Dean huffed a laugh at that. “I wish, Angel.” They kissed for almost another 10 minutes before Dean finally pried himself from Castiel’s arms claiming that he would be late for work if he didn't get going.  
Cas lay back on the bed and made no attempt you hide his staring as Dean got dressed. He didn’t think he would ever get over how perfect Dean’s body was. Even covered with his little scars, Cas didn’t think he could be anymore beautiful.  
Dean noticed of course. “Why’re you staring at me Cas?” he asked shyly.  
Cas hopped out of the bed and pressed a small kiss to Dean’s forehead. “You are so beautiful.” he said.  
A scarlet blush spread across Dean’s features and he pulled Cas into a quick hug before making him promise to still be at the apartment when he got home from work and then heading out for the day.  
Cas watched Dean leave though the front door and couldn’t help but think that something that changed between the two of them. He thought it made sense after last night, they had both shared their deepest secret with the other, quite possibly for the first time for both of them. They had a bond now. A profound bond that linked them deeper than Castiel ever thought he would ever be linked with anyone. And sitting on the couch of Dean’s apartment, Castiel realised that he was madly in love with the oldest Winchester.  
Having realised this, he decided that he would finalise everything for the brothers over the next few days and then he would make sure they were safe. Safe from Crowley, and even safe from himself. Killing either of them was off the table, he wasn’t even going to consider it anymore. He was dreading the conversation where he would have to tell both the Winchesters who he really was. He knew they would not react well. And it hurt his heart a little bit to think that Dean might hate him, but he thought it would be well justified.  
They found of his cell phone ringing jolted him out of his thoughts. He frowned, the only person he could thin of that would be calling right now would be Crowley.  
So he answered. “I thought I told you not to call this number.” he greeted harshly.  
He was met with an equally as harsh response. “and I thought you were good enough at your job to have Sam Winchester in a ditch by now.”  
Cas signed. “I’m doing it. That is the main point here Crowley.”  
Crowley was clearly not happy. “No, Angel…” the name definitely didn’t sound as nice now that it wasn’t coming from Dean, “…the main point is I need Dean Winchester for a job tomorrow night, and that means I need Sam dead before the day is over.”  
What? Castiel’s entire plan was based around the fact that he hadn’t been given a deadline and therefore he had the time to get everything he need to make sure they were safe.  
“I didn’t give you a deadline, because I’d heard you were good enough to have it done by now!” Cas hated the way Crowley talked down at him and decided that one day he would kill the insolent British man.  
He was silent for a moment. He needed to stop talking to Crowley and start making a new plan. “It will be done Crowley. Now do not call again.” And he hung up.

To say Castiel was freaking out would be a huge understatement. He didn’t have long. He would tell Dean everything when he got back from work at 5:00, which gave him abut 6 hours to sort out everything he needed. It was next to impossible, but he would find a way to do it for Dean.  
He went to his bag and just spread everything out on Dean’s dining room table, for the next few hours he called every single one of his contacts trying to find a way to get new identities for the brothers by the end of the night. He had all his weapons spread out on one side of the table and on the other side was covered in various documents, from the bank statements that claimed payments for his hits, to the several aliases and different national passports he possessed.  
He was struggling. It wasn’t that he didn’t the resources or the connections, he just lacked the time to get everything together. He needed go get his shit together, if he couldn't pull this off then Sam and Dean could die.  
He sighed and decided that he needed to have a shower, just to relieve some stress and clear his head. He was no good to anyone when he was flustered like this.  
Unfortunately, being in the shower meant that he didn’t hear Dean enter the apartment when he got home from work early. 

…

 

Dean wasn’t sure what he was doing anymore. The morning with Cas had been something new for him, and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t love it. In fact, Dean found himself craving it. He wasted to wake up to that every single day. Quite possibly for the rest of his life.  
He knew it was crazy. The guy was a fucking assassin. And Dean had no clue what was going on in his lovers head, he didn’t know what Cas was planning to do. He needed to talk to him. So Dean vowed that he was going to tell Cas the truth when he got home from work. He was going to tell him that he knew what he was, and why he was in Lawrence. And more importantly, he would tell Cas about how he feels about him. And if Cas returned those feelings even in the slightest, then Dean would find a way around it. They could find a way to deal with Crowley later, because if Dean had the option, he was never letting go of his angel.  
His Angel. He liked that. It sounded so much better than the title of an assassin. He had internally cringed when he had called Cas angel in bed that morning, thinking maybe it would tip his off to the fact that Dean knew his identity. But if anything, Cas had seemed to like it.  
Dean worked all morning with this sense of dread in his stomach. He knew that there was no living person in the world who had seen Cas, or even knew him as more than The Angel. There was a very good chance that his plan would backfire and both him and his brother would end up dead.  
Sam. Should he call Sam and tell him what was going on? No, Dean thought he would call him after he spoke to Cas. Sam was not going to happy that Dean had put both their lives on the line. In fact, the lives of the Winchester brothers now fully depended on whether or not Cas had formed a connection with Dean the way Dean had with him. One positive, Dean though, was that if Cas rejected him, at least he wouldn’t be alive long enough to feel the staggering blow it would be to his heart.  
Dean worked as well as he could all morning until his nerves simply got the best of him. He asked Bobby if he could leave early and, as expected, Bobby agreed. He gave Dean a curious look and Dean knew he was getting suspicious. Dean didn’t take time off work, he loved his job and hated missing it for any reason. Bobby knew that, and so he knew that if Dean wanted time off then it was a pretty serious matter and he quickly agreed. Dean gave him a pleading look begging him not to ask, so Bobby sent him on his way without question.  
On the drive home, Dean could feel his hands getting clammy. He was sweating and his breathing had quickened a little bit. He was more nervous than he had ever been before in his life. He had been in life or death situations before, but never where the perpetrator was the love of his life.  
He couldn’t help but wonder what things would have been like if they'd met out side the whole mob scene. He wondered if he would have still been drawn to Castiel the way he had been. He thought he would have been. There had been something enticing about him right from the beginning. He liked to think that he would have still easily fallen for the blue eyed man and that Cas would have easily fallen for him and that they would have had their happily ever after.  
But Dean wan’t naive enough to believe his life was a fairytale and he already knew that he was never lucky enough to get the things he wanted desperately. But still, he prayed to a god he didn’t believe in that just this once he wouldn’t get the short straw.  
He opened the door to his apartment. “Cas?” he called out. He heard the shower going and realised Cas must be in here and therefore, unable to hear him. He walked into the kitchen and the first thing he noticed, scattered across the bench, were weapons. Obviously belonging to the assassin. There was a rather large collection there and Dean found himself wondering where Cas hard kept all this stuff over the last few days. There were a few different guns, as well as silencers for them all. Similarly, there were knives. Small ones that looked like they could be easily concealed and accessible when needed. There was also thing one other weapon, not a knife, a blade would be the more adequate description. A shiver ran down his spine. He wasn’t going to lie, it was rather intimidating to know that Cas could wield every single one of these weapons and more than likely had on several occasions.  
Then it hit him. Why were the weapons out on the table? There was only one viable explanation that Dean could think of. Castiel was planning on carrying out the hit very soon, possibly today even.  
Dean’s first instinct was to protect his brother. It was to run out of the apartment and grab his brother and just drive until he felt that they were safe. He almost did exactly that, but Cas wasn’t some thug. He was a highly paid hit man and if he had decided that Sam was to die then there wasn’t much Dean could do to stop him. Running would only mean that they would be chased. And Dean had a life here, he didn’t want to back to living out of the impala. And he knew his brother wouldn’t want that either. So he decided that he was going to stand his ground. He was going to talk to Castiel and tell him the truth just like he came here to do in the first place.  
He was even more nervous than before now. He had realised that there was little to no chance that he was getting out of this alive. But he just needed Cas to know the truth, and for himself to know that he did all he could do to prevent it short of killing the man he loved, because he knew he just couldn’t do that.  
Dean heard the shower turn off and knew that he only had a few minutes. If he was being perfectly honest, he could already feel hot tears prickling bend his eyes at the prospect of Castiel confirming his two suspicions. Firstly, that he and Sam were going to die, and secondly, that Cas did not love him. Dean couldn’t help but chuckle at how, even though he was literally about to die, the only thing he could think about was how Cas didn’t love him.  
And then he heard footsteps. “Dean?” he heard Cas say in a confused voice. “Why are you home early?”


	10. The big decision

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They finally start being honest with each other.

Cas stepped out of the shower feeling a little better. He was still majorly stressing out but he felt a little more refreshed now. He started to make him way back to the kitchen, mentally planning what he would need to organise next. He had a place that the brothers could stay that was out of state. They would only be able to stay there for a few days before he would have to get them out of the country. But that would buy him more time, and that was what he really needed. So he decided that his next order of business would be to fid a way to get them out of Lawrence without Crowley noticing.  
He abruptly stopped walking when he entered the kitchen. Dean was there. Dean was home from work early and was standing right next to all his assassin equipment.  
Fuck.  
“Dean?” he asked cautiously. “Why are you home early?”  
Dean met his eyes. He looked hurt. In fact, he looked as though he were about to cry. Cas was a little confused by that. He was expecting Dean to be angry, not upset.  
“I finished work early so I could come and talk to you about something important.” Dean said.  
Cas was even more confused about how Dean wasn’t asking him about the weapons or the documents that littered him kitchen table. “…okay? What is it, Dean?” he asked quietly.  
Dean took a deep breath, Cas could clearly see he was very nervous, and that only made Castiel more nervous too. “I know who you are Angel.”  
What?  
“And I know what you do.”  
What?  
How could Dean has possibly known that? How long had he known it for? Castiel was in shock. He didn’t speak, he just stared, wide eyed, at the other man. There was silence for a few moments until Cas finally said something.  
“How long?” he asked. He wasn’t going to deny it. Hell, he had been planning on telling Dean himself that night.  
“Since the start.” Dean replied awkwardly. Cas furrowed his brow, if Dean had known who he was since the start why would he ever get involved? Did he know about Sam?  
“How…?” he couldn’t even get the whole question out he was too shocked at this reveal.  
Dean sat down at the kitchen table, his body was tense and Cas could tell he was still nervous. He wasn’t looking at Cas anymore.  
“Well, I went to see Crowley but instead of talking to him… I just overheard him on the phone talking to an assassin titled ‘The Angel’, ordering a hit on my baby brother.”  
So he did know about Sam. Cas closed his eyes, willing himself not to cry as Dean inevitably told him that none of what they shared was real.  
“So I did some research on the guy… And I found out that the best was to identify him was to see if he had Angel wings tattooed on his back.”  
Suddenly a lot made sense. “So you decided to seduce me in order to see if I possessed such a tattoo…” he whispered.  
Dean nodded stiffly. “My original plan was to kill you before you could get to Sammy.”  
Cas was starting to shake as we desperately tried to hold back tears. “Why didn’t you then?” he asked.  
Dean met his eyes again. “honestly, I was waiting for you to actually pose a significant threat before I did anything.”  
Cas understood everything now. And it hurt. It hurt more than he ever thought it possible could. “So everything we’ve done since we met was a ploy to keep me close to you so you assess when I would be a threat to your brother.”  
Dean apparently didn’t like that accusation. “Hey! Don’t shift the blame to me, you only started this thing up to get closer to Sam.”  
And now, Castiel didn’t like Dean’s accusation. “Dean Winchester, I am extremely good at what I do, and your brother is not exactly a high profile target. I could have very easily completed this job without involving you.”  
Dean went quite after that, He looked almost thoughtful. As if he hadn’t actually considered that as a possibility.  
Cas signed. “I don’t make a habit of getting involved with the people close to my target, Dean.” He said.  
Dean looked surprised. Had he really thought, this entire time, that Cas was only with him to get close to Sam?  
When Dean finally spoke up, he spoke quietly. “Why was I the exception?”  
Cas figured the only thing he could really do now was tell the truth. “I liked you.”  
His words hung in the air for a moment and Cas braced himself for the inevitable rejection.  
Dean sighed. “Yeah, I liked you too.”  
Cas snapped his head up in confusion. That was not what he was excepting at all.  
It was only then that he noticed that Dean had tears in his eyes too. “I can’t kill you, Cas. I just can’t.” Cas followed Dean’s line of slight and realised Dean was looking at the collection of weapons on the table. “So I’m gonna do something I never thought I would.” Dean finally looked up at him. “Cas, Please don’t kill my brother. I am begging you, please.”  
Oh. Thats what Dean thought. He thought the weapons were out because he was planning on using them.  
“Oh Dean.” Castiel could see a single tear escape from Dean’s green eyes. “I decided I wasn’t going to do that days ago.”  
Dean’s expression changed to something that resembled hope. “Really?”  
“Yes Dean, I’ve been trying to organise new identities for you and your brother so I get you both away from Crowley.”  
Dean let out a sigh of relief. There were still tears streaming down him face, but he was smiling now. He got up and pulled Cas into a tight hug. Cas held him close. Dean felt so perfect in his arms. They stayed like that for longer than either of them realised. And then Cas remembered Crowley’s call that morning.  
“Dean I got a call from Crowley this morning. He wants the job done by tonight.” Dean’s expression changed to match the horrified one that Cas wore.  
“What does that mean for us?” he asked  
Cas frantically started searching through all the documents on the table. “I haven’t had time to get you passports yet, but I have a safe house out of state. You’ll have you get Sam and the two of you need to leave tonight.”  
“I’ll call Sam now and tell him to come over.” Cas nodded and went back to his organising. He couldn’t help but feel happy at the way Dean just accepted him. He wasn’t mad. And now that he had Dean on his side, it would be earlier to get everything done in time.

 

…

 

“Hey Dean, whats up?”  
“Hey Sammy, do you think you could come over?”  
“What, now?”  
“Yeah now.”  
Sam paused for a moment. “Is everything alright Dean? Bobby told me that you left early today.”  
Dean rolled his eyes. “Of course he did,” he muttered. “Look Sam, I’ll explain everything when you get here.”  
He could sense Sam’s nerves and uncertainty, but regardless, his brother agreed. “Okay Dean, I’ll be over soon.”  
“Okay, bye Sammy.”  
Dean turned back to Cas. He was still frantically rummaging through papers. Only now he was on the phone too. He was in a pretty heated conversation about something, Dean didn’t know what since Cas was talking in Russian. Which, if Dean was being honest, was really quite hot. Dean could help but smile at the obvious amount of trouble Cas was going to make sure he and Sam were safe. If he doubted castiel’s affections for him before, he definitely didn’t now.  
Cas ended his phone call and stressfully ran his hands over his face with a groan. Things clearly weren’t going the way he wanted them to. Dean came up behind him, and wrapped him arms around the smaller man. Cas leaned into the touch.  
“Everything okay?”  
Cas sighed. “No.” he said, “I can’t get this all done in time, Dean.” He was clearly getting very frustrated.  
“It’s okay Angel. Sam’s on his way. We’ll figure this out together.”  
“No Dean. It’s not okay. If I can’t do this then y-you’ll d-die.” Dean’s heart tightened in his chest at the way Castiel’s voice cracked at that last part. He sounded broken.  
Dean just pulled him into a kiss. He wasn’t worried for his life. Or even for Sam’s. Not anymore. He had Castiel on his side and that was all he ever needed. And even if Cas was freaking out, Dean knew that the two of them could take on the world together if the need arose.  
And that was how Sam found them, merely a few minutes later.  
“Umm… guys…” he stammered awkwardly.  
Cas and Dean broke away from each other.  
“Sam, I’m glad you're here.” Cas said.  
Sam frowned. “What’s going on?”  
Cas opened his mouth, but then hesitated and closed it again. He had never been great with people and was unsure how to tell someone that a hit had been ordered on them.  
Dean understood this and took over the explanation. “In simple terms Sammy, Crowley ordered a hit on you after you fucked up out last run.”  
“oh” Sam’s eyes darted nervously to Cas, obviously unsure as to how much he could say around the man.  
“Cas knows everything.” Dean told him.  
Sam’s eyes widened, “You told him everything?”  
And here it was, the even bigger reveal. “I didn’t have to…” he said.  
Sam squinted his eyes, “What do you mean?”  
Now it was Dean’s turn to hesitate and Cas’ turn to interrupt.  
“It was I who Crowley hired to kill you Sam.” he said  
There was a tense silence for a moment until Sam spoke up.  
“What the fuck?” he exclaimed. “Dean did you know that the whole time.”  
“Yeah Sammy, I did.”  
“And you didn’t think to tell me?” Sam was angry. Dean thought that was fair enough.  
Cas understood that they would have to talk about this eventually but they just didn’t have time for an argument now.  
“Sam, I understand you are angry and both your brother and I, but unfortunately we don’t have tome for this right now.”  
“He’s right Sammy.” Dean inputted, “Crowley wants you dead by the end of the day.”  
“I’ve organised a safe house for the two of you. You should both leave as soon as possible.” Cas began.  
Sam snorted. “And why should we trust you? Huh? How do we know that your not louring us there for Crowley?”  
“Sam don’t be ridiculous.” Dean growled.  
“What? Dean he’s an assassin and you're defending him? What the fuck man?”  
“It’s not a trap Sam, just drop it. He's trying to save our lives.”  
Sam huffed a laugh at that and Dean cleaned his jaw. He didn’t like Sam’s accusations. There was another tense silence.  
“Dean, Is this really what you want?” Sam asked quietly. “We just settled down here. Do you really want to go back to living out of motels and the backseat of your car?”  
No, of course he didn’t. But he preferred it to dying at the hands of Crowely.  
“Actually…” Cas replied before Dean had the chance, “You would be leaving the country as soon as I can organise passports for the two of you.”  
“What?” Both the Winchester’s asked.  
“It would be the only way to ensure that Crowley never finds you again.”  
Dean wasn’t happy about that. Logically it made sense, but Dean didn't like it. And then it occurred to Dean, that in all of this, Cas had never once even hinted that he would be coming with them. But before he could ask Cas what he planned to do, Sam spoke.  
“No.” he said firmly.  
Cas raised an eyebrow at that.  
“Are we really going to let him drive us out of the country?”  
“What else can we do Sammy?” Dean asked.  
“We can fight back Dean.” Sam proclaimed. “This man ruined out lives once, are we really going to let him do it again? He’s controlled us for the last 7 years and I’m done Dean.”  
Dean sighed. As much as he hated to admit it, Sam was right. Dean had always hated the idea of not being in control of his own life. Hell, he and Sam had even got tattoos that were a proclamation of the independence Crowley had taken away from them.  
He looked from his desperate brother, to his worried lover and he made his choice.  
“He’s right.” He said.  
Cas let out an exasperated sign. “Dean, that is suicide.”  
“I don’t care Cas. I’d rather die now than spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder, waiting for Crowley to be there.”  
He walked around and picked up his duffle bag and then opened it up on the kitchen table, displaying the collection of weapons he’d had obtained since beginning work with Crowley. The collection in the duffle bag, along with Castiel’s stuff and the arsenal under the fake bottom in the boot of the impala, meant they had more than enough resources to stage an attack if the wished to do so.  
“So what do you say? Wanna kill Crowley and take down the mob?” He asked with a grin.  
Sam nodded and returned his smirk. But Cas sighed. “Dean, it’s not safe. Do either of you have any sense of self preservation?”  
Dean stopped smiling and walked over to Cas. He was touched that Cas was so worried about him but he knew he had to do this. He cupped Cas’ face in his hands, “Cas, Sam and I have never really been safe.” Sam nodded in agreement, “and we never will be as long as Crowley is alive. We have to do this.”  
Cas sighed in defeat and Dean pulled him into a hug. He heard Cas speak into the crook of his neck. “Do you need my help?”  
Dean pulled back. “You’re willing to help?”  
“Of course I am Dean, I would be more than happy to end the life of Fergus Crowley.”  
Dean laughed. He wasn’t worried in the slightest now that be knew Cas was going to be helping them.  
It was then that Sam decided to input his 2 cents. “Umm… Dean?”  
“Yeah Sammy?’  
“I don’t want him to help us.”  
Dean started at his brother as if he was utterly crazy. “Sam, we’re going up against the fucking mob. We need all the help we can get.”  
“I know that. But I don’t trust him. It’s not everyday that you meet an assassin who just magically changes sides and decides not the kill you.”  
“Sam, he’s risking his life for us. Isn’t that enough?”  
“And why the fuck would he be doing that when he was the one hired to take our lives.” Sam’s voice was rising now.  
“Actually,” Cas said, matter-of -factly, “I was given very strict instructions not to harm Dean.”  
“Oh great, that makes everything better.” Sam said sarcastically. “Why are you helping us anyway?”  
Cas looked over at Dean. He was silent for a moment, then he replied. “You don’t deserve this life.” he said, without taking his eyes off the oldest Winchester.  
Sam seemed a little taken aback and didn’t respond immediately. Then, he turned to his brother. “I still don’t trust him and I don’t want him here.”  
“Well too bad, because I do.”  
“Why Dean? You've know what he was this whole time, how can you trust him?”  
“Will you stop talking about him like his an animal.”  
Sam laughed a sarcastic laugh. “He’s not an animal Dean, He’s a monster.”  
Dean was fuming now. How dare he speak about Cas that way.  
He turned to his lover and couldn’t help but notice how small Cas looked. His shoulders were slumped and he was looking down at the ground. Dean’s anger flared again as he thought about Sam being the one to put that ashamed and self-loathing expression on the beautiful man’s face.  
“Cas, can you give Sam and I a moment alone?” he asked quietly.  
“Of course Dean.” Cas replied, and without looking up, he walked out of the kitchen.  
Dean turned to his brother.  
“How dare you.” He was so angry we couldn’t even formulate a sentence beyond that.  
“Are you fucking kidding me Dean? He was literally hired to kill me.”  
“And now he's trying to save you, you ungrateful bastard.”  
“Why are you getting do defensive Dean? He's a murderer.”  
Dean was done, he was so close to slamming his fist into his brothers face. “He doesn’t kill because he likes it, he kills because it what he was trained to do his entire life.”  
“What they fuck are you talking about man?”  
“He was raised to be a solider, Sam! Is that really any different to how dad raised us? The only difference is we had each other. Cas has no one.”  
Sam was silent. He knew Dean was right, there wasn’t much difference in their upbringing. All three of them had been trained in combat as children, without actually wanting to be.  
“How can you trust him so much though?” Sam asked quietly, almost as if he was desperately trying to understand his brothers motives.  
“I love him.” Dean said simply.  
Sam just stared at his bother. Dean never said that. Not about anyone. And Sam understood that if Dean trusted Cas with his heart then it wasn’t much of a difficulty to trust him with his life. Sam also saw how important it was for Dean to have Castiel backing him up on this mission.  
“Fine.” Sam signed, “He can help us. But I still don’t trust him.”  
Dean have a small smile. “Thanks Sammy.” It still wasn’t the response he was hoping for, but he would take it and hopefully after they pulled this off with Cas’ help, Sam would trust him too. “You can come back in now Cas.” He called out and his voice echoed through the house.  
A few moments later Cas came in with a look of determination on his face. “I need to call Crowley.” he said.  
He got his phone out and rung Crowley’s number. He put the phone on loudspeaker and gestured for the brothers to stay quiet.  
“Angel, is the job done?” Dean had to remind himself that Crowley calling Cas ‘Angel’ was an official tittle rather than a term of endearment.  
Cas ignored Crowley’s question. “Mr. Crowley, when you first hired me you told me that the Winchesters were closer than anyone you’d ever seen, and my observations over the last few days concur with that assessment. So, do you really think you're going to be able to get Dean Winchester to run a job for you the day after he finds out his brother, his best friend, has been brutally murdered?”  
Crowley didn’t reply, before he made a quite admission, “I didn’t think of that.”  
“No of course you didn’t…” Dean still couldn’t help but smile at the way Cas sassed the mob boss. “…I have come up with a plan.”  
“I’m listening.” Crowley said with interest, repeating the words the assassin had said to him during their first phone call.  
“Call Dean later tonight, tell him you have a job for him tomorrow. Also tell him that you sent Sam out on a job this morning. Tell him it was urgent so neither of you had the time to inform him. But the most important thing is, you have to tell him that he wont be able to talk to his brother for a few days due to this job. I’ll take care of Sam by the end of the night, and Dean won’t realise until after he’s already done the job tomorrow. And by the time he does realise, I’ll be gone and he’ll never be able to trace the hit back to you.”  
Dean was impressed. Cas’ plan made a lot of sense, and if he hadn’t been in on it then he probably would have fallen for it.  
“You’re smart Angel. Looks like you've just made up for how slow you've been in completing this job.”  
Dean saw Castiel jaw clench as the insult.  
“yes I’m sorry for that inconvenience.” Cas said with obvious sarcasm. “I shall call again when its done.”  
And he hung up.  
“Okay so now that Crowley thinks that, what are we actually going to do?” Sam asked.  
“We’re going to break into his compound tonight and kill him and all this men.” Cas said simply.  
Dean could tell was in the zone now. He had turned of his soldiers senses and was ready for action. In Dean was being honest, he was a little bit intimidated by the detachment evident in his lovers eyes.  
He knew Crowley didn’t stand a chance.  
“The hardest part of this will be making sure it can’t be traced back to us, I’m not worried about me because Crowley has only ever heard my voice and he doesn’t know my name, but is there anything that he has that would drag you into the police investigation?” Cas asked the two of them.  
“Just our contract.” Sam said.  
“He could have some stuff on dad, I’m not sure though.” Dean added.  
“Okay, well once we’re in there it will be Sam’s job to find any documents he can that link you both to the mob.” Sam nodded his assent at that. Dean was glad his brother had given up arguing because it was clear that Cas knew exactly what he was doing when it came to planning this stuff.  
“Dean, you and I will take out as many people as we can while Sam does that.”  
“And what would be the best way to do that?” Dean asked, knowing that efficiently was key here.  
“Stealth.” Cas replied, “We are relying on the element of surprise here, we have to do all we can to not alert Crowley of our presence.”  
They all agreed that was the best possible approach. They spent the rest of the afternoon getting things ready. Cas fitted them all up with a silencer for the preferred weapons, he even had one that fit the colt so Dean could have that with him.  
And then Crowley called Dean just like Cas told him to. And he said exactly what Cas had told him to.  
Dean knew that they had Crowley exactly where they needed him. There was no way he would be expecting any sort of attack from them. And there was absolutely no way he would think Cas was working with them.  
Dean was more than ready to end Crowley once and for all.


	11. The Break In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They break into Crowley's compound for the job.

It was starting to get late. They had agreed to wait until it was dark before they stormed Crowley’s place, decided that is was their best bet with the whole ‘element of surprise’ thing. So they were really just killing time now.  
Dean wanted to talk to Cas. To talk to him alone. But Sam was keeping a very watchful eye of the angel. He could still feel the distrust radiating from his brother, but Dean was glad that he wasn’t causing arguments now. Still, he kind of needed him brother out of the way. He wanted to tell Cas how he felt before this all went down, just in case something happened. He knew that if something happened to Cas, his biggest regret would be not telling Cas that he loves him.  
“Dean, there is literally no food here.” Sam said irritably, as he closed the fridge door.  
And then Dean had an idea. “Then why don’t you go out and pick us up something?” He asked his brother, although it was more a request as than an actual question.  
“Ugh do I have to?” Sam complained.  
The older Winchester game his brother a look which very clearly said, Do as I fucking tell you.  
“Okay, okay.” Sam stood up and grabbed his car keys, “Pizza fine?”  
Dean nodded. Sam looked over at Cas for his affirmation, but the hit man was too absorbed in his plans to even notice that the conversation was taking place. Dean answered for his lover and Sam set off out the door.  
“Hey Cas?”  
“Yes Dean?” Cas still didn’t look up from all this documents.  
“I wanted to talk to you before Sam gets back?”  
“Oh, Sam’s gone out?” Dean rolled his eyes. He wondered if Cas got like this before all of his missions.  
“Yeah, he went to get us dinner.”  
“oh… well I hope he doesn’t run into any of Crowley’s men.”  
Dean hadn't thought of that. But he knew Sam could hold his own so he wasn’t too worried about his little brother.  
Cas still wasn’t look away from the documents, so Dean walked up to him, put the papers down on the table and took Castiel’s hand in his own.  
“Dean…” Castiel murmured. “I’m doing everything I can Dean. Everything I can to make sure you and your brother are safe.”  
“I know you are angel.” Dean relied softy. “We couldn’t do this without you. When this of over, Sam and I will be able to walk around freely for the first time ever. And it will be because of you.” If we survive that is. The last part wasn’t spoken out loud, but they both heard it all the same.  
“Cas…” Dean continued, “if everything goes right, what’s gonna happen to you afterwards?”  
“Well…” Cas started, “hopefully my incompetence as an assassin doesn’t get out because of this, that would be very detrimental if I wanted to continue in my line of work.”  
“And do you?” Dean asked him, “Want to continue in your line or work?”  
Castiel was quite. “I’m not sure…” he said after a moment.  
Dean nodded his understanding, and then he asked another question. A question that he’d thought abut a bit but was only now gaining the courage to ask. “If we get though this, would you stay?” he asked quietly. “Here? With us?”  
Cas gave him a sad smile. “I don’t think Sam would like that very much.”  
Dean honestly didn’t care if Sam liked that or not. If Cas wanted to stay, then Dean was going to let him. “With me then?” he asked.  
Cas looked a little surprised at that. “Is that what you want Dean?”  
Dean pulled Cas closer. “Cas, I want everything I can possibly get with you.”  
Cas smiled at that. Dean liked being the reason for that smile. “Then yes.” He said. “I will stay.” If we survive that is. And there it was again. That final comment that both of them thought but neither said out loud. Dean hated that thought. He wanted to fight it, to fight for them. He had never wanted anything more than he wanted Cas and the thought that he might lose that tore him to shreds.  
But he pushed that thought aside and decided to make use of the time they had alone. He pulled Cas into a fiery kiss. Cas seemed on board with Dean’s plan because he kissed back with an intensity that stunned them both. And not a moment later, they were rushing to Dean’s bedroom, pulling each others clothes off along the way, so that by the time they actually made it too the bed, they were both only wearing a pair of Dean’s boxers. Dean still couldn’t get over how good Cas looked in his clothes.  
Cas was sitting up on the bed, with his back against the bed post, Dean straddled his hips and lent in for another kiss. Soon they were grinding on each other in desperation, but the thin material of their underwear was still in the way. Dean quickly rid them both of those pesky little things and reached over to grab the lube from the top draw. As much as he wanted to savour this moment, as it could possibly be their last, they had no idea when Sam would be getting back and Dean didn’t think his brother would appreciate being mentally scared.  
When Dean made his way back to Cas, he straddled his thighs rather than his hips. Cas looked a little confused as that but Dean gave him a look of assurance. He knew Cas like to tease, they would never be done quick enough if he let Cas prep him. So he just decided to do it himself.  
He slicked up his fingers with lube and pressed them into his tight hole. One at first, but soon two and then even sooner three. Cas gasped and moaned as soon as he realised what Dean was doing.  
“Fuck Dean…” he groaned at the sight of Dean working his fingers in and out of himself. “You look so hot like this.” Cas’ hand’s were kneading his thigh muscles, Dean was grateful because they held him in place and his fingers hit his prostate and he jolted a little bit as he moaned from the spike of pleasure.  
He decided he’d had enough of prepping himself now, he probably could have gone a little longer but he never really did mind the burning sensation of Cas filling him up.  
He pulled his fingers free and almost whined at the loss, but he knew there was something much better to come. He gabbed the lube once more and this time, slicked up Cas’ hard cock and gave it a few pumps that had Cas letting out the most beautiful moans, before lining it up with his hole and sinking down. They both moaned as Cas filled Dean right to the brim. Dean Gave himself a moment, distracting them both with a desperate messy kiss, and then he slowly starting moving.  
Cas’ hand’s were on his hips and his were on Castiel’s shoulders and the back of his neck, they were leaning close to each other. There foreheads were almost touching as were their lips, they were sharing the same air and swallowing up each others moans. Cas was rocking his hips slowing upwards and meeting Dean as he came down hard on Castiel’s cock. Dean liked this position, liked seeing Cas loose it because of him.  
Dean was starting to feel a pressure building up inside him, so he moved one hand from around Castiel’s neck, down to his neglected cock. He moaned as soon as contact was made and he felt Cas’ grasp on him tighten. Cas sat up and moved even closer to his lover, his hand’s were now around Dean’s waist, effectively locking Dean in place so he could no longer ride Cas like his very own prized pony. Dean whined as being immobile and unable to move, but Cas just chucked and started sucking on Dean’s neck.  
Dean would never get over how unobviously strong Cas was. He wasn’t a very big guy, but at that moment he was hold Dean exactly were he wanted him and there was nothing Dean could do about it, not that he really wanted to. Cas’ breath was hot on his neck and he begin thrusting up into Dean.  
Dean cried out Castiel’s name as he clung to his lover with one hand and furiously pumped his cock with the other. They were both close now, Dean knew it wouldn’t be long.  
“Are you going to come for me Dean?” The blonde man moaned at his lovers words. Cas’ sex voice did fucking Crazy things to Dean and he honestly thought the he could probably come just from Cas talking dirty.  
Dean was too far gone to form a proper response for he just moaned and desperately nodded his head. Cas huffed laugh at that and then sucked another red mark to Dean’s throat.  
He leaned in and Dean shivered and the sound of Castiel’s panting in his ear. “Then come.” he commanded. And Dean did.  
Cas was unrelenting as he fucked Dean through his orgasm and soon followed his lover with a long chant of Dean’s name.  
And as they come down from their high, wrapped in each others arms, Dean could almost pretend that there wasn’t the possibility of Dean losing him before the night was over.  
There was quiet for a moment and then there was a banging on Dean’s bedroom door.  
“Are you two done in there?” Sam called out, “Dinners here.”  
Dean burst out laughing, Cas looked horrified.  
“This won’t make his dislike me more, will it?” Cas looked genuinely upset at the prospect.  
“Nah, doubt it.” Dean replied, kissing Cas softly on his forehead. “Even if it does, he’s just gonna have to suck it up and start getting used to you being around.”  
Cas smiled at that. It was a small smile, almost shy. Dean wondered how many times someone had actually told Cas they loved him. Or ever expressed a desire for his to stay with them. He got the feeling it wasn’t a common occurrence. Cas hadn’t mentioned anything about his parents in his story, so he got the feeling that maybe his sister Anna would have been the only one to ever really show affection to him. It broke Dean’s heart a little bit and he made a promise to himself that when this was all over he would find a way to make up for any lost time.  
They got dressed quickly and came out to find that Sam had already set everything up for them.  
“Thanks Sammy.” Dean said with a grin as he dug into the food. Sam rolled him eyes, both at Dean and at the way the two lovers were eating slowing in order to avoid letting go of each others hands.  
And then dinner was over. And so was the pleasant part of their night. Cas went into Dean’s room and came out wear all black. His outfit kind of reminded Dean of a sort of Sterling Archer get up from one of Dean’s favourite shows, Archer. He was wearing black boots too, not clunky boots though. His clothes made it very clear that Cas usually depend on stealth to complete his jobs. He had a weapons belt that was one of the most impressive things Dean had ever seen. It had room for several guns, as well as knifes, and that blade Dean had seen before. There was even knock out gas, and… what the fuck… there was even a fucking cyanide pill.  
“Cas, why the fuck do you need a cyanide pill?” Dean asked in awe.  
Cas looked momentarily confused and then he looked down at his belt and realised. “Oh, this belt was my brothers.” He said, “I just haven't really changed the stuff it had in it.”  
Sam looked at Cas with a judgemental expression, clearly wondering what cause the smaller man’s brother would have with a cyanide pill either. Dean would explain it soon or later, but for now he just ignored the younger Winchester and asked Cas another question.  
“Which brother?” he asked quietly.  
Dean noticed that Cas’ hand’s fell to the belt itself as he replied. “Balthazar.” he said, “I told you that Lucifer turned him against me.” Dean nodded, “well he became convinced that I would find out and torture him for information, so he carried that pill with him whenever he came to see me.”  
Dean’s heart broke. And he began thinking, once again, that there was no way Cas had ever been shown enough love in his life. He gave a quick, sympathetic squeeze of Castiel’s hand and then they returned back to getting ready. 

It was about 11:00 at night when they pulled up at Crowley’s compound.  
Cas turned to Sam, “You know what you have to do?”  
Sam nodded, “get into Crowley’s office and find anything that links us to him, get back out here and meet you guys in the car.”  
“And…” Castiel prompted.  
“Avoid running into anyone if possible.”  
“What about timing?” Cas continued.  
“Try and be done by 12:00, we’re leaving at 12:30.”  
Cas nodded, evidently happy with Sam’s answers. Sam still didn’t like the guy, but even he had to admit they probably wouldn’t have been able to pull this off without him. He thought of things that Sam knew he and Dean never would have. Hell, there was no way they would have thought about the police investigation that would be launched after the take down of an entire gang. And then they would have been screwed. Although Sam wasn’t going to pretend that he wasn’t glad that he didn't really have to work directly with the assassin. Dean trusted Castiel to have his back, but Sam wasn’t quiet ready to go that far.  
Now it was Dean’s turn to talk. “Be careful Sammy.” Sam knew what that meant. He knew Dean didn’t like Sam going off on his own. Dean’s whole life had been about protecting Sam. He had carried Sam out of their burning house when he was 6 months old, and he knew Dean was a little anxious about not being able to watch over him tonight. But Sam was glad Dean was letting him go, trusting his abilities enough to let him do this on his own.  
Sam smiled at his brother and then got out of the car. He headed into the compound, leaving his brother and the assassin in the car alone.  
They had a plan to get Sam in. Crowley wouldn’t be in the office this late, if he was in the compound at all. He would probably be in the den. Thats what Sam and Dean called it. It was the lions den to them, Really though, it was actually just Crowley’s room. There was a bed in there, and a television, and most importantly it was where Crowley’s liquor cabinet was, which was why Sam was pretty sure he would be there rather than the office.  
He waited for a few minutes for Dean and his lover. They were going to help him get through the initial security. When they got out of the car, Sam noticed they both looked a little shaken up, Dean even looked a little teary eyed. But Sam brushed it off for now, they had more important things to worry about. When Sam looked back at Cas, the timid man that had emerged from the car was gone, replaced instead by the fearless, worrier angel he was named after. The Cas that his brother loved was gone and in his place was Castiel. Sam would never admit it buy the guy frightened him more than just a little bit.  
The moved so that the front door was in view, there were two guards standing there. They had to make this shot from a fair way out, so it was a collective decision that Cas do it. Cas knelt down, took aim and not 30 seconds later, both men had dropped dead. Sam found it all kinda of surreal, that two lives had just been taken before his eyes. Those men had families and friends, they had acquaintances. Had. Not anymore. Cas had just taken that anyway. And surprisingly, Sam really wasn’t bothered by that. And Cas clearly wasn’t bothered either. He simply stood up and walked to the house. Gesturing for the Winchester’s to follow him.  
Sam was starting to get a bit nervous now. Soon he would be on his own, fending for himself against anyone could some at him. He watched Cas disable the security system. He did it in a matter of minutes when Sam knew it was a pretty good system, only the best for Crowley, right? Dean picked the locks, just like their dad and taught them to, and then they were in. Now it was time for them to split up. The den and the office were in different directions so with a nod to his brother, in which he tried to include so many messages, and then he went on his way.  
He withdrew his gun, just in case. He rounded every corner slowly to make sure he didn’t run into anyone and eventually he reached the office without meeting anyone he didn’t want to.  
He and Dean had been in here a few times. Whenever they did something that Crowley didn’t like he would bring them in and wave their contract around in their faces. It had happened enough times that Sam had noticed he always put it back in the third draw of the desk, so that was the draw he opened first. It was a filing cabinet. With a list of names. There were a few names that Sam recognised, and then he realised that it was Crowley’s employee files, he immediately looked at ‘W’.  
There were three files under ‘Winchester’. One for Dean, one for Sam, and one for John. He took all three just to be safe. He quickly flipped through them all, checked to see if there might be anything else he would have to look for. There were copies of the contract in both Sam and Deans, and there was even a contract in Johns. It wasn’t the same one but Sam didn’t know what it was for, he made a mental note to read it later.  
The thing that surprised him the most was that Crowley had photos of them. All off them. In John’s file there were photos of Sam and Dean as kids, there were even photos of Mary. Sam thought that perhaps their dad was more involved with Crowley than merely a long standing drug debt.  
Sam and Dean’s files contained photos too, photos of everyone they cared about. There were photos go Sam’s girlfriend Jess, Dean’s ex-girlfriend Lisa, Charlie, Jo, Ellen, Bobby, Dean’s best friend Benny, and the most recent edition to Deans, made only a few days ago, was Castiel.  
Shit. Did Crowley know who Cas was? Or did he think Cas was just another one of Dean’s conquests? Crowley was a smart guy, it wouldn’t be too hard for him to figure out that Cas was the assassin he hired. It was just a question if he thought Cas was spending time with Dean to get close to Sam, or if he saw that it was really more than that. Sam got the feeling that Crowley wasn’t naive enough to believe the former and the feeling in his gut told him that Cas, and more importantly Dean, were in trouble.  
He knew the plan was for him to go straight to the impala when he found the stuff, but he needed to find his brother. 

…

 

It was 11:00 at night when Dean parked the impala in front of Crowley’s compound. He wasn’t too nervous. Not for himself anyway, he had Cas to back him up. He was, however, worried for Sam. Sam had never had to do a job alone. Dean didn’t doubt his brothers skills but he was still nervous. He listened as Cas went through the details of the plan with Sam. When Cas was convinced Sam knew what he was doing, the younger Winchester stepped out of the car. Dean took this chance to turn to his lover, he didn’t really want to have a ‘just in case’ speech. But, well, just in case.  
“Look Cas…” he began. But he just couldn't finish, he didn’t want to think about losing Cas and the words just wouldn’t come out of his mouth.  
Cas seemed to understand. He held Dean’s hand as he whispered, “I know Dean. I know.”  
They were silent for a moment. “Cas, I need you to know…” Dean started, “I lo…”  
Cas interrupted him “Dean, you can tell me that when this is all over.”  
Dean’s breath hitched and he fought back tears. He needed Cas to know how he felt. “Cas please. Hear me out…”  
“Dean.” Cas insisted. “When this is done you can say those words, and I can say them back.”  
And then Dean understood. Cas was making him a promise. A promise that they would still get the chance to say what they needed to when this was over. A promise that they would survive this and then never let go of each other. Dean liked that promise.  
So he made it too. “Okay Cas.” he said.  
They got out of the Impala and made their way to the house. Cas picked off the guards in a matter of moments. Dean still couldn’t helped but be awed by Castiel’s skill. The years and years of training was evident and the more Dean saw of Castiel in this situation the more he understood why he had chosen this has a career after the death of his family. It was what he was good at.  
Very good at. Dean thought as we watched Cas dismantle what would be one of the best security systems available. Making it so all they had to do to get in, was pick the lock. Something Dean had been skilled in ever since he was a kids and their dad had taught them. Actually, a habit he’d gotten into as a teenager was carrying a lock pick around with him on his person. He still took it with him almost everywhere he went.  
They were in. And it was time for him to say goodbye to his brother. They didn’t speak in words, it was too risky, but Dean found that they didn’t have to. He knew what he brother was trying to say and he said it right back. And then he went off with Cas.  
Dean knew that their real objective was to get to the den and gank Crowley, but first they thought it would be best to take out all his guards, that way, if he kicked up a fight there wouldn’t be anyone to come in as his back up.  
The first place they went was the living room. It was this huge room that was actually more of a functions room and anything else, Crowley used it when he was having large amounts of people over, or if there were ever any special guests. Dean had been here enough times to know it were where Crowley’s live-in employees hung out when they weren’t doing something for their boss.  
They rounded the corner and entered the room. They each took one side each. Dean had 3 men on his side. He didn’t look over at Cas, he wanted to, but he also knew that in situations like these every moment counted and he didn’t have time to waste, not even a second. So he took aim and fired. His aim wasn’t as good as Castiel’s and he had to use 4 shots to take down the 3 men but he got the job done. Then he looked over at Cas. It appeared that there had been 5 men on Castiel side. And of course, in true assassin form, he had taken them down in 5 shots.  
Dean looked around at the 8 bodies lying on the ground. There was blood everything. Dean left a little nauseous know that he was the one who put it there. Cas seemed to understand exactly what Dean was thinking. He put his hand on Dean’s shoulder and gave him a reassuring squeeze. It wasn’t much, but since neither of them were willing to speak just yet, it would have to do. It did make Dean feel a little better anyway.  
They waited a few moments before moving on, they wanted to wait and make sure that no one had been attracted to that room by any sort of noise they had made. There hadn’t been much commotion, the men were dead before they even had any idea what was going on. Dean felt a little sorry for them, they never stood a chance. Not against him, and especially not against Cas.  
Then they were off again, slowly moving through the house, getting closer and clause to their target.  
Cas took out another two men on their way. Dean couldn’t get over his efficiency, he had taken those two men out before Dean had even realised what was going on, let alone had time to lift his gun. Once again, Dean was reminded why they had needed Cas on this mission.  
Finally they were there. There weren't any guards out the front of the den. But it was the room right in the centre of the compound and it was unlikely that they ever considered someone actually making it that far. Of course they didn’t count on the Winchesters.  
Cas made a gesture to the door, signalling that he was ready to go in, but Dean had another idea. He pulled the other man closer to him and whispered in his ear. “Cas, there’s another entrance around the other side, we’d have more options if one of us went around there.”  
Cas looked impressed and nodded. “Give me a minute to get there and then we’ll go in. Be ready to enter in exactly one minute.”  
Dean didn’t like splitting up with Cas, but it was definitely the best option. Not many people knew about the other entrance to Crowley’s room, but Dean did. Crowley often got Dean to sneak things in and out of there for him. Most of the time the thing he was smuggling was a women, a prostitute of some sort. That only made him hate Crowley more.  
It had been a minute. It was time to go in. Not for the first time, Dean was glad that he had Cas to back him up. His nerves were starting to get the best of him. Crowley was a powerful man. If he got away none of the three men would ever be safe again. More so Sam and Dean, but even Cas would be in trouble if this didn’t work. Suddenly he was hit with the real weight of the whole situation and wasn’t so confident anymore. But it was too late to back down now. So he opened to door and went it, gun at the ready.  
But nothing could have prepared him for what he found.  
Crowley was standing in the centre of the room, looking directly at the door Dean was entering through, as if he was expecting him. He had this evil glint in his eyes and Dean’s heart stopped when he realise why.  
Fuck.  
Sam was supposed to be out of here by now. Or at least still in the office on the other side of the compound.  
There was clear evidence of a struggle. Both Sam and Crowley were a little bruised, Crowley had a cut on his cheek, clear evidence of his brothers right hook, and Sam was supporting a split lip and what would eventually turn into a black eye. It was clear that Sam had lost though.  
Dean’s heart dropped to his stomach when he saw Sam’s weapon on the ground a few metres from them all.  
Dean noticed that Cas wasn’t there yet, he hoped the assassin hadn’t gotten sidetracked by anything, evidently he could really really use that back up. He wasn’t real sure what to do, but he opted to raise him gun once again, aiming it at Crowley.  
Crowley just smirked at that. He gave Sam a little push and the younger Winchester fell to him knees before the infamous crime syndicate. Dean thought he stopped breathing altogether when he saw Crowley pointing a gun directing at his little brothers head.  
Fuck.


	12. The End, for some.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was because of this chapter that I tagged put the violence warning. Honestly, I'm not really sure what constitutes as "Graphic Depictions of Violence." But I figured I'd tag it just to be safe.

Dean was frozen where he stood. He was scared. He was fucking terrified. But he also knew that Sam’s life was on the line, so he swallowed his nerves and he spoke with a smirk.  
“You’re not gonna start monologuing are you, Crowley?”  
Crowley laughed at that. It was a sick, maniacal laugh and it made Dean want to shrivel up in revulsion. God he hated this man. More now than ever before as he was about to be the reason his brother lived or died.  
“You always find the humour in everything don’t you Dean.” he said with a smile. Then he looked down at Sam. “Apparently when you want something done, you have to do it yourself.” He did not sound happy. “I never did like getting my hands dirty, but your bother seems to be the exception.  
Sam wasn’t an idiot. The first thing he notched when Dean walked into the room was that Cas wasn’t with him. And if Cas wasn’t standing right next to Dean then Sam knew it was because Dean had told him about the other way into the room, now they just had to keep Crowley busy and unsuspecting until Cas arrived. Sam didn’t like relying on the assassin like that, he didn’t trust Cas to save his life, but he did trust him to save Dean’s. So they would just have to bind their time.  
“We know about the assassin you know.” Sam said suddenly. Dean’s eyes widened, obviously willing his brother not to give anything away.  
Crowley look down at him. “Oh do you now?” he asked.  
“Yes.” Sam replied instantly. “Dean overheard you ordering the hit…” Crowley raised an eyebrow at that, Dean just shrugged. “…Wasn’t hard to figure out who it was when the eye randomly implemented himself into our lives the next day.”  
Crowley huffed a laugh. “Yes I suppose that is true. I’m surprised The Angel has been able to remain faceless for so long, it was rather easy to identify him.” Dean looked shocked, but Crowley’s words only confirmed Sam’s initial suspicions. Crowley knew who Cas was.  
“Well, Dean managed to somehow get him to trust us. And he was living with Dean for the last few days so it wasn’t hard for us to tell when he planed to make his move.” Sam paused for dramatic effect, he just couldn’t help himself. “I think it’s fair to say he didn’t suspect the sleeping pills Dean put in his dinner tonight.”  
Now it was Crowley’s turn to look surprised. “The man is a very good, highly trained assassin. For the price he costs, I would think he would be better than to fall for that.”  
Dean had caught up with Sam’s story and was more than happy to go along with it. “Well, like Sam said, he was living with me. He had no reason to suspect that I knew who he really was, and no reason to think I would try and drug him.”  
Crowley looked mildly impressed, but also rather angry. “Don’t worry though,” Sam said, “by the time he wakes up. We’ll be gone and you'll be dead.”  
Crowley through his head back and laughed at that. “Really Moose?” he said. “Because from where I’m standing that doesn’t appear to be the case.”  
And that was when Dean noticed it. Cas was there, standing behind Crowley. He’d clearly run into someone on his way there, he was covered in blood and he had a few scratches here and there. Dean also noticed that his knuckles were pretty bruised. But Dean felt better now, he knew all he had to do was keep Crowley distracted long enough for Cas to aim and fire.  
“Well, we Winchesters have a habit of surprising.” he said.  
Crowley didn’t like that. He grabbed Sam and hauled him to his feet, so he was standing and their bodies were now much closer. Dean watched as Cas clenched him jaw in anger as he lost his perfect shot. There was now no way he could get a kill shot without fatally wounding Sam. 

 

…

 

Cas was glad Dean had told him about the other entrance, it would give them yet another advantage. He felt the night was so far a success. It made him a little nervous if he was being honest. In his experience, jobs like this rarely went so smoothly.  
Apparently he spoke to soon though, because it seemed that Crowley’s secret entrance was guarded. There were three men, all dressed him suits, standing by what Castiel fingered was the entrance. It was almost as though they were waiting for him, and if he hadn’t been preoccupied, that would have made his rather suspicious. They attacked him as soon as he rounded the corner, he didn’t even have the time to aim him gun before it was knocked out of his hand by one man and he was knocked on his ass by another.  
He was highly trained and these men really weren’t. However they had surprised him, they hadn’t encountered much difficultly so far and Cas had not been expecting this sudden attack. And yet, it was very much happening. Cas felt blood drip out of his nose as the tallest of the three men connected his fist with the assassins face. The guy was holding onto Castiel collar as he continued the onslaught of punched. Cast used this to his advantage, he grabbed the man’s wrist and pushed up with his whole body weight. Apparently it was now his opponents turn to be surprised and Cas rolled them over so that he was not straddling the mobster. By the time the other two men realised what was happening their friend was unconscious. Cas didn’t like fist fights. Not because he wasn’t skilled in that area of combat, he most certainly was. He just preferred knife fighting. That was were be was most trained. So as soon as he stood up, with his hands free, he pulled his blade out of the belt that hung low on his hips. The men smirked, as though they didn’t think Cas really had any chance of overcoming the two of them. Cas always liked it when his opponents were cocky, it made it much more fun to put them on their back.  
They ran at him, and their first mistake was that they didn’t draw a weapon. Their second mistake was that they attacked him simultaneously. One wouldn’t think this made much of a difference or if anything it was a disadvantage for the hit man, but Cas knew that it made it much easier for him.  
As they ran Cas was able to take a quick step forward and plunge his blade into the man coming from his left. Apparently they had underestimated Castiel’s abilities because the other mans eyes widened in genuine shock, as though it surprised him that Castiel had been able to end the fight that quickly. But Cas knew it wasn’t quick enough. It had been well over one minute and he knew that Dean would have already entered into Crowley’s room by now. The thought of Dean being there with no back up made him anxious. He was more than ready to end this pointless sparing match with men who were evidently vastly inferior.  
His opponent obviously didn’t like what he had just witnessed the assassin do. He pulled out a gun. Castiel rolled his eyes. Men seemed to think they were invincible when they held a gun in their hand. Castiel had met so many men whose guts lied only in their trigger finger.  
Castiel was better than that though. He didn’t need a gun or bullets to take someone down. In fact, he preferred not to. He found it to be almost a waste of his skills.  
The guy aimed and fired. Apparently he was also a very bad shot. Or maybe it was just that his hands were shaking with fear. Cas thought that would be a viable excuse. He reached back into his belt. The man fired again. And again, he missed. Castiel pulled out a knife. It was one of his favourites, it had been especially designed as a throwing knife.  
While he had been acquiring this knew weapon, the other man had been taking a very careful aim. Obviously determined not to miss this time. Castiel knew that from the man’s steady breathing and controlled movements that he was going to hit his target this time. So Castiel acted fast. He threw the knife and it landed in the other man’s chest, not quite in the centre. Just a little to the left. Right in the heart. The man dropped to the floor instantly.  
Cas was relived that was over. Now he could get back to the real task at hand. Saving Dean Winchester. His nose wasn’t bleeding anymore, but he knew that the blood would be slowly drying on his face. He ignored it. Dean was more important. He entered through the secret entrance.  
He couldn’t help but notice that there were many hidden compartments in the walls. No one would notice them if they didn’t already know where they were, but to the trained eye of an assassin, they were relatively easy to stop. If Cas hadn’t been under a very specific time restraint, then he would have snooped. Perhaps seem if there was anything he could have taken. But Dean was his priority right no.  
He entered the room and the first things he saw was the back of a man who he assumed was Crowley, and Dean facing this very man. Dean’s demeanour was calm and yet Cas could see the panic he was trying to hide. Why was he panicking? Surely Dean could take anything that Crowley dished out? The man was small and not exactly intimidating.  
But then he heard a voice that did not belong to either of these men. He recognised the voice but it took him a moment to make the connection. It was Sam. Sam was here. That was why Dean was panicking. It was then that Castiel saw him. Kneeling on the ground, with Crowley pointing a gun at his head.  
Well, Shit.  
This complicated thing a little bit. But Cas still lifted his weapon and took his aim. He had a clear kill shot on the mob boss.  
He heard Sam talking about how they had drugged Cas. He smiled a little bit, he knew he liked Sam. The kid was smart. Very smart. And Cas was very glad that Crowley had no knowledge of his true whereabouts.  
Dean was saying something now. Cas noticed that the oldest Winchester was now looking at him and Castiel’s heart warmed a little at how the fear and panic was no longer evident in Dean’s expression. “Well, we Winchesters have a habit of surprising.” he heard Dean say.  
Crowley growled at that, angrily hauling Sam up to his feet. The younger Winchester was now standing in line with the British man.  
Cas balled his fist up in anger. He no longer had the kill shot. There was no way to exterminate Crowley without murdering Sam.  
The panic had returned to Dean’s eyes and Castiel thought that was perfectly understandable. There was really only one option left in all of this. The only free shot he had was to the mob bosses shoulder. It wasn’t much, but it would most likely get him to let go of Sam, so the taller man could get out of the way before Castiel delivered the final kill shot.  
Cas didn't really like this option. It was too slow. They needed immediate action and they just didn’t have the time to waste right now.  
Cas aimed his gun at Crowley’s shoulder and prayed to God that Sam could run fast.  
He fired.  
Crowley Screamed.  
The bullet ripped through Crowley’s shoulder and the hand that had been holding Sam in place reached up to clasp over the fresh, gaping bullet wound.  
Sam seemed to understand what was going on. As did Dean. Dean started moving towards his brother as his brother moved quickly away from Crowley.  
Cas aimed again. This time at the back of the criminals head. It took him a few moments as the man was moving a lot as he whined in pain.  
Apparently those few moments were too long. Cas waited too long. In the time it took for the assassin to steady his aim Crowley had already lived his own weapon, aiming it at the tall man running in the direction away from him.  
He fired. Castiel fired.  
The two gunshots echoed in the room and was one caused Crowley’s brain to plaster the bedroom floor, the other hit Sam Winchester in the back.  
Castiel’s eyes widened in horror and he heard Dean scream out his brothers name as Sam hit the ground with a thud.  
Both Castiel and Dean ran to the aid of the youngest Winchester. Cas knew a lot about first aid, it had been a large part of his training. If Sam had been hit in the arm or the leg, then Cas would have easily been able to remove the bullet and stitch him back up. But Sam wasn’t hit the arm or the leg. He had been hit in the back. Castiel knew that they would be very lucky if it didn’t hit any of Sam’s vital organs, and they would be even luckier if his spinal cord was undamaged. But the likeliness of being that lucky was very, very slim.  
They had no option but to get Sam to a hospital immediately.  
Dean was already kneeling next to his brothers body, his hands already covered in blood as he tried to keep Sam awake.  
“Dean, can you carry him?” Cas asked. “We need to get him to a hospital.”  
Dean nodded. He didn’t speak. Castiel doubted he could. But he did was he was hold and he gentle picked his brother up. It was a little bit awkward since Sam was so much bigger than Dean, but Dean made it work knowing it was the only option.  
They made it back to the impala very quickly, but they were running out of time. Dean loaded Sam into the backseat and then joined him. He started to apply pressure to the wound as Castiel got in the drivers seat of the car and started driving them to the hospital.  
With his knowledge of first aid Cas knew that Sam needed the doctors to he ready for him. He got out his phone and dialled the number for the hospital as he got Dean to recite it for him.  
“My friend has been shot in the back.” He said calmly and yet still with a clear note or urgency. “I’m driving him to you at this moment, I need you to be prepared when he arrive.”  
He was clearly speaking to a nurse because the moment he mentioned a patient, she was straight down to business.  
“Can you tell me where he was shot, sir?” She asked.  
“In his back.” Cas replied immediately.  
“Is he still conscious?”  
Cas honestly didn’t know. He called out to Dean. “Dean, is he still awake?”  
“Just…” Came the shaky reply. He sympathised, he knew what it was like to watch a sibling die. Unfortunately though, he didn’t have the luxury of time to put into calming his lover. So he simply relayed Deans response to the nurse.  
He told her that they were about 5 minutes away and then he passed the phone over to Dean, so that she could give him specific instruction as to what would best help his brother until he arrived at the hospital.  
Castiel knew it was just going to be a matter of whether or not they got Sam to the hospital in time. There was a high chance that he wasn’t going to make it even to the hospital and there was an even higher chance that he would die on the operating table or in his hospital bed afterwards. Castiel prayed not.  
He felt guilty. He should have taken the shot at Crowley as soon as he had entered the room, then perhaps this could have all avoided.  
He was jolted out of his self-deprecative thoughts as he heard Sam moan in pain. His heart clenched at the sound. His chest ached even more at the sound that followed, the sound of Dean’s shaky voice begging his brother to hold on, to just push a little bit more, reassuring him that they were almost there.  
As Dean spoke these words the hospital came into view. It wasn’t much later that they pulled into the car park. Dean lifted his brother up and practically ran through the ER doors. Sam was loosing consciousness now and Cas knew he wouldn’t be able to hold on much longer. There was so much blood. It was just everywhere. And Sam looked as pale as a ghost. There was a nurse - presumably the one they were speaking to on the phone, he saw them and immediately gestured for Dean to place his brother down on a stretcher. Doctors and nurses alike started pushing Sam towards the operation room. Cas was glad he had called ahead, evidently they had prepared for this after he had called, and that meant that unavailable time wasn’t being wasted.  
The nurse put her hand out to block Dean as he tried to follow after Sam.  
“Sir, he is going into surgery, you can’t go in there with him.” she said sympathetically.  
Dean honestly looked like he was about to lose it, Cas could tell he was struggling not to cry. Cas came up to his lover and softly placed a hand on his shoulder.  
“Why don’t we go get cleaned up and then we can wait around until Sam gets out of surgery?” Castiel suggested.  
Dean nodded blankly, as if he had only just remembered that Cas was with him. The nurse gave him a grateful look, she had obviously expecting Dean to kick up a fuss, she directed them to showers that they could use and offered them some clothes that weren’t covered in blood.  
One they got to the bathroom Castiel realised that the only way he was going to get Dean cleaned up, was if he did it himself. Dean was gone. He was shaking and staring at nothing. Cas knew he was probably just in shock still. It was traumatic event to hold the life of someone in your very arms. Especially if that person was your own little brother.  
So Cas stripped them both down and they shared a shower. There was not sexual connotation about it, it was purely for convenience. It took him about 15 minutes got get all the blood off Dean and in all that time Dean did not speak one word, or even look his lover directly in the eye. Cas dried and dressed them both and it was only then that Dean respond to the smaller man.  
“Cas…” he whispered and he pulled his lover into a tight hug. Cas wrapped his arms around the green eyed man as Dean buried with face in the crook of Castiel’s neck. He heard Dean whimper, and although he knew that Dean would never admit it, he realised that the older Winchester was crying.  
“It’s okay Dean…” he whispered. “He’ll be okay.”  
And God, Castiel hoped he was right.


	13. The aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam's in the hospital and Dean, unsurprisingly, blames himself.

Tomorrow it will have been exactly one month since Sam was shot, and in that time Dean had discovered something that he had never wanted to. He had found out what it was like to live without his little brother. And he didn’t like it. He hated it. It was never something he wanted. And that was why Dean found himself, once again, at Sam’s bedside, pleading for him to wake up.  
He thought back to that first day, how he and Cas had stayed at the hospital for almost 10 hours before one of the nurses had come out and told him they had managed to extract the bullet, but that Sam was in the Intensive Care Unit. The nurse had used a lot of big medical words that Dean wasn’t really in the headspace to understand, but Cas had listened intently and later repeated it to Dean.  
Sam was in a coma. Apparently the bullet didn’t damage his spinal column so at least they wouldn’t have to worry about paralysis if —when— he woke up.  
The nurse said that their biggest concern was that Sam had lost a lot of blood, and they weren’t sure if his body could recover from that. Dean didn’t need to be told that Sam had lost a lot blood, he knew. It had been on his hands.  
They told Dean that only time would tell if Sam was going to be okay. Dean didn’t like that, he thought that it wasn’t a matter of if, but rather when. He knew that Sam would pull through. He had to, Dean needed him, so he would make it. But until then, Dean visited every single day, doing everything he possibly could to help his brother.  
So everyday, Dean went to work. He found himself dreading that more than anything, he hated the looks of pity he got from he co-workers and his friends. But more than anything he hated the disappointment he could see on Bobby’s face every time their eyes met. He’d had to tell Bobby about the contract with Crowley after the news that Sam had been shot eventually got out. Needless to say, Bobby was not happy. He had cursed John Winchester a thousand times over and told Dean he was an idgit for letting his father have such an impact on his life even 7 years after his death. But after he calmed down he remembered that Sam was in hospital and the last thing Dean needed was to be lectured about his life choices. Dean avoided telling him the truth about Cas because he knew Bobby wouldn’t just let that one go. So even though Bobby had sighed and said there was no point getting upset about it all now, Dean still felt like he had disappointed his surrogate father, and rightfully so. No matter what Bobby or Cas told him, he knew that it was his fault that Sam was in this situation and he hated himself for that.  
After work, Dean always went to visit Sam. He couldn’t do it before work because it just put him in an awful mood. And he would spend maybe an hour or two there and then he would go home. And what was waiting for his there was really the only good thing about his life at the moment. Cas had stayed. Dean was never more grateful for anything in the world, he was finding it hard enough without Sam and if Cas had left him too Dean didn’t think he would be able to get through this.  
Everyday he would come home from seeing Sam and he would be all sad and mopey, and he would smile when he realised that Cas had made him dinner. The former assassin would hug him tight and they would eat and spend the night together in peace. Cas was really the only one who could make him feel better given the situation, and everyday that he spent with the man made him fall in love even more.  
Today was no different. He had left work early because he’d snapped at a few of his friends, he was a little on edge because the night before, the Police had come around to his apartment. Apparently they had noticed that Sam was shot on the same night that Crowley and his gang were killed, they wanted to know if there was any relevance to the two crimes.  
Fortunately, before he had been shot, Sam had managed to successfully sneak out the files. The police seemed to have no clue to the Winchesters affiliation with the crime boss. Dean was glad for that.  
They told the police that it had just happened when they were walking home from a diner after having dinner together, that it was a sort of drive by but they weren’t sure if it was necessarily meant for Sam. Dean thought it was a pretty lousy cover story, but the cops believed it. Probably because Cas was the most skilled liar Dean had ever seen, and he had grown up around con artists.  
So after that, Dean had been feeling tense all day, like the cops might be watching him. He knew they probably weren’t but he still felt it. He was sitting with Sam in the hospital. The nurses had said it was okay to talk to him, in fact they said he definitely should for both their benefits.  
“Hey Sammy.” he whispered “How are you?” and then he gave a small, sad laugh. “Sorry, stupid question.”  
He sighed and waited a moment, kind of hoping that his brother would say something back. “I still don’t think Bobby’s happy with me. But he’s trying not to show it, and I don’t like that. I feel like the only person who is ever honest with me is Cas.”  
“I still haven’t told Cas that I love him.” He told his little brother. “I tried to before we went into Crowley’s place, but he wouldn’t let me, and then I was planning on doing it after we finished all that and then… well… you know what happened then.”  
“I’m a little worried he’s going to leave if I don’t say it soon. Not that you would really care about that, you don’t even like him. I think you will after you wake up and realise everything he's been doing for us this last month. Did you know he's paying your hospital bills?” he asked.  
He paused, but then when no reply came he continued talking. “Yeah, when I first got the bill I went straight to Bobby and asked for more hours, but even working 24/7 at the garage wouldn’t have gotten me the money I needed. Cas offered to pay. I said no at first, because I’m your brother and it should be my responsibility to take care of you, you know? But Cas said that was ridiculous and that he wanted to help. Apparently being an assassin pays well.” he said with a laugh.  
Dean was getting a little emotional now, he could feel the tears building up. He was so fucking sick of crying all the time. And that last part really hit home. It was Dean job to protect his little brother and he hated himself for how badly he failed at that.  
“He has a cabin up in Alaska, you know. I’ll take you up there w-when you’re feeling better…” Dean’s voice cracked a little bit at that last part. “We’ve never been to Alaska before, all the places dad dragged us to, and we’ve never been to Alaska.” Dean gave a watery smile.  
Dean kind of wanted to reach out and grab him brothers hand, but he knew he would loose it if he did that. He was silent for a moment and then he continued talking.  
“Do you remember when we were kids, and dad left us in, I think it was New Jersey, honestly I can’t remember. But you were only about 10 and you found this dog in the street and you insisted that we keep him. I remember you named him Bones and you almost started crying when I told you there was no way the motel would let you keep a dog.”  
“And I swear your puppy dog eyes were better than the actual dogs because I remember sneaking Bones into the motel and he stayed with us for almost a month.” He smiled as a tear dripped down his face.  
“I actually grew to really love that dog. I was just as upset as you when Dad made us send him away. But if you can hear me now I’m going to deny ever saying that when you wake up.”  
Dean hated the hospital. He hated the way it smelled like disinfectant and he hated listening to the sound of weeping loved ones. Especially when he was one of those people crying. He was wiping away a tear when the nurse walked in. Her name was Amelia, Dean had spoken to her quite a bit on his visits since she was always the one who had to come in and tell him that visiting hours were over. She was a nice girl, he liked her. He got the impression that Sam would really like her too.  
“Hello, Mr. Winchester.” She said with a sympathetic smile.  
“How many time do I have to ask you to call me Dean.” he replied, plastering on his best fake smile. She saw right through it of course.  
“At least once more, Mr. Winchester.” She teased.  
Dean laughed. He really did like her. “How is he today?” he asked the nurse, now in a serious tone.  
She did her quick daily check before replying. “No change. I’m sorry Dean.”  
Dean signed and just when he thought he had managed to hold back the tears, his body proved that wrong. “It’s been a whole month.” He whispered. “I just don’t know what to do.”  
Amelia placed what was meant to be a comforting hand on his shoulder. Dean found it made him feel weak more than anything else. “You know you just have to wait Dean.”  
Dean’s face fell to his hands. “I know.” He said. He hated this. This waiting game. Dean had always been a fast acting man and patience was not one of his virtues. He needed to know his brother was okay, and he needed to know it now. He sighed. “I’m gonna head home, nice to see you again Amelia.”  
She smiled up at him “I’ll see you tomorrow Dean.”  
Yeah you will, and every other day until he wakes up. Dean thought grimly. He’d had enough for one day. All he wanted now was to get home and curl up next to Castiel. He got in that Impala and he fought back tears the whole way home. He hated seeing his brother like that. He was so pale and ghostly. He looked as though the life was being drained from him and it scared the shit out of Dean.  
He didn’t want to think about it really, but he knew that there was a very real chance he could loose Sam from this. God, he had never been more glad that a man was dead, never been more happy that Crowley was rotting in the ground. Dean thought he was getting off way to easy for being responsible for doing this to Sam. If he were alive, Dean would have killed him by now.  
Dean opened his front door and was immediately hit by the smell of the dinner Cas had cooked for them. God Dean loved this. It had only been a month since he met Cas but he knew that this was what he wanted forever, coming home to Cas. Home cooked meal or not, all he needed was Cas. And preferably Sam. And with that thought his smile was gone and was his slightly improved mood.  
“Dean? It that you?” Cas called out from the kitchen.  
“Yeah it’s me.” He replied, hoping Cas didn’t notice the crack in his voice.  
“Come get dinner.” His lover called.  
Dean hung up his jacket and kicked off his shoes. “You don’t have to cook every night Cas.” He said as he walked into the kitchen.  
Cas laughed. “What else am I going to do all day?” he asked. And then he turned around to look at the taller man.  
“Oh Dean.”  
And Dean realised his eyes must be red and puffy from his visit to the hospital.  
Dean went to reply but his words got all chocked up in his throat and it came out as more of a sob. Cas came around and pulled him into a hug. Dean held on tightly, as if he thought someone would tear Cas away from him as well.  
“It’s all my fault, Cas.” He sobbed.  
Cas pulled back a bit and replied sternly. “Don’t think that Dean. Sam was standing up for himself, his own life. He made that choice and it’s not on you.”  
“I don’t know what I’ll do with myself if he dies” he said quietly, not replying to Castiel’s comment, because he really didn’t believe it.  
“He’s not going to die Dean.” Cas’ voice softened.  
“He’s not getting better Cas.” He murmured into the smaller mans neck. “I thought there would be by now but there’s still no change.”  
Cas ran his fingers through Deans hair soothingly. “Dean, he’ll get better, I promise.”  
“How do you know?” Dean was just being stubborn now, but he needed the reassurance.  
“Because you and I are never going to give up and if it takes 5, or even 10 years—“ Dean let out another choked sound at the idea of it taking that long “—I’m not going to stop paying for his treatment until he gets better, so I can promise that he will.”  
Dean squeezed him even tighter at that. God he loved this man. How did he get this lucky?  
“How come you're so perfect?” he mumbled quietly.  
Cas laughed and grabbed Dean’s hand. “Lets go sit down.” He handed Dean his food and let them both to the couch, not letting go of Dean’s fingers. They eat in a comfortable silence. Usually they had the television running in the background, but tonight they both felt this was more fitting to their somber mood. They finished their meal and then they just sat in each others embrace for a moment before Cas spoke.  
“I got a call today…” he said hesitantly.  
“From who?” Dean was a little worried at Castiel tone.  
“Just an old associate of mine.” Cas paused, and then continued, “I promised him a favour in return for making yours and Sam’s fake passports his top priority. He wanted to call in that favour.”  
Dean tensed, that didn’t sound good. “What does that mean?” he asked quietly, praying that Cas wouldn't have to leave him.  
“Well, he wanted me to leave for Russia tonight and kill some political opponent of his employer.” Cas said. Honestly, Dean could never get over how casually Cas said that.  
Dean didn’t respond for a moment. He didn’t want Cas to leave but he also knew that a large amount of Castiel’s life depended on honour, so if he had promised this guy something he should really be doing it, even if Cas considered himself to be out of that life… he should still do it.  
“Are you going to?” Dean finally asked.  
Cas just gave him a look. “Do you really think I would leave you right now?” he asked bewildered.  
“No…” Dean stammered, not wanting to upset his lover. “… But you did make a promise…” he trailed off.  
Cas’ face softened a bit. “Yes, I did. But I told him that he would have to call it in some other time because my family needed me and I was staying in the US with my boyfriend for a while.” Dean’s eyes widened at that. “Needless to say, he wasn’t happy.” Cas continued, “but he seemed to understand nothing he said would change my mind, so he didn’t kick up much of a fuss.”  
Dean beamed. “You told a scary Russian mobster that I’m your boyfriend?”  
Cas rolled his eyes. “Well obviously I didn’t say you specifically, but yes.”  
Dean grinned even wider “Aww Cas, I’m touched.”  
“You know Dean, technically you are actually in a relationship with a —“ Cas made quotation marks with his fingers “—scary Russian mobster.”  
Dean face fell a little at that. It actually concerned him how often he forgot about Castiel’s past. Not that he really cared that much though.  
Cas didn’t give him a chance to reply before gesturing for Dean to stay seated while he went into the kitchen. He came out a few moments later.  
“Bobby called and told me you’d had a bad day at work.” he said as he presented Dean with a big piece of cherry pie.  
Dean’s heart fluttered, just like it did every time Cas did something special for him. He was going to have to thank Bobby tomorrow “It seems that this big, scary Russian mobster really loves me.”  
Cas huffed a laugh. “Yes, I would say he does.”  
Dean almost dropped his fork. That was not the response he had been expecting. He couldn’t say he didn’t like it and honestly, it made his heart beat faster then it ever had before. He looked over at Cas. His boyfriend looked a little bit shy, it was a strange look on a man who was once an assassin.  
“I love you Dean.” He said quietly. Dean put his pie on the table and pulled Cas into a tender kiss.  
He pulled back. “I wanted to say that first.” He said.  
Cas laughed and pulled him into another kiss. “You’ll just have to say it second.” He said teasingly.  
Dean returned his grin, “I love you.” He whispered.  
For a moment Dean felt okay. He was able to forget that his brother was in the hospital, and he focused on the man he loved in front of him. It felt amazing to finally say it, he had wanted to say it for so long that it was almost a relief to finally know that Cas knew how he felt.  
And that was how they spend the rest of their night, whispering sweet nothings all wrapped up in each others arms. Later on, when Dean had a sleeping Castiel snoring and pressed against his chest, he thought back to the events of the day.  
Tomorrow he was going to apologise to Bobby for snapping at him and when he went to see Sam after work, he would tell him about Cas’ promise to never give up.  
Dean thought back to his moments with Cas. He loved that Cas seemed to know what to do to help him before even he did. He thought it probably wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that Cas knew him better than he knew himself. Cas could make him smile, make him laugh. Through all of this, that was the thing that he was most grateful for. That Cas wasn’t letting his whole world go dark. Cas was his light, the only reason he wasn’t carrying around a literal dark rain cloud. And Dean knew that if Sam couldn’t get through this that it would brake him, but he also knew that Cas would there to pick up the pieces and fit the jagged edges back together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hands up if you got the Pirates of the Caribbean reference!! 
> 
> Clearly I watch way too much television and should really stop quoting other things in my own stuff.


	14. The awakening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam wakes up... And is a bit of an ass.

Dean woke up before his alarm went off. He thought about simply going back to sleep but when he saw Castiel lying next to him with his cheek squished like a baby and his dark hair all messy he just laughed and found himself watching his lover at peace in his sleep. Cas got nightmares a lot so Dean always liked watching him when he was finally sleeping peacefully. Dean hated when Cas had nightmares, there was nothing he could do to stop them and he just felt too helpless. But Cas insisted that simply having Dean with him was more help than he had ever had before.  
A few moments later Cas woke up. “Morning Dean.” he mumbled into the pillow.  
Dean leant down and kissed his head, “Morning Cas. Did you sleep alright?” he asked. He didn’t really need to ask, if Cas hadn’t slept well then Dean would be able to tell.  
“mmhm” Cas made a sleepy noisy of agreement, and Dean laughed at him. He wiggled himself a little close to Cas and kissed him, Cas kissed back desperately and soon they were making out like a couple of teenager. Dean silently hoped he didn’t have awful morning breathe, but Cas didn’t seem to mind.  
Dean’s alarm went off. Cas pulled away from Dean with an annoyed groan. “Dean, don’t go.” He whined. Dean knew that if he wanted to he could stay in bed for another 10 or 15 minutes and still make it to work on time but he had wanted to get there early today.  
“I’m sorry baby, I wanna get there early so I can talk to Bobby.” he said, absentmindedly running his fingers though Castiel’s hair.  
Cas knew that Dean had an argument with Bobby the day before so he didn't argue any further, he understood that this was something Dean needed to do. “Okay Dean, but I’m going back to sleep.”  
Dean laughed and got up to get ready. 10 minutes later Dean gave Cas a quick kiss and an “I love you” before slipping out of the house and heading to work.  
Just as Dean planned, Bobby was the only one at the garage when he arrived.  
“What are you doing here so early, boy?” Came Bobby’s gruff voice.  
“I wanted to talk to you…” Dean said anxiously, “…if that’s alright.” They might not have ever said it, but Dean knew Bobby loved him like a son, and Bobby knew that Dean loved him like a father, but that meant that disappointing Bobby was something that made Dean feel nauseous and unworthy. Neither of them were very good at heart to heart moments, but Dean needed to say this.  
Bobby frowned a little bit but nodded his head anyway and gestured for Dean to take a seat.  
“What’s on your mind son?” He asked.  
“I wanted to apologise…” he said, nervously twitching his hands in his lap. “…for snapping at you yesterday and, well, just being an all-round ass lately.”  
Dean was a little surprised when he heard Bobby chuckle a bit in response. “Dean, you don’t have to say sorry, everyone knows what you're going through and no one blames you for being a little short tempered.”  
Dean didn’t like that, he didn’t want anyone to make excuses for him. He knew what the reality was, he knew that he had failed as a brother and now he was failing as a son and a friend. “That doesn’t matter Bobby,” Dean insisted. “It’s not fair for me to take things out on you when what happen wasn’t your fault and…”  
“It wasn’t your fault either boy.” Bobby interrupted him.  
Dean went quiet. He didn’t know how to respond to that. He still didn’t believe it and Bobby seemed to sense that because he sighed loudly.  
“Dean, don’t worry about everyone else. Just take care of your brother, and maybe let someone take care of you a little bit.” He said softly, “Like that boyfriend of yours, what’s his name again?”  
Dean couldn’t help but smile at the mention of Cas. “His name is Castiel.”  
Bobby had met Cas once or twice in passing, but never in a proper, official way. “You still have to bring him over for dinner to meet me and Ellen.”  
Dean nodded in confirmation, and then a few of the other guys piled into the garage to start the day, and the conversation was over.  
“Thanks Bobby.” Dean said quietly before giving a quick smile and heading off to start the days work.  
The day passed slowly. Dean buried himself in his work so that he wouldn’t snap at anyone again, he didn’t want to let down anyone else. Bobby kept a close eye on him, Dean knew it was supposed to be discrete but honestly, Bobby had all the subtlety of a hand grenade. So when the work day ended, Dean was more than ready to leave and go visit his brother.  
When he arrived at the hospital, he walked straight to his brother’s room. Amelia was there checking on him. “How is he today?” he asked, yet again.  
“No change I’m afraid.” Was the reply, yet again.  
Dean smiled sweetly at the nurse and waited for her to leave so he could spend time with his brother.  
“I’m still not sure what I should be doing right now Sammy.” He said. “I talked to Bobby today and he said I should just focus on taking care of you. And that’s all I’ve ever wanted to do, all I’ve ever tried to do.”  
“You didn’t always make it easy you know, you ran away more times that I can count. But I always found you and I always made sure you were safe.”  
Dean could feel his hands shaking a little bit, like they always did when he was feeling emotional. “I didn’t do a very good job on it this time though. And now it’s really too late for me to do anything.”  
Dean didn’t really feel like staying for very long today, he just wanted to get home to Cas. “I always tried to make sure you didn’t go hungry, get you to school on time, and make sure your clothes didn’t have holes in them. I did the best I could for you Sammy, and I’m sorry that my best wasn’t enough, it wasn’t enough to keep you safe.”  
“I’m so sorry Sammy.”  
Normally he would stay longer than that. But today, he just couldn’t handle sitting there in silence as his brother didn't respond to his words. So he went home. He drove back to his apartment where the one good thing in him life was waiting for him.  
When he arrived home he smiled at the set table and the lovely meal Cas had prepared for them. He gave his boyfriend a quick kiss. “It looks good Cas, thank you.”  
Cas smiled and they both sat down. They ate their food, with their fingers entwined across the table.  
“Did you talk to Bobby?” Cas asked conversationally.  
“yeah” Dean replied, “I just apologised for my behaviour lately, everything’s alright now.”  
Cas squeezed his hand a little bit. “Good, I’m glad.” Cas looked like he wanted to say something else, but he hesitated and evidently decided against it.  
“Cas what’s wrong?”  
“Nothing Dean…” He said nervously, “I’ve just been doing some thinking, and, well I don’t want to stay in the apartment all day while you're at work. So I was thinking maybe I could go back to school and get some qualifications to get an actual job…?”  
Dean felt a little bit guilty that he hadn’t really thought of anything like that. He hadn't even considered that Cas would want to get another job, he had just been too busy worrying about his brother. “What about a police officer or something?” Dean suggested, “You already have all the skills you need, you'd just have to get into the force. It’d be much easier.”  
Cas shook his head. “I don’t really want to do anything dangerous, nothing that could take me away from you.”  
And now it was Dean’s turn to squeeze his boyfriend’s hand. He loved that Cas thought about that when pondering this, he absolutely loved the proof that Cas wanted to be with him forever. “What would you study?”  
“I’ve always wanted to be a teacher.” Cas said.  
Dean raised his eyebrow at that, “Really?” Cas nodded his affirmation. “What would you teach?”  
Cas looked thoughtful for a moment, “I was thinking I might try and be a theology professor. I already know a ridiculous amount about religion.”  
Dean thought that was a pretty logical thing to do. “One problem Cas.” Dean said, he didn’t want to crush his boyfriend’s hopes but it was a pretty important problem. “You didn’t actually go to school… You can’t go to college without going to high school.”  
“I might not have gone to an American school, but I was still highly educated. It was one of Lucifer’s requirements.”  
“Yeah I know, you're a fucking genius man. But you're going to need actual proof of that if you want to go to school.” Dean was trying very hard not to insinuate that Cas wasn’t smart because he definitely didn’t think that at all.  
“I have some people I can call to make documents that prove it.”  
Dean laughed at that. “Only you could do that Cas.” he said fondly. “Why don’t you go pick out your courses tomorrow?”  
Cas gave the biggest grin that Dean had ever seen on the smaller man. “Really?”  
“What? Did you think I was going to say you couldn’t do it?”  
Cas didn't respond to Dean’s comment because he was too busy getting out of his chair and pulling Dean into the biggest and most excited hug Dean had ever had. Dean laughed and kissed his boyfriend hard. They kiss was long, with their tongues battling for dominance. And when he was over Dean pulled back and whispered in Castiel’s ear. “You’re gonna be an amazing teacher Cas.” And Cas beamed at him. And Dean knew he would spend the rest of his life trying to recreate that beautiful smile.

………

So that was how the following two months went. Dean worked and visited Sam. Cas would sometimes come and visit with him. But Cas could only do that on days when he didn’t have any lectures.  
Cas absolutely adored his classes, everyday it warmed Dean’s heart when Cas would come home and tell Dean all the fascinating thing he had learned that day. And of course, he was doing brilliantly. The professor and very quickly realised that Cas practically already knew everything, so he was always given different task to everyone else, because the normal ones would have been far too easy. It helped that Cas was just a genius too, he picked up things very quickly. The college had told him that if he kept on this academic path he would be a qualified theology teacher by this time next year. They had even offered him a job when he finished in course because the current professor was a very old man who was planning on retiring very soon. Dean was so proud of him.  
Unfortunately though, Sam was yet to show any signs of improvement. Dean still visited every day after work, but his little brother just wasn’t getting any better and it was killing him.  
About a week ago, he had come home to Cas an absolute sobbing mess because the doctors had told him that perhaps it was time to start thinking about taking him off life support. Dean had lost it. He had actually threatened the doctor if he ever brought it up again. How could they honestly think that he would do that to his brother? How could there be people who actually did? Cas had help him for hours until he had calmed down enough to actually talk. Sam was his everything, the only person before Cas, that he had been certain he loved. And Dean had never even told him that, if he could have changed one thing about his relationship with Sam, it would be to have told him more often, or even at all, that he loved him. So Dean was going to fight until his brother woke up, if not just to get another chance to say those three little words.  
Once he calmed down he had apologised because that had been uncalled for. But he remained un-swayed. He firmly told the doctors that he was not ever going to take Sam of the life support. And had Cas backed him up, saying that he would pay for it for however long it took.  
But with every passing day, it seemed more and more likely that Sam simply wasn’t going to wake up. Once again, Dean found that Cas was the only reason he got up in the morning. Cas was the only reason he was still fighting for his family and not giving up and falling into an abyss of pity and self-loathing. He wasn’t far from it, he still thought everything that happened was one him, but Cas kept him from falling over the edge.  
It was Saturday afternoon. Dean and Cas had spent the whole morning sloppily making out and having sex in their bed, and now they were eating lunch, planning to go and visit Sam afterwards.  
Dean had a mouthful of his sandwich when his phone rang.  
It was the hospital.  
“Hello?” he answered. The hospital never called him and he found himself getting very worried, very quickly.  
“Dean? Is that you?” It was Amelia. She was crying.  
“Amelia. What’s wrong? Is he okay?” Dean was officially panicking now. Cas stood beside him with a hand on his shoulder, gently keeping him grounded.  
“Dean.” She huffed out a watery laugh. “He’s awake.”  
“He’s awake?” Dean was frozen. He was shaking with anticipation.  
“He’s been asking for you.”  
Dean let out the breath he had been holding. “He’s awake.” He whispered, more to himself than anyone else.  
The next few moments were surreal. He told Amelia that he was on his way and then him and Cas piled into the impala. Dean let Cas drive, he was far too agitated to do it himself. His heart was racing. He was finally going to see his brother after 3 months of nothing. He couldn’t even remember the colour of Sam’s irises because he’d spent the last 3 months looking at his eyelids. And more than anything he wanted to hear his brother voice after 3 months of no response.  
Dean didn’t even wait for Cas to turn off the engine before he was climbing out of the car and running directly towards Sam’s room.  
He stood in the door frame of his little brother’s hospital bed, like he had so many times before. Amelia was in there as per usual, expect this time she was laughing along with the younger Winchester. Dean had known he would like her. Dean left like crying when he saw his brother sitting up in his bed with his eyes open rather than lying down and looking deathly pale.  
Sam turned his head and looked at his older brother. A huge, wide grin broke out on his face. “Dean!”  
And Dean really did cry. “Fuck Sammy, it’s good to see you.” He started walking towards Sam but stopped before he reached him. “Can I hug him?” He asked Amelia. The young nurse smiled and nodded. Dean held on to his baby brother longer than he ever had before, almost as though he thought it was all a dream and if he let go Sam could drift back into unconsciousness.  
“I’ll leave you guys to catch up.” Amelia said sweetly as she filed out of the room.  
“Three months, Sammy. God I missed you.” Dean whispered to his brother.  
They heard Amelia speak again. Not to them this time though. “Nice to see you again, Castiel.”  
To which a deep voice replied. “And you, Amelia.”  
Right. Cas was here. Sam seemed to have this revelation as well because he broke their embrace and his eyes darted from Dean to Cas, with a look of disbelief written upon his face. “He’s still here?” He asked accusingly.  
“Sam, don’t start.” Dean pleaded. He had just gotten his brother back, and they were going to argue within 5 minutes of seeing each other.  
“Hey, I just thought he’d be off killing someone else by now.”  
Now Dean was getting a little annoyed. “Can you please stop being rude to my boyfriend…”  
Sam threw his head back with a sarcastic laugh. “You’re boyfriend tried to kill me.”  
This time Cas stood up for himself. “Technically that is untrue. I was paid to try and kill you, but I never actually did it.”  
Dean tried really hard not to laugh at his boyfriend’s sass and lack of a verbal filter, but evidently failed. Which only served to make Sam more upset.  
“Yeah, It’s all so funny isn’t it Dean? I’m in a hospital bed and the person responsible for that is standing in the doorway and dating my older brother.”  
That made Dean mad. It wasn’t Cas’ fault. Cas saved them. Sam should be cursing at Dean right now, not Cas. “Yeah you know what Sam? He is responsible for you being in this bed, because if he wasn’t paying your hospital bills, they probably would have taken you off life support months ago.” Dean knew his voice was getting louder as he spoke, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. Sam needed to know just how important Cas was.  
Sam’s eyes widened and he started at Castiel. But he didn’t say anything. After a few moments of tense silence Cas spoke up again. “I’m going to go talk to Amelia and find out when Sam can come home.”  
Dean signed. He was so tired. His life had been so emotionally exhausting in the past few months. “Sam, I probably wouldn’t have even been able to get you to the hospital fast enough without Cas’ help. And he's not going anywhere anytime soon, so you’re just going to have to get used to him.”  
Sam took a moment to respond. “You really love him, don’t you?”  
“Sammy, the only person I love more than him, is you.”  
Sam looked shocked at that. Dean didn’t think he had told Sam he loved him since they were kids. It was honestly one of the things he had been thinking a lot about in the last few months. He wasn’t going to waste anymore opportunities to tell Sam he loved him, he had come far too close to losing him.  
“Okay Dean.” Sam said. “I’ll apologise to him later.”  
Cas came back in and informed them that Sam’s recovery was unexpected and also slightly miraculous. There had been nothing to indicate that he was going to wake up and yet somehow he did. The doctors want to keep him over the weekend just to make sure he didn’t go downhill again, but if everything stayed as it was then he could be home by the beginning of the week.  
“I thought I was going to lose you Sammy.” Dean said quietly.  
When Sam looked over at his older brother, he saw tears streaming down his cheeks. He hadn’t seen Dean cry since they were kids and Sam asked Dean to tell him about their mother. Sam felt really guilty for starting an argument about Cas. The last three months would have been so incredibly hard for Dean, and if Cas was there to help him through it then Sam should have been thanking him. He made a mental note to do so later.  
“You can’t get rid of me that easy Dean.” He said, in an attempt to lighten the mood. He simple handle seeing his brother like that.  
“Yeah I hope not.” Dean replied.  
They spent the next few hours talking and catching up on the last three months. Dean told Sam about Bobby, and how he knew about their contract with Crowley, and how they were both almost certainly going to get an ass beating from both Bobby and Ellen for that as soon as Sam was better.  
Cas stayed in the room, he even talked to Sam a little bit about his college course.  
“You’re going to be a teacher? That’s really good Cas.” He said. “Honestly, I always wanted study law.”  
“Why don’t you?” Cas asked. Dean had always told Cas that Sam was the smartest person he had ever met, and Cas had always wondered why Sam would just work at a bar if that was the truth.  
Sam shrugged. “Dad wouldn’t have let me, and after he died we didn’t have the money.”  
“Why don’t you do it now then?” Cas suggested innocently.  
“We still don’t have the money.” Sam laughed.  
Cas tilted his head it thought. “I’ll pay it for you” He said, as if it was the most obvious this in the world.  
Sam stared at him in disbelief, and Dean grinned widely at his boyfriend’s generosity. Dean knew that Cas had more money than he knew what to do with and he was being completely serious about that offer.  
Sam felt another jolt of guilt run through him. Perhaps he had judged the other man too harshly. He could see now why Dean loved him so much. Dean had once told him that Cas didn’t kill because he liked it, he killed because it was what he was trained to do. At the time Sam hadn’t really believed him, but now he could see the humanity in the former assassin. Both the fact that he wanted to be a teacher, and that he had just offered to pay for Sam to go back to school, were a testament to that.  
Before he was able to regain his wit and reply, Amelia came into the room and informed them that visiting hours were over.  
Dean got up and promised to visit again tomorrow as he gave Sam another hug and headed for the door.  
“Will you come tomorrow Castiel?” Sam asked. Cas looked a little hesitant. “I would like you to.” He continued.  
Cas smiled widely. “Then, of course I will Sam.”  
Dean gave him a small smile. Thank you. He mouthed to his brother. And Sam smiled a happy smile as he watched Dean reach for his boyfriend’s hand as they walked down the corridor and out of the hospital.


	15. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One year later, and all is well.

It had been just over a year since Sam had woken up. Dean had insisted that he spend a while living in Dean’s apartment until the oldest Winchester was convinced that he was capable of taking care of himself. It had lasted about a week before Sam had left, yelling about how if he never saw Cas and Dean making out again then it would be too soon.  
Dean knew he was just being really overprotective by insisting Sam stay with him but in the end he was glad he had done it, because Sam and Cas actually ended up being really good friends by the end of it. Sam had apologised for being an ass, and thanked him for paying the bills and after that they got along better than Dean ever would have thought. Honestly, Dean might have been a little jealous if he didn’t already know that Cas thought the world of him.  
So, Dean didn’t really find it all too surprising that once Sam got better Cas once again offered to send him back to school. It had taken a lot of convincing because Sam felt awful about using Castiel’s money, but eventually they had convinced him. And Sam was happier than ever now. He had made a full recovery, his back still hurt where the bullet wound was every now and then but as a whole he was fine. Even better, Sam was now dating his nurse, Amelia. Dean was a little proud of himself for having called it before they had technically been introduced.  
Anyway, once Sam was back at it, the brothers had decided to start their Wednesday afternoon catch up’s again. They had decided to forgo the gun range. Dean still sometimes went there with Cas, but they didn’t really need to keep up their skills anymore so why bother going? Also Sam was in no hurry to ever go near a gun again. So most of the time they just went to the roadhouse to visit Ellen and Jo, who insisted on seeing them more often ever since they had almost lost Sam. Dean couldn’t blame them for that so he happily obliged.  
But on that particular Wednesday afternoon, Dean was dragging his little brother to the mall for the third week in a row, in search of the perfect engagement ring for his boyfriend.  
“Dean, this is the third week in a row. Why can’t you just pick one already?” Sam complained.  
“None of them are right Sammy!” Dean insisted. “It has to be perfect.”  
Sam just rolled his eyes. “Have you two even discussed marriage before?” Sam asked.  
“Well… it’s been mentioned before.” Dean said awkwardly.  
“Why don’t you ask him if he wants it before actually buy the ring?”  
“Because that would be way too predictable, Sammy.” Dean replied, as he pulled Sam into yet another Jewellery store.  
They started browsing the displays. “At least give me some idea of what you’re looking for, so I can help find it.” Sam suggested.  
“I want something simple, but…still nice…” Dean said.  
“Is that all?” Sam said exasperatedly.  
“I dunno Sammy, I always thought I’d see the one I want and I’d just know that was it.”  
Sam chuckled. And Dean thought he wasn’t a romantic.  
It was a sweet sentiment but it really didn’t help either of them in the whole ring buying process, and Sam was about to voice this fact when they were interrupted by the sales assistant of the store.  
“Hello, how are you today? Is there anything I can help you two with?” She asked politely.  
Dean looked as though he was about to refuse her help but Sam immediately jumped him and accepted. He felt a little guilty for rushing Dean’s decision, it wasn’t that he was bitter. In fact, he couldn’t have been happier that Dean wanted to marry Cas, the two were practically perfect in every way. But there was only so much Jewellery shopping a man could take.  
“Okay, what exactly were you looking for?” she asked with a smile.  
“Engagement rings.” Sam told her.  
“Oh, how lovely, there just over here.” She said as she led them to another part of the store. “And, I just wanted to say that you won’t get any trouble from anyone in this store. We accept buyers of any race, religion, colour or sexual orientation.” She still had a smile on her face and her eyes darted between Sam and Dean, who were standing next to each other.  
Dean followed her eyes and then with a rather disgusted tone stated, “We’re brothers.”  
Dean continued to look slightly repulsed as Sam assured the embarrassed store clerk that they weren’t offended.  
“Actually, my brother Dean was looking for a ring for his boyfriend.” Sam told her, reassuring her that she at least got the sexuality part right, and reminding both her and Dean that they were here for a reason.  
As soon as the words left his mouth it was as though she just snapped into Jewellers mode, because she immediately began looking Dean up and down, sizing him up and trying to decide what would work best with him. And then having apparently come to that decision, she smiled.  
“Were you planning on buying rings for both you and your partner? Or just the one?” She asked.  
Dean just shrugged, “Well, if I can’t find two that I like why not?” He said nervously. Dean had always hated asking for help and Sam couldn’t help but roll his eyes at his brother’s misplaced discomfort.  
“What colour eyes does your boyfriend have?” was her next question.  
It was a question that surprised them both, but Dean answered in nonetheless. “Blue.” He said shyly, “His eyes are blue.”  
She smiled. “Perfect, come this way.” She led them over to another display. “Technically these are supposed to be birthstone rings but I think that they’ll work quite well here.” She informed them as we fumbled with the keys to the glass display case. “Now, when people think of green gemstones, they think of an emerald. But there is another stone called a peridot that, I think matches your eyes almost exactly. We have sapphire and blue topaz for the blue stones, you could choose between which one you think best matches him.”  
She presented Dean with a simple, silver band that contained a small green gemstone embedded in the centre. And Sam had to admit, it was a pretty close match to the green of Dean’s eyes. She then gave him another two rings of the same style, with two different stones of separate shades of blue.  
Dean looked at the stones for a total of 2 seconds before gesturing to the lighter stone and saying, “This one. This one matches his eyes.”  
Sam frowned and craned his neck to get a better view. “Are you sure Dean?” Sam thought the other one was closer.  
“I’m pretty sure Sammy.” Dean said, giving Sam his best are you stupid? Look. “I know what colour my boyfriend’s eyes are.”  
Sam raised his hands in surrender. “Okay okay. Would you give him the green one and you’d keep the blue?” He asked.  
Dean gave the darker blue back to the shop assistant and pondered the two rings in his hand.  
“Yeah, I think he’d like them.” Dean said with a little smile.  
The shop assistant smiled before asking, “Do you like them?”  
Sam could help but laugh at the blush that accompanied his brother’s response. “Yeah, I do.”  
And so Dean bought the rings and both the brothers walked out of the store grinning widely. Den handed the ring box to Sam. “Can you hold on to these?” He asked. “I don’t want Cas finding them early.”  
“Yeah, Okay.” Sam said. “I’m gonna have to be there to make sure you don’t chicken out aren’t I?”  
Dean looked appalled. “I would never…” he began, before stopping himself and shrugging. “…Yeah that’s probably a good idea. Come over for dinner Friday night?”  
And with that it was all official. Dean would be proposing Friday night.  
He got home before Cas now that he’d started his teaching job. It was a lot of work, and he often had to stay back late but he loved it. And he was good at it, the kids loved him. Dean remembered driving Cas to work on his first day. He’d been so nervous. His hands had been shaking so much that Dean was forced to tie his tie for him. Dean had kissed him and told him he was going to kill it in there before whispering a quick I love you, and sending him on his way. And sure enough, Dean had been right. Cas had nailed it and come home with the biggest smile on his face that night.  
So when Cas came home that night, Dean was in the kitchen making pasta. “How was your day baby?” He asked when he heard Cas enter the room.  
Cas came up behind him and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s waist. “Missed you.” He whispered as he pressed a kiss to the Dean’s neck.  
“Cas” Dean whined. “I’m trying to cook us dinner.”  
“And I’m trying to seduce you.” Came the smaller man’s reply.  
“But the food will burn.” Dean protested.  
“It is literally pasta in a pot of water Dean, I don’t think it can burn.” Cas said in an amused tone as he kissed Dean’s neck again. Dean though that was a really unfair thing to do, Cas knew how much he loved neck kisses.  
“Cas, that’s not fair.” He complained.  
“Dean, If you don’t come with me to the bedroom, I am going to fuck you in the kitchen, right here, right now.” Cas whispered in his ear, in this deep sex voice that did impossible things to Dean.  
And despite Dean’s former protests, his dick seemed to really like that idea. “Fuck” he cursed as he grabbed Castiel’s hand and led him straight to the bedroom.  
As soon as the door was closed behind him Cas pushed Dean up against the wall and kissed him like it was all he ever wanted to do. His hands came down and grabbed the taller man’s ass, pulling him closer until their pelvis’ were at the same height and they were grinding down on each other. They stayed like that for a few minutes until Dean couldn’t take it anymore, he needed more. “Cas please.” he moaned.  
At Dean’s words Cas took a step back from him lover and Dean whined at the loss of body heat. “Strip and get on the bed.” Cas ordered, his eyes dark with lust. And Dean was more than happy to comply.  
When Dean was undressed he lay down on the bed, so he could he Cas looking down on him with a hunger in his eyes. Cas had taken off his shoes, as well as his trench coat and his suit jacket, but he was still wearing his slacks and his shirt and tie. Dean wanted nothing more than to rip off his remaining clothes but Cas was running the show tonight.  
Cas lightly kissed Dean all over his face while his hands roamed over Dean’s chest until his fingers reached Dean’s nipples, he earned a high pitched moan from his boyfriend when he gave them a pinch.  
Dean loved it when Cas got like this. When he made it his mission to get Dean to scream. And to his merit, Dean usually complied. Cas was straddling Dean now, and grinding down of his lovers hard cock. Dean was getting desperate now, moaning now than he usually did for that early in the event. “Someone’s getting loud tonight.” Castiel commented.  
“You’re not … ugh… exactly helping.” Dean moaned.  
“I’m going to have to do something about that, wouldn’t want the neighbours to complain would we?” Dean knew that the neighbours were really no problem, but he was happy to go along with Castiel’s game. He was especially happy to when Cas started taking off his tie.  
The dark haired man then proceeded to tighten the tie around his head and place it in Dean’s mouth, effectively working as a make-shift gag. Dean only took the movement as a pretense of what was to come and he started pushing his hips upwards trying to direct Cas with his actions rather than his unavailable words.  
Seeing his boyfriend’s desperation, Cas got up and Dean practically sobbed. “Turn over. On your hands and knees.” And while Dean obeyed, he heard Cas stripping off his clothes and fetching the lube from their draw.  
The next thing Dean felt was a lubed up finger pressing into him. He moaned and arched his back. He started to canter his hips, effectively fucking himself back on Castiel’s fingers. A few minutes later Cas was fucking three fingers in and out of Dean’s ass and reveling in the sound of Dean’s moans muffled by his tie.  
Deciding it was unfair to keep either of them waiting any longer, Cas lubed up his cock and slowly pressed into Dean. Dean’s hands were clenched in the sheets and his back arched as Castiel started picking up the pace. Soon they had developed a rhythm, Dean was pushing back and meeting Cas with each forceful thrust until they were both dripping with sweat and so close to the edge.  
Cas loved Dean’s muffled chant of his name and decided that gagging was definitely something they would be looking into again soon. But for now, he reached his hand around and started to pump his boyfriend’s neglected cock at the same speed as his thrusts.  
It didn’t take long for Dean to come after that and Cas knew that he would have been practically screaming had it not been for the tie in his mouth. Cas fucked Dean through his orgasm and it wasn’t long before he was moaning and coming at the feel of Dean tightly clenching around him.  
They both collapsed and it wasn’t until a few moments later, when Dean made a sort of grunting noise that Cas realised he should probably take out the gag.  
Once he did that, he pulled Dean into a slow kiss. They stayed like that for a minute or so, until the heard the smoke alarm go off and were both reminded of the dinner they had left cooking in the kitchen. Cas laughed while Dean groaned and ran into the kitchen, cursing Cas for distracting him.  
“At least you get to say I told you so.” Cas called affectionately.  
Needless to say they ordered take out that night.

…

 

Two nights later and Dean was incredibly nervous. Sam was over and Dean could see the little bulge of the ring box in his brother’s pocket. He was planning on waiting until after dinner because Cas had spent most of the afternoon cooking up Sam’s favourite meal, but as the minutes ticked closer to that time Dean got increasingly more nervous.  
He had known for a long time that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Cas, but with every second he was beginning to question if the feelings were mutual. And Cas was starting to notice his angst.  
“Dean, is everything okay?”  
“What? Of course it is.” Dean cursed himself for being such a bad liar and he knew that Cas certainly wasn’t convinced, but he didn’t push.  
Sam was chuckling at Dean’s nerves. “Sammy, can I talk to you for a moment?” As soon as they were out of Castiel’s hearing range, Dean looked up at his brother with terrified eyes. “I can’t do this.” He said. “I can’t. We’ll just take the rings back tomorrow and…”  
“Whoa Dean, calm down.” Sam didn’t think he had ever seen his brother so flustered.  
“I can’t calm down Sammy!” Dean argued. “What if he doesn’t want to get married, I haven’t even asked.”  
“Technically you're asking now.”  
Dean gave his a frustrated look. “Not helping Sam.”  
Sam sighed and put his hand on Dean’s shoulder in reassurance. “Castiel loves you more than anything.” He started. “Of course he’s going to want to marry you.”  
“You sure?” Dean asked. Sam couldn’t help but hate how vulnerable Dean sounded and his he didn’t already know that it was because of their father the Dean felt himself to be inadequate, then he would probably wondered how someone could think so low of themselves.  
“Yes, I am 100 percent sure.”  
“Okay.” Dean said quietly. “Do you want to give me the box?”  
“Now?” Sam asked.  
“If I don’t do it now, I’ll just get too nervous again later.” So Sam handed him the box and they walked back into the kitchen. Cas was standing in the kitchen, sipping a beer and waiting for the dinner to finish.  
“Hey Cas, I wanted to ask you something.” Cas looked a little bit suspicious but he just nodded, “You’ve done a lot for Sam and me since we met you.” He started, he had been going through what he wanted to say in his head for the last two days. “You’re family to the both of us, but to me you're everything.” His voice was getting shakier with every word. “I love you so much. More than I ever thought was possible, and I decided a long time ago that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. So…” Dean paused for a moment as he not down on one knee and retrieved the ring box from his pocket, he heard Cas gasp and when he looked up, there were tears in his lover’s eyes. “…Will you marry me, Castiel?”  
Cas didn’t respond immediately. Instead he too got down on his knees, so that he was at eye level with Dean. He took the two rings out of the box and smiled when he realised what the colours were meant to represent. He reached for Dean’s hand and slid the ring with the blue stone onto his fiancé’s finger, and then did the same with his own.  
He pulled Dean into a loving kiss, his cheeks damp with tears. “Don’t ask stupid questions, Dean.”  
Dean laughed and pulled Cas into another kiss. They sat like that for god knows how long. Sitting on the kitchen floor grinning into the others neck as they refused to release their embrace. It wasn’t until Sam informed them that dinner was ready and on the table that they got up.  
And if Dean spent the rest of the night admiring the way both he and Castiel looked wearing an engagement ring, no one had to know, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Yay Happy Ending*
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you to everyone who read this!! Feedback and comments would be awesome, I would love to improve my writing in any way I can!  
> And yeah, if you have anything you wanna say just comment it and I'll get back to you. And if I'm being honest, i would love it if you guys gave me prompts because I tend to get stuck with that kind of stuff. :P
> 
> Again thank you so much for sticking till the end and I hope you all enjoyed it!!!! xxxxxxxxxx


End file.
